Posts: 701
12/26/08 1:30 P

Yup, it's a great thing to know and respect your triggers !!! So awesome for you !!

Sorry you had to work on Christmas :(

Take care!

Becca

Posts: 1,213
12/26/08 12:45 A

I worked an 11 hour day and actually barely had time to eat once in that time. It's dangerous for me to think that is a good thing-not eating, so now I'm trying to eat some food that won't be too much before bed, but enough so I don't get ravenous tomorrow. Because then I'll start eating trigger foods and trigger foods will make me binge and then I'll want to possibly purge, and I don't want to do that anymore! So, it's good that I'm recognizing my need to eat even though I don't feel hungry right now.
I love Scrabble!
Tommorrows another day!
Cindy

Posts: 701
12/26/08 12:30 A

Thanks Cindy ...

You actually made me smile through my tears!

Well, I did play a couple of games of scrabble and didn't think about eating or not eating ....

So that's a good thing.

How about you? Did you have any victories today?

Thanks again!

Becca

Posts: 1,213
12/26/08 12:24 A

Those are some pretty high expectations. Find one or two things you did well today, even if they have nothing to do with eating. Your thinking is changing, and you have an awareness of situations that are problematic. Those are really good starting places. It is a process and you are exactly where you need to be. You WILL get there. Be proud of yourself for committing to getting better! You ARE doing awesome!
Cindy

Posts: 701
12/26/08 12:07 A

Hey --

Well, I failed in my objective: to have a normal xmas, drink normally, eat normally. I won't go into details but I feel like a complete .... well, failure sums it up.

I hope you all had a merry Christmas!

I wish so much I could get it right !!!

Take care,

Becca

Posts: 1,213
12/25/08 12:53 A

You Betcha! Never give up! You will get better! I know it.

Posts: 701
12/25/08 12:42 A

Thanks Cindy! It's nice to have some hope when it's Christmas and all !!
Yeah, I've had an eating disorder now for most of my life too. I'm no where near as bad as I once was, so I really should count my blessings!
Merry Christmas to you too and I hope you have a great day! ANd thanks for sending me this note -- it has cheered me a bit!
Becca

Posts: 1,213
12/25/08 12:36 A

I'm sorry you are not doing well. I've had an eating disorder most all of my life in one form or another, compulsive overeating, bulimia, restricting, compulsive over exercising-just keeping trying to get well. I've gone in and out of it, I haven't always engaged in the behaviors, but the food monkey has always been on my back. You will get well. It's so uncomfortable coming out of it and it might not feel like you are making any progress but you are. Hang in there and have a merry christmas.
Cindy

Posts: 701
12/25/08 12:08 A

Merry Christmas everyone!

I haven't been doing very well lately ... I've been struggling a lot with this darn eating disorder, either restricting or binge/purging and I can't seem to get a hold of things. I'm scared. I'm scared for the first time that this disease is really going to kill me. It's killed everything else -- so why not me physically?

In any case ... my hope for tomorrow (Christmas day) is to eat like a normal person. We are having goose for dinner and I want to have dessert and egg nog too. This is my hope.

Merry Christmas to you all !!

Becca