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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
3/15/12 3:11 P

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Thank you for the info. The "how to freeze" was going to be my next post!! You are physic!

Here goes!!

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
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COOKIEBAKERCAT's Photo COOKIEBAKERCAT Posts: 3,839
3/15/12 7:46 A

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Edited by: COOKIEBAKERCAT at: 9/2/2012 (18:29)
“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

"See You "Lighter"........Cat =^..^=
LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
3/14/12 11:50 P

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I was wondering if they froze good, and your idea of trying a batch first I'm going to try tomorrow, then take them out when our friends arrive and let them give me the Y or N taste test. Now for the good news.....my friend called me today and told me Staci had asked others to help and she's gotten several other "brownie makers"!!! Thank you, Jesus! The Lord always provides when you to do things willingly.

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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ANGORA4's Photo ANGORA4 SparkPoints: (28,124)
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3/14/12 9:56 P

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Vicki, so glad you're going to get a little break. Can you freeze the brownies as you make them, so you don't have to do them all at once? And then thaw everything before the wedding? Not sure how well your recipe freezes, but I know some freeze very well. Might take the pressure off. That way you could do a batch or two at a time, instead of a mountain all at once! Might try a batch, freeze, then thaw later, and check to see if it meets your standards once thawed. If a batch makes 12 brownies, and you want 2 each for 300, that's 600 brownies divided by 12, or 50 batches! Which sounds awful, but if you could do just two double batches a day, that'd be done in 12 1/2 days. Of course your recipe may make lots more than a dozen brownies in one batch, which would drastically lower the number of batches!

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
3/13/12 9:32 P

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Hi all! Been so busy lately, and got a lot of things going on the next two weeks. My best friend's daughter is getting married and she asked me to make brownies for the reception (300 people). Oh My!! Any suggestions?

My DH's best friend and his wife are coming down from Ohio next week for five days, and we're really looking forward to not only friends visiting, but also making their week a good one.

We are putting mother in respite care for the week, and she is not a happy camper. She's becoming very "clingy" to me and I'm sure that's the reason she doesn't want to go, but she did agree...with a few choice words. :) We are just encouraging her to enjoy the other residents, and remind her that when she visited there in November, she said she loved it. Of course, now she says she didn't, but who knows. She doesn't really remember anything about it, so I'm not too upset about that. It's only 5 miles away, so if need be, we can go see her.

Glad most of us are doing ok. :)

Have a good rest of the week!

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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3/13/12 1:16 P

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HORSELOVER, so glad you could stop in, and glad your dad is on the upward swing now. That's a lot to deal with at any age. Sending prayers. Know it's hard when the whole family isn't pulling together, but proud of you for recognizing life isn't ideal, and making the best of it. Good for you! We all deal with things that are less than ideal, never fun, but necessary to life.

What is the hardest thing you have to deal with right now?

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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HORSELOVER54's Photo HORSELOVER54 Posts: 119
3/13/12 7:58 A

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Hello again to all of my caregiver friends. Just checking in and caught up on all your posts. A lot of ups and downs! That is what is going on in my life. Dad was doing well at the assisted living and then began to have health problems again. He has been in and out of the hospital. Thank God they finally found the problem and he had surgery on Friday. He is doing well even though his colon was perforated and infected and he has a very weak heart. The man is amazingly strong!! He will have to go to rehab and then hopefully back to his new home. It will be like starting over again as far as adjusting to living alone. Siblings are still up to their old tricks but I am used to it by now. Still looking for the new normal in my life.....Prayers for all of you.....send some my way too!! An early Happy St. Patrick's Day!!
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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
3/12/12 9:56 A

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I understand also with the elderly "pets", they are family to me. It is so hard when they are ill, but not to different then an elderly parent that can no longer tell you what is wrong. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your little family members.
Hope your husband is doing better and they find out what is wrong with his leg.
My oldest daughter just found out her father went to the hospital. He had a mini stroke she was told. Even though we do not talk to him and I know he is not a part of my girls life, I still feel sorry for him. So please pray for him. He is not that old but a life of alcohol can age you quickly and all the extra weight from drinking takes its toll on ones body.
Thank you.:)
EDIT: Forgot to mention, could use a prayer myself. Going wednesday to have my other cataract done. Am excited and nervous.

Edited by: MOKAY54 at: 3/12/2012 (09:58)
Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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3/12/12 3:49 A

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So sweet of you to do all you can to make him feel better, you have such a caring heart. I think this is where we caregivers have an advantage, we've already realized that normal life is always throwing curves, and we just deal with it. Don't always like it, but we deal with it.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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SPARKLES's Photo SPARKLES SparkPoints: (146,422)
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3/12/12 12:31 A

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Thanks Judy - & never fear on me not having any humans to help - DH woke up this morning feeling like he has another blood clot in his leg. Geez Lueeze we're hoping not. But if it isn't a clot, we sure want to know why his leg is hurting so bad!

(I've been trying to cater to him today - made his fave recipes for dinner & dessert: sour cream chicken enchiladas and apple crisp)

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3/11/12 9:19 P

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Jenn, so sorry to hear about your furry friends. Having had elderly pets, I sure understand. It's so hard. So sorry.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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SPARKLES's Photo SPARKLES SparkPoints: (146,422)
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3/11/12 9:05 A

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Stopping by to say hello. I may not be in the "people" caregiving mode anymore, but I sure am with my 2 elderly dogs. The time and expense and attention required matches any human dependent. I fear I may lose my little one soon. She seems well in some ways, but she has some very sick kidneys the vet says, and the arthritis in her back legs make it hard for her to stand on slick floors, so I'm working on getting mats down on all my tile. I'm going to make one more attempt at salvaging her this week. And now my big dog is showing her age too & having troubles.

I'm sorry - I know this is NOT a team/thread for pets, but I sure feel a lot of the same feelings.

Jenn

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3/8/12 9:56 P

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Just realized my other messages didn't post, oh well. Anyway, just wanted to check in and see how things were going for everyone.

I was thinking of what I'd like most, some time alone, to just unwind and do something fun, something not needed or required or desperate. . .something slow and useless and just plain fun. Maybe a nap! A walk, read a book, draw or paint, write a computer program just for fun.

What would you like to do most?

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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COOKIEBAKERCAT's Photo COOKIEBAKERCAT Posts: 3,839
3/8/12 8:30 A

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Edited by: COOKIEBAKERCAT at: 9/2/2012 (18:29)
“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

"See You "Lighter"........Cat =^..^=
MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
3/8/12 7:51 A

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Sorry you mom is not up to par. So sad to hear about the school shooting. Always a tragedy to loss a life and two is just so sad. Both families are in my thoughts and prayers, also all the poor children and others that where at the school. It must have been so scary.
Hope the rest are doing well.

Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
3/6/12 6:59 P

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Good things never last, sad to say. For some unknown reason, Mom got angry with me and refused to eat dinner. She's been "touchy" all day, and we don't know why. Just another glitch in the makeup, I suppose. I know she'll be better after a night's sleep. I pray, at least. BUT it could be worse!

On a sad note, we had a shooting at one of our private high schools (Episcopal) today. A 28-year-old Spanish teacher shot and killed the Head Mistress of the school. He had been fired yesterday, went back to his classroom today and had to be physically removed after demanding the sub leave. He returned home, hid an AK47 in a guitar case, went back to school and shot the HM and then killed himself. What a tragedy. She (Dale Regan) had been at the school for 34 years, has won so many awards in education and leadership, and was so well-respected in not only our city, but also in nationally. She was a jewel.

Please keep her and her family, and also the young man's family in your prayers. You just never know what is going to happen these days when you walk out your front door. No one knows what may have happened for the firing, but after this, there must have been a good reason to start with. That has not been released yet.

Hope all of you are ok and remember to give an extra hug tonight to your loved ones.



"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
3/6/12 8:38 A

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Stopping in to check up on all my care giving friends. Hope all are well.
Good news Lakotalady. Bet that is a relief.
Miss you all and keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
2/27/12 11:11 P

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Had a good day! Mom's Carotid Artery is holding at 50-60%, so that was certainly good news. She and my best friend went to lunch afterwards, my friend visited for 4 hours and we talked out!! Got to watch the 500, crashes and all, and will wait until it starts again for the finish.

Good day!


"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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2/27/12 7:50 P

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Leslie,have things improved?

Weather here is crazy, snow one day, then sun and open flowers the next. The poor bees look so lost in the snow, with only a few snowdrops open. Usually wouldn't be open for another month, really weird weather.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
2/22/12 9:42 P

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So sorry to hear the news, Leslie. I pray things will get better soon. Things have been pretty good today. Found Kentucky's last night ballgame on rerun and Mother was happy all day!
Maybe I can find another one tomorrow! :)


"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
2/22/12 7:14 A

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Leslie, sorry about all this happening to dad and mom. Hope things will be going better now that they know what is wrong.
CHERYLE51, sorry about MIL. It is harder for them.
My prayers and thoughts are with you both and the rest of our group.
No change on mom, doing about same.

Edited by: MOKAY54 at: 2/22/2012 (07:15)
Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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LESLIE_2B_LESS's Photo LESLIE_2B_LESS SparkPoints: (119,191)
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2/22/12 1:25 A

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I've had a few bad days with my Dad..
Dad was taken by ambulance on Sunday night to ER and then admitted. He fell 3 times on Sunday and wasn't able to walk or even communicate very well. His hemoglobin was down to a 5.5 - terribly low and his blood pressure was so low that they could barely read it.
Ends up that he has 2 ulcers in his stomach and 1 in his small intestine and those were bleeding because of the blood thinners he has been on. They cauterized those and gave him 4 pints of blood and other fluids. He was able to come home tonight but it was pretty scary there for awhile. They've reduced the dosage of the blood thinner shot I am giving him every day and he will be taking prilosec every day to help with the acid in his stomach.

He will be having a catscan on 3/21 to see how the chemo embolization went and how the cancer is reacting to it all. I didn't eat too well on Sunday/Monday, but did better on Tuesday. Didn't get any exercise in Sun/Mon unless you count pacing the halls of the ER / hospital!

Mom didn't react at all well to all this - seems to have made her confusion even greater. This all just makes me so sad.

Leslie MO
Central Time Zone

CL - Determined Daisies Summer 2014

Helen Keller explained the purpose of community best, when she said, "Alone we can do so little. Together we can do so much."

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Your daily actions and words impact more people than you realize! Who will you impact today?


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COOKIEBAKERCAT's Photo COOKIEBAKERCAT Posts: 3,839
2/20/12 7:55 A

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Edited by: COOKIEBAKERCAT at: 9/2/2012 (18:29)
“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

"See You "Lighter"........Cat =^..^=
CHERYLE51's Photo CHERYLE51 Posts: 2,109
2/19/12 7:17 P

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Hello Everyone,
MIL has been doing amazingly well, now she has had a hopefully, minor setback. She is back in the hospital with a urinary tract infection that has entered her bloodstream. Everyone is passing this off as no big deal, but with her age at 92, everything is a big deal.

My husband gets very upset and depressed when she gets sick. She was doing so well and she was so happy that she was allowed to go to the bathroom on her own and was one of the few people in the nursing home not needing oxygen. Hopefully, this too shall pass.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger...


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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
2/19/12 8:05 A

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Just popping in to check on everyone. Guess you are all busy with care giving. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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ANGORA4's Photo ANGORA4 SparkPoints: (28,124)
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2/10/12 10:19 P

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Vicki, I can so empathize with your lack of time with your husband. I had that problem, too, and many others here as well. We also had the money issues. Now, I realize that I could have done double duty, choosing to eat less, and putting the money not spent on the food into a kitty towards a sitter. Providing both better nutrition and health and an emotional boost as well. We found a way to buy those unneeded 'treats'. I could have used it much better for some time away! I hope to implement that plan this year, to provide for a little time together.

MOKAY, so sorry about the pain. Our prayers are with you.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
2/10/12 5:43 P

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Just stopping in to check on all my loving friends here. I will have to get that mag and read it. Went to my doctor and said enough is enough, can not live in pain any more. It is getting to hard to even get through the day but when I have to sit with mom at dialysis and then at nursing home, can not move the next day, Also can not sleep at night because if I move it wakes me up. So finally sending me to a specialist and if he can not help then to pain management. Other than this mom is doing okay, holding her own. Her birthday is sunday she will be 82, we are having a party at the home for her.
Anyways you are all in my thoughts and prayers always.

Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
2/9/12 7:09 P

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Judy, so much of what you wrote I go through daily. If only my DH and I could get away for a day! What a difference that would make!! We just take one day at a time and wait, for what, we're not sure, but we still wait. Wait to get away? Wait to have a moment together? Wait to hear if Mom is sick? Wait to see if she gets up? Wait to see what kind of egg shells we need to walk on today? So many different feelings right now because we are sooooo tied down.

I am checking into caregivers for a day, and maybe that will help. Money is such a problem, and Mom didn't save anything and has nothing but her Medicare/Supplement. With our two children out of jobs, we need to help them as much as possible also. I just keep praying and coming back to this team. What would I do without you??? Just reading helps me so much.

Again, so glad you posted this. I, for one, can relate.


LL

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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2/9/12 5:01 P

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So true, Cat. Just saw a copy of a local Caregiver magazine while waiting at the eye dr. The main thrust of the articles was just that. . .you can't do everything, and if you try, you're going to burn out. You need time away, time to recharge. And don't feel guilty about it, it's important.

One article told of one young caregiver, who spent those rare times away at a restaurant or similar place with her husband, just soaking up 'normal' conversations between the patrons. Conversations without medical issues, doctor appointments, end of life issues, and caregiving issues. Sometimes they would listen to music, or talk of things of no consequence. Just simple 'normal' chit chat that is so rare in a caregiver's world. They recharged her to return to her caregiving duties, having filled up her 'normal life' tank. If you don't seek balance, normality, life. . .you can get sucked down into the death watch.

Another article was written by a caregiver on death watch. She was terrified to leave her parents' bedsides, for fear they would pass while she was out. She'd stay out for 20 minutes, and then feel terrible guilt for being away, and rush back, all apologetic. She finally realized that this panicky need to be there on call every minute, wasn't helping anyone. She was sucking her life resources dry. And if her parent had passed while she was out, it was not something she should feel guilty over.

(I remember reading several times elsewhere that the parent would often wait until the caregiver had gone out for a bit to pass away, with the writer hypothesizing that the parent might feel they didn't want their loved one to watch them die, and felt 'safe' slipping away while the caregiver was away. My own mom passed while I was out, even though I was spending up to 20 hours a day with her.)

Many of the articles were about the importance of time away to recharge. Others were about the therapy value of hugs, the importance of having someone to stop by and encourage the elderly, and planning ahead for your own need for caregiving. Most caregivers are so busy denying their own needs, that they have not prepared for the time when they may be the one needing care. So they suggested thinking about what plans would makeyour own care go better.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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COOKIEBAKERCAT's Photo COOKIEBAKERCAT Posts: 3,839
2/9/12 8:18 A

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Edited by: COOKIEBAKERCAT at: 9/2/2012 (18:28)
“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

"See You "Lighter"........Cat =^..^=
LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
2/8/12 11:08 P

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Gotta share this. I went to Walmart today and picked up the LAST copy of the Women's Day mag! Great article, and going fast. Thanks again, Cat!

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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2/7/12 11:53 P

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Cat, thanks so much for sharing that. New resources are always welcome! When you see an entire article just on caregiver burnout, it shows how prevalent this problem is. If you're feeling the effects of burnout, you're not alone! But there are things that can help, so don't give up. It can be helped, there is hope!

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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FRANANN3's Photo FRANANN3 Posts: 1,317
2/7/12 10:38 P

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THANKS CAT!!Will pick that up on my grocery rounds tomorrow! Hope all's well! How's that new job??? any word??

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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
2/7/12 6:53 P

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I have to go get a script tomorrow and will definitely get it. Thanks for letting us know.

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
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COOKIEBAKERCAT's Photo COOKIEBAKERCAT Posts: 3,839
2/7/12 3:10 P

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Edited by: COOKIEBAKERCAT at: 9/2/2012 (18:28)
“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

"See You "Lighter"........Cat =^..^=
LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
1/31/12 12:05 A

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Thank you, Judy. I really feel that God loved the animals so much that He gave us two of each one of them!! :)

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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1/30/12 10:23 P

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Vicki, I love the quotes you have in your signature line. So much to think about. Great perspectives.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
1/29/12 11:47 P

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Judy, what a wonderful analogy. Makes total sense, but sometimes the pets give us more than the ones we're taking care of. My body? Pretty bad signals right now. And I'm going to have to start listening to it...soon.

Thanks for a great post. One I'll read over and over.



"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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1/29/12 11:29 P

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Absolutely. I was reading a book about a horse trainer, he had the eye to see what was needed, the soft, gentle voice to calm the horse, and the touch that gave comfort and hope. Those things made him very good at what he did, but his heart is what made the difference. He hurt when they did, he hoped when they had given up, he cared for them with his heart, and used his skills to do so. But the real difference was his heart.

That's us. What sets caregivers apart is their heart. We're not 'better' at this job necessarily than someone else, but what we have is the desire to see our loved ones whole. To make their lives as rich as we can. To ease the pain, help them be what they can. And to do that, we bring into play a whole lot of our other senses. We can smell off odors that hint at bathroom issues, infection, or bathing issues. We hear the tone of their voice, see little gestures that others miss. A look in an eye, a nervous movement, picking at the blankets, a twitch of the foot, that gives us insights into their needs.

Why? Because, like the trainer who spends countless hours with his charges, we have a lifetime's experience with this person. We know what it means when they use a certain tone, or start sprinking profanity into their usually clean speech. We recognize a certain droop of the chin that shows they're sad/lonely, or restless movement that may indicate a need for a trip to the bathroom. It made the trainer a better trainer. It makes us better caregivers.

Sadly, we often forget to use these skills on the rest of the family. We get so stressed out in our caregiving and other roles, we sometimes miss these signs on our other family members. What is your spouse's body language telling you today? Children? Pet?

Pets have a wonderful way of making sure we see their needs. They keep pestering us until we listen. But often, we miss the signs in our other family members. They give up trying to get our attention overtly, and we have to look for more subtle signs.

And how about you? Has your body been sending you signals? What message is your body sending you?

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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FRANANN3's Photo FRANANN3 Posts: 1,317
1/29/12 11:51 A

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I TOTALLY agree! Caregiving IS a GIFT. Even within our own FAMILIES!!! We ARE Blessed to have this gift.

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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
1/29/12 8:38 A

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Yes Judy, I believe it takes a certain kind of person to do that job. You can tell who has the calling and who does not by the care they give and the way they act. Also by the way the patients act towards them.
Good to see you drop in Cookiebakercat. Just love that username.

Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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COOKIEBAKERCAT's Photo COOKIEBAKERCAT Posts: 3,839
1/27/12 3:39 P

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Edited by: COOKIEBAKERCAT at: 9/2/2012 (18:27)
“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

"See You "Lighter"........Cat =^..^=
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1/26/12 8:51 P

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Vicki, so sorry your mom's been sick, you must be exhausted. It's so hard when they don't sleep well.

MOKAY, I hadn't thought about nursing home workers, they're doing all the messy cleanup, and it isn't even their parents! The pay isn't that great, either. It really is a calling, I think. I have a SIL and a niece that specialize in eldercare. The niece's mother was a caregiver, as was SIL's mother. So they saw it first hand, and obviously made a difference in their life.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
1/26/12 12:21 P

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Up almost all night with Mother. She's been getting sick a lot lately, so a trip to her doctor is in the near future, no matter how much trouble/back talk she gives me! I sure wish I could fine a Geriatric doctor on her insurance, but no such luck. :(

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
1/26/12 10:03 A

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Judy,
That was the best thing I have read. It is so true. I would love to copy and give this to some of the folks working at nursing home. Because I know they feel like no ones cares about what they are doing. Some feel as though they are worthless and do not deserve anything because their job is "just cleaning old people". I always tell them that they are worth more then they can imagine. But I think if they could see how this lady put it into words they might understand just how precious they are and how fantastic their work truly is.
Lakotalady, hope you are feeling more rested and may God hold you closer till you feel refreshed.

Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
1/25/12 11:56 P

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I'm here, but that's about all. Just tired, but God will get me through. He always does!!!

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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1/25/12 11:34 P

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I heard a message on the radio yesterday, from a 78 year old woman, about aging. It was so interesting to hear about this from a different perspective. She said she had nothing against nursing homes, but a lot against "dumping" family members there, never to see them again. She told of one woman who had 11 children, who lived in a nursing home for 6 years. In six years, she had NO visits from the family.

Your loved one may be in a facility, but they'd still love calls, visits, notes. Something that tells them that they are loved, wanted. She was a caregiver to her mother, so she knew about this journey. And she said the most amazing thing. You are not really taking care of your mother.

She read from Matthew 25: 34Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:

35For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:

36Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

37Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

38When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

39Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

40And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

She reminded us that this is a special gift that we give our Lord. When we do jobs that seem not to be appreciated, when we are yelled at, or are just tired. When it seems like nothing we do matters. . .remember that every one of those tasks you do are really gifts laid at the Master's feet. They are not just meaningless duties, they are not worthless, they are priceless. They are more than gifts of love to your parents, though they are that. But they are also our way of giving a greater gift to ourselves, to our families, to those around us that need to see that every life has value, and is treasured. And to the Master himself, who loves you and your parents fiercely, and appreciates the love you have so patiently given.

Others may see your time as a homemaker, or parent, or caregiver, as 'worthless' time spent. They have more 'important' things to do. But you have chosen well, caregiver. You have chosen the better path, and will find unexpected rewards. It's hard to realize that when we do even a tiny act of love, we have also done it as unto God. What a tremendous, awesome thing.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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LAKOTALADY's Photo LAKOTALADY Posts: 10,410
1/23/12 9:03 P

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With a tear in my eye, I thank each one of you for the words you just wrote. Yes, we do forget quite often how blessed we are. Silver linings come each and every day. We just tend to make old rags out of them.

Thank you, again, for the wonderful and uplifting words.

emoticon into emoticon That's what God does best in our lives.

"We will be known forever by the tracks we leave."

"When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice."

"Wolves, like the Indian, choose their mates wisely and do not part till death--making the two spiritually entwined."

-:¦:-
´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨)) ¸¸.·´*
((¸¸.·´ ..·´ Vicki-:¦:--:¦:-
-


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1/23/12 8:00 P

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That story brought a smile! I vividly remember my mom holding up her hands in amazement, totally enthralled by these odd things attached to her arms. She had no clue what they were, but wiggled her fingers and found every movement totally amazing. I was amazed to hear your story and realize she was not alone in not knowing what they were.

That's the funny thing about caregiving, you feel so alone sometimes, don't realize that others have travelled and are travelling on the same journey. And that you can help others that have not yet reached your stage in the trek. Such simple little things, stories shared, can mean so much.

Judy
"You can make clothes from the wool of your sheep. . .the goats will provide milk for you and your family" (Proverbs 27: 26, 27)


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MOKAY54's Photo MOKAY54 Posts: 1,426
1/23/12 8:11 A

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Judy that is the best explanation of silver lining I have ever heard. Every word is so true.
The other day mom discovered she had fingers and she had ten. She could not remember what they were called but she had ten. I was so happy that she could add and got the right answer, even if she did not know what they were. Small blessings added together make big blessing.


Slow and steady will see me though to the end.


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