I finaly found some people to talk to on the net. I can't go to meetings. I tried and can't stand it. No one I've met has the control of it that I do, and that's why I realized that I don't have control.
Wow, I can't believe I'm telling everyone this. I can't stand liquor, and I can drink a glass of wine and be fine. One beer = 12-20 every time. I'm very picky about the time of day to start. I show up to work on time and complete my tasks well. I'm not an aggresive drunk (although I do get aggresively optimistic). And to top it off, no one can really tell I've had 18 beers. I can easily refuse a second drink at social events.
BUT, here I am 225 pounds heavier than when it became a regular habit. Houston I think we have a problem!
When I skip a couple of nights, I FEEL like excercising and eating right. It's like the real me is a fitness junkie and the alcohol has that guy bound and gagged( you can see this in my younger photos).
So my journey on Sparkpeople and an alcohol support group have to go hand in hand. Thanks for reading.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body."
There is no true victory without the existence of failure.
| current weight: 403.0