Situations like this are really hard, and you are right about prayer being the only answer. I would like to share a way of praying that I was taught when I most needed it - and it has become a part of my life now whenever someone is being hurtful. I can assure you from personal experience that it is really a very effective way of praying.
Every time the person comes to your mind - as many times a day as that might be - right then and there pray a short mental prayer something like this:
"Dear Lord (or Father or God or however you prefer to address Him), please bless (name of person) with your choicest blessings; fill him (or her) with Your grace, Your love, Your presence. Make him (her) happy, fill him(her) with peace. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen."
Never ask the Lord to change a person in a specific way - it's not up to us to decide how a person should be, or act, or whatever. That's up to God. Just pray that the person be filled with the presence of God and His blessings and gifts.
Not only will this type of prayer give you the peace you need, but just stop and think about it - if that person is filled with the spirit of the Lord, they will inevitably change their way of speaking and acting. Of course, you can also pray for them during your regular prayer time as well.
I have truly seen people totally changed after a few months of praying for them in this way - and of course, they never knew that I was praying for them.
I hope this helps you. Blessings on you, your son, you DIL, and all of your family!
"I sing your praise, God, my King;
I bless your name forever and ever!"
"If you seek Him with all your heart and with all your soul, you shall find Him!" (Dt. 4:29)
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