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LGBROWN2's Photo LGBROWN2 Posts: 48
9/6/09 9:05 A

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JAQILANTERN, thanks for the help. I did the same thing but it was three nights in a row. Nice to know I am not alone.

I didn't replace what I ate, and provided healthier alternatives in place (pantry AND freezer) instead.

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KAYOTIC's Photo KAYOTIC Posts: 12,909
9/5/09 11:49 A

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It is more difficult if you work in a culture that involves food. My director likes to introduce new employees at department meetings saying something like:
"you will find that we like to eat in this department, and we especially like chocolate" when she gives them a "welcome-to-the-department" gift of chocolate. It's a tough nut to crack, but I try to bring healthier items in to share, especially at pot lucks. Then at least I know I have something I can indulge in without breaking my calorie bank! And if I want to try some decadent looking dish, I'll have a little, and not feel guilty about it. I can always tack on an extra 15 minutes at the gym for the next couple of days...

This was more long winded than I intended, but the main thing is, just do what you can to be true to your program, and realize you can't make others conform to your new way of life, but you can show them how it works and you never know when that example will rub off, and others will join in your efforts!

highest weight ever:202, SP starting weight: 143

New goal: more practical new goal, 129, update ticker to reflect that goal.

H: 5''4" 50 y.o.

"Don''t let yesterday use up too much of today." Will Rogers

"Eat Food, Not Too Much, Mostly Plants" Michael Pollan



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WATERMELLEN's Photo WATERMELLEN Posts: 4,987
9/2/09 9:27 P

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I'm sure you're right, KAYOTIC, and I've got to learn how to deal with "realworld" temptations. Or not. And without beating myself up when it's or not.

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KAYOTIC's Photo KAYOTIC Posts: 12,909
9/2/09 9:55 A

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I think part of being healthy and maintaining is finding out how to live in the world we have, and that includes temptations. Where I work people bring stuff in. I just have had to learn to pass the candy dish and pass on the doughnuts, and partake in the fruits and veggies from others gardens. You make these things off limits when you go grocery shopping, so you should be able to do that other places as well. It takes time and practice, so don't beat yourself up if you grab a cookie off a plate at work, just remind yourself of your goals, and try to pass it by the next time. It may help to have some healthy snacks at your desk that you can go to when those temptations crop up. Or try to avoid those areas where those temptations reside!

Good luck!

highest weight ever:202, SP starting weight: 143

New goal: more practical new goal, 129, update ticker to reflect that goal.

H: 5''4" 50 y.o.

"Don''t let yesterday use up too much of today." Will Rogers

"Eat Food, Not Too Much, Mostly Plants" Michael Pollan



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BESTSUSIEYET's Photo BESTSUSIEYET Posts: 3,513
8/31/09 5:38 P

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Right you are! I was saying take the left-over birthday cake to work instead of keeping it at home & eating yourself.

"Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress." I Timothy 4:15

1 Cor. 10:23 "Everything is permissable, but not everything is beneficial."
(NIV)



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WATERMELLEN's Photo WATERMELLEN Posts: 4,987
8/31/09 5:35 P

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Must say, I really find it tough when well-meaning colleagues bring high cal treats to work -- where I can't help see them/smell them/crave them!! And too often, cave. As I say, I can resist anything but temptation and work hard not to have tempation at my home. I'd prefer healthy treats only at work or even better frankly NO treats. What do the rest of you think?

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BESTSUSIEYET's Photo BESTSUSIEYET Posts: 3,513
8/31/09 12:04 P

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Been there, done that -- hope not to repeat, but it may happen. I ate 3 small pieces of dessert at church picnic yesterday -- better there, where it's public and available for limited time than at home, where "no one knows" and I might eat the whole thing!! Everyone is so helpful, and right -- we just move past it. I am getting so I take things like cake to work and bring them out at Staff meeting, so others will eat instead of me. But I am also deliberating bringing healthy snacks to share -- people are usually surprised that low fat, low cal can be yummy!

"Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress." I Timothy 4:15

1 Cor. 10:23 "Everything is permissable, but not everything is beneficial."
(NIV)



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RUSSLANE's Photo RUSSLANE Posts: 401
8/25/09 3:10 P

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That is an interesting thought.

Best,
Russ Lane

Fight for the Good Stuff

We Keep It Off.com:
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Befriend WKIO on Facebook |
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If you lost 30 pounds and kept it off a year, volunteer for the National Weight Control Registry
www.nwcr.ws/default.htm Vive La Resistance!
SHRLZI's Photo SHRLZI Posts: 4,088
8/25/09 2:46 P

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Bethanyboo,

"...your body has a mind of its own" may be more profound than you realize!

Some people would say the body **is** your subconscious mind; that every emotional experience is stored in your body as habitual holding and movement patterns. Do cravings come from the subconscious body-mind? How are they related to body type and emotional history? You've given me something to think about.
emoticon

...there is a place in you where you have never been wounded, where there's still a sureness in you, where there's a seamlessness in you, and where there is a confidence and tranquility in you. ~John O'Donohue
being.publicradio.org/programs/2010/
inner-landscape/transcript.shtml


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BETHANYBOO's Photo BETHANYBOO Posts: 1,998
8/25/09 10:28 A

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I have been there, done that more times than I can count! I have no self control sometimes. I know exactly what you mean - it's like your body has a mind of its own!

Strong is the new skinny!!


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RUSSLANE's Photo RUSSLANE Posts: 401
8/22/09 9:30 A

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Hey darlin',

Some great thoughts by everyone -- forgive y'self and move on.

But crying about it isn't silly in the slightest -- I hope you realize you're not really crying about the cake, but something far deeper than that. It's Ok.

I know for myself punishment was a big thing with me pre-weight. After the fact, we can go on punishing ourselves for not being The Perfect Weight Loss Success Stories if we choose to. But that's just for TV people, that "perfect" crap. Beating yourself up over one slip can wreck far more damage than the calories would.

Besides, you had the balls to come to all of us with this. I know some of my slip ups, I wouldn't dare tell a soul. You really are brave and lovely -- something icing can't take away.

Love and respect -- Russ

Best,
Russ Lane

Fight for the Good Stuff

We Keep It Off.com:
www.wekeepitoff.com

Befriend WKIO on Facebook |
www.facebook.com/SecondHelping

If you lost 30 pounds and kept it off a year, volunteer for the National Weight Control Registry
www.nwcr.ws/default.htm Vive La Resistance!
KAYOTIC's Photo KAYOTIC Posts: 12,909
8/21/09 2:55 P

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Just a couple of thoughts, I loved the Jillian Michaels quote! And about "mom's" cake being too precious to throw away: can you bring it to work to share with others? Or share with friends/neighbors? I understand not wanting to waste it, but it's also not doing you any good keeping it in the house, if it leads you to binge and feel badly about yourself...especially since you didn't enjoy it much!

highest weight ever:202, SP starting weight: 143

New goal: more practical new goal, 129, update ticker to reflect that goal.

H: 5''4" 50 y.o.

"Don''t let yesterday use up too much of today." Will Rogers

"Eat Food, Not Too Much, Mostly Plants" Michael Pollan



 current weight: 4.6  over
 
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WATERMELLEN's Photo WATERMELLEN Posts: 4,987
8/20/09 8:27 P

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I don't have much willpower so -- all I can do is avoid temptation by not having binge trigger foods (for me, potato chips, cookies, chocolate) in the house. If they are there, I've at some level already decided to eat them: it's just a question of when. So I agree with those who advise -- just get rid of the treats (except: don't get rid of them by eating them!!). Chocolate (the really good 80% cocoa type) is something I keep in the individually wrapped 30 calorie squares in my locker at the gym as a reward after working out: but I'm not likely to binge there in public, right???? So again, not a question of will power, just avoiding temptation. For now, though, and particularly once you've figured out what's going on (not wanting to insult your mother by throwing the cake out?? but does she have to know???) it's great to forgive yourself and just move on . . .

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ZUCCHINIQUEEN's Photo ZUCCHINIQUEEN Posts: 7,640
8/19/09 9:10 A

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I have the same problem. Forgive yourself and get back on program. This is not a character flaw, but a normal thing we all have to deal with.

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ETAGGEL's Photo ETAGGEL SparkPoints: (88,552)
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8/18/09 11:15 P

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Forgive yourself. It is done, it is over, that was yesterday! Dont forget about it but put it down to experience. And full marks for having the honesty to post this!

Best wishes

Phyllis
Co-leader of the Emotional Eaters team
Leader of Alamance County, NC, team
Leader of The SP Class 0f June 14-20,2009
SparkPeople Motivator

IN GOD I TRUST!

If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; if you can dream it, you can become it.
William Arthur Ward

Goals are the fuel in the furnace of achievement.
Brian Tracy, Eat that Frog

Today is the Tomorrow I worried about Yesterday!



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TRYINGHARD1948's Photo TRYINGHARD1948 Posts: 19,906
8/18/09 6:24 P

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This post really made me think about the crutches that we all use for one reason or another, smoking, bingeing, drinking. None of them good for us but for some reason we do it to our selves from time to time. Like Shrlzi, I smoked many, many years ago and drank, and it is amazing how when stress hits these old crutches rear up offering momentary solace and days of regret. The only way to look at it for me is to face the truth and get over it. Remember to congratulate ourselves for the journey we have taken and the successes we have had, stumbling doesn't mean we have failed.

Edited by: TRYINGHARD1948 at: 8/18/2009 (18:25)
Sandy



"Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections but instantly set about remedying them -- every day begin the task anew."
Saint Francis de Sales


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SHRLZI's Photo SHRLZI Posts: 4,088
8/18/09 6:14 P

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Keep at it -- I think the longer you stay away from refined sugar stuff the more you lose your taste for it.

Although... I quit smoking more than 30 years ago, and hadn't even thought of cigarettes in years. But something particularly stressful came up a while ago -- and there it was, all the old habits that came with wanting a cigarette. By that time, I could just laugh at it -- but it made me realize again how strong those old habits are.

All best to you!

...there is a place in you where you have never been wounded, where there's still a sureness in you, where there's a seamlessness in you, and where there is a confidence and tranquility in you. ~John O'Donohue
being.publicradio.org/programs/2010/
inner-landscape/transcript.shtml


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JAQILANTERN's Photo JAQILANTERN Posts: 300
8/18/09 5:25 P

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Thanks everyone!

Sometimes it's easy to forget that you aren't alone in these types of experiences. I was starting to feel like there was something really wrong with me. I have spent years abusing food, so a setback like this seems usual. I agree (with STRAWBERRY_KIWI)that there may be a deeper issue to why I binged. What that is, I'm still unsure, which is what makes me nervous about a next time. I am planning to use all the tricks to avoid giving in. Like drinking water, brushing my teeth, making tea ...

I really would love to not have this stuff in the house. I wanted to throw the cake away, but it's my mom's. I can eat it, just not throw it away. emoticon I should exercise my will power though. Months ago this would not have happened. I want to get back to that place where I was really focused and stronger than food.
emoticon emoticon
I appreciate your feedback and hope to see more replies.

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MOMMYFITNESS's Photo MOMMYFITNESS Posts: 12,317
8/18/09 4:48 P

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Oh my gosh, I have soooo be there! As for why we do this to ourselves, I don't know. I always beat myself up when I binge. All you can do is get rid of the sweets and move on. Good luck and keep your head up. emoticon

"Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food."

Romans 14:20a (NIV)







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STRAWBERRY_KIWI's Photo STRAWBERRY_KIWI Posts: 179
8/18/09 3:18 P

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There may be some deeper issues that are causing you to binge (which you may want to explore through discussion, journaling, etc.), but I am a firm believer in behaviour modification in the meantime to protect yourself and set yourself up for success.

For starters, why not just get rid of the cake and any other foods in your house that are leading you to binge, especially since you said you didn't even enjoy the cake? You can't binge on what's not there.

Here is a quote I love from nutrition expert Dr. John Berardi, which he calls "Berardi's Law":

"If a food is in your possession or located in your residence, you'll eventually eat it. If you wish to be healthy and lean, you must remove all foods not conducive to those goals from said residence and replace them with a variety of better, healthier choices. If you know someone whose house is stocked only with optimal food choices and yet who is not healthy and lean, look under his bed."

I completely agree with the other posters that you should forgive yourself and move on. You've come so far, and this is just a tiny setback, nothing that you can't overcome.

Another quote I love that might be helpful from Jillian Michaels:

"Alright, so you had a setback. You've got a flat tire. What are you going to do, get out and slash the other three tires?"

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SHEL151's Photo SHEL151 Posts: 1,132
8/18/09 1:51 P

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I have done the same thing for the past two nights and keep beating myself up over it but I think the more we beat ourselves up the worst we binge. We are only human and all we can do it keep moving and trying. Lets get back on track and just push past this bad time.

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SHRLZI's Photo SHRLZI Posts: 4,088
8/18/09 1:40 P

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Forgive yourself, and move on! even a whole cake will not keep you from your goal, if it's not an every-day thing. I just got back from a short vacation - four days of all restaurant food - and am up 4 lb - but with cutting back a bit over the next week I know I'll get back where I want to be.
You go girl! emoticon

...there is a place in you where you have never been wounded, where there's still a sureness in you, where there's a seamlessness in you, and where there is a confidence and tranquility in you. ~John O'Donohue
being.publicradio.org/programs/2010/
inner-landscape/transcript.shtml


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JAQILANTERN's Photo JAQILANTERN Posts: 300
8/18/09 12:00 P

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I usually use Spark People boards and blog to celebrate successes, but this time I am confessing that I've been feeling like a big failure. Last night I felt SO BAD. I went on a lovely evening jog with my boyfriend and afterward he made me a wonderful low cal veggie sandwich as a snack. By that time it was already 9pm and I was about to hit the hay in an hour. I got home and wasn't hungry, but I knew that there was leftover birthday cake in the fridge. Cake that I had BINGED on the night before!

I told myself, "You don't want that. You're not hungry. You don't want to feel the way you felt last night. Don't do it!" But as if my body had a mind of it's own, I opened the fridge, took out the cake and started shoveling! The cake wasn't even good! Why was I doing that to myself?! I just ran, I just ate. I didn't understand and still don't understand. I felt awful! I know better! I felt like I lost complete control. I called my boyfriend to let him know I got home safe and to say goodnight. I didn't want to tell him about what I did. He always expresses how proud of me he is for adopting a healthy lifestyle. I thought I had failed myself and him because I motivate him. I fessed up and started to cry. Cry about cake! I felt so silly, but it's more than that. I lost control and deliberately sabotaged myself and don't understand why. I was well nourished and I don't deprive myself of anything. So why did this happen twice in a row? Well, Oscar (my boyfriend) was very sweet and supportive and actually encouraged me to confess on Spark People to get some feedback and let go of feeling ashamed. Thanks for giving me a place to do that.

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