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KRISZTA11's Photo KRISZTA11 SparkPoints: (102,586)
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6/15/17 3:18 A

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Difficult it is!
It took me a while to figure this out. Because where is the mistake in "I'm so tired and I want it" or "it will go wasted if I don't eat this now" or "I just want to eat this right now"? Perfectly true statements.
The thinking mistakes became more obvious to me when I linked these (true) statements with "It is OK to eat this unplanned food because"...
Being tired or hating to waste food does not make eating unplanned food OK.
It has the same consequences, whatever great explanation I find for it.

Eating everything sitting down also helps, because it expands time between sabotaging thought emerging and putting the food in the mouth, and it is easier to catch the thoughts.
If I pop the desired bite in my mouth immediately, there is no time to notice.

Reminds me of my Day 19 It Is Not OK (Stop fooling myself) response card:

Pretending I don't know/notice what I'm eating will not make consequences go away.
A calorie is a calorie, even if
-I'm upset
-I don't care
-I paid for it
-it promises pleasure
-it is Christmas or my birthday
-I'm in a restaurant

... not to mention risk of inducing cravings by eating unplanned food.





Edited by: KRISZTA11 at: 6/15/2017 (03:20)
Kriszta

Goal weight:
58 +- 1 kg /// 128 +-2 pounds
CET (Europe, Hungary)

Maintenance Lessons Learned:
-go on with the healthy lifestyle learned in weight loss phase
-just add healthy foods gradually to stop losing
-work out every day - 30-60 minutes is enough to maintain weight and good mood
-do not try to balance overeating by extreme workouts, it is not going to work
-avoid overeating, instead of satisfaction you get stronger cravings


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GOAL120A's Photo GOAL120A SparkPoints: (16,622)
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6/15/17 1:58 A

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This is a difficult one. What are you thinking right before you want something?
It is usually a smell for me that triggers it. I am not thinking really anything, just yum.. what's that? I want that. . :-)

It is never too late to become who you always wanted to be.


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 7,385
3/29/17 1:56 P

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Day 26: Recognize Thinking Mistakes and writing down most frequent sabotaging thoughts to eat unplanned food or skip exercise.

Maribeth, MN(CST) blc35Panthers9/6 * 5%Casual Travelers *100DWL 7/1-10/9 * Beck 8/1 (8-12 weeks)
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3/27/17 3:17 P

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Day 26 - Recognize Thinking Mistakes
I have more work to do here and probably re-read/revisit this chapter again. But it appears that my thinking mistakes as it relates to eating/food fall in three areas:
Self-deluding thinking,
Justification, and
Unhelpful rules.
It's a lot of work but it can be done!



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YESICAN61's Photo YESICAN61 Posts: 725
3/27/17 12:00 A

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I.can certainly recognize times I have made most of these thinking mistakes. At the moment my big ones are justification and mind reading. I know that this is the case but in the moment it doesn't feel reasonable to stand my ground. Lots of work to do on this.

Any time spent creating is time well spent!





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WALKMAMA's Photo WALKMAMA SparkPoints: (34,248)
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3/26/17 9:53 P

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This is a difficult lesson/chapter for me. I do have every thought listed, too. I am not yet where I want to be with identifying sabotaging thoughts and processing the thinking mistakes with them. The example format that Kriszta shared looks like a good format. This is something I can do when I put my mind to it.

Monica

Central Time Zone


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CHIGGERCANE's Photo CHIGGERCANE SparkPoints: (12,318)
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3/26/17 1:40 P

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every single thought in this chapter applies to me. I need to read this chapter again and again to get to my solution. It all boils down to "what do i really want" and "what am I willing to do to get it".

Deb
Changing my life 1 step at a time.


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3/26/17 1:29 P

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This one bite won't hurt.
I've already done my weekly official weigh-in ... so now I can eat.
Dang, I've had a rough day, week, month ... life ... let's reward ourselves.

I have these still rattling around in my head. This morning after weighing-in ... my brain said you ONLY lost one(1) pound. This isn't working ... let's eat.

emoticon Stay the course. You can do this ... you are doing this.

Cat

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
it's about learning how to dance in the rain.


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GOING-STRONG's Photo GOING-STRONG Posts: 6,808
3/26/17 9:29 A

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Day 26 - Recognize Thinking Mistakes

As I have mentioned before, if I am going to eat something off plan I rarely notice myself thinking about it. I just do. Taking note of what I am thinking is going to take some practice so that I can counter the sabotaging thought. I did notice yesterday that while I was making lunch and chopping up fruit that I wanted a hunk... my thought as I was standing at the sink was "It is perfectly acceptable to have a bite now.. after all it is on my plan and I'm having it for lunch". Instead of eating the bite I should have responded with "No.. it is not acceptable to eat even a bite standing up.. you are just exercising your giving in muscle. You will be sitting and eating lunch in a few minutes and you can wait". I also had a thought when I walked by the nut bowl (which my husband keeps out on the counter.. so nice of him NOT) that I really just wanted a couple. I countered with No, that will strengthen my giving in muscle and you know that it is difficult to stop with just a few. Crunchy salted nuts trigger a craving for more more more.

Rhonda
Seaside, Oregon

Remember...
Eat healthy.. Exercise daily.. repeat! and Consistency.. that is the secret!


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KRISZTA11's Photo KRISZTA11 SparkPoints: (102,586)
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3/26/17 6:03 A

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This chapter starts with a strong statement: "It is important to realize that thoughts are just ideas, not necessarily truths"
Dr. Beck gives us a list of 9 different types of thinking mistakes that make our sabotaging thoughts sound rational and true (which they are not).

Today' assignment is to work with the sabotaging thoughts identified yesterday, and see if there are any thinking mistakes in them.
If you are unsure about how to start, you may scroll down to see posts from previous group readings, these examples may help!

My findings:

Sabotaging thought #1:
A few bites of fresh baguette is not on my food plan, but it is OK to eat them because it is already lunchtime and I'm hungry.
#8 Justification: linking two unrelated concepts - it was true it was lunchtime and I was hungry, but where does it mean it is OK to eat unplanned food? My planned breakfast + lunch + dinner = my total calorie allotment for today. Anything above that is extra.
#3 Overly positive future telling: it is OK = there will be no negative consequences - this is not true, I would eat more than my calorie needs, also probably I would induce cravings

Sabotaging thought #2:
It is OK to eat a few french fries from DH's portion, it will not matter
#6 self deluding thinking: ??? why would it not matter??? thinking "it will not matter " will not reduce number of calories, and giving in to cravings strengthens my giving in muscle.

Sabotaging thought #3:
It is OK to eat remaining meat pieces off the bones of rotisserie chicken, standing in the kitchen.
#6 Self deluding thinking, #3 overly positive future telling: it WILL matter, because it will create cravings -. I'll be fine if I don't do it
#4 emotional reasoning: I believe this is true because I want to do it so much
#7 unhelpful rules: I don't want to waste food, even if it is only a few pieces of meat. Enjoyable but of no nutritional value.

Edited by: KRISZTA11 at: 3/26/2017 (06:10)
Kriszta

Goal weight:
58 +- 1 kg /// 128 +-2 pounds
CET (Europe, Hungary)

Maintenance Lessons Learned:
-go on with the healthy lifestyle learned in weight loss phase
-just add healthy foods gradually to stop losing
-work out every day - 30-60 minutes is enough to maintain weight and good mood
-do not try to balance overeating by extreme workouts, it is not going to work
-avoid overeating, instead of satisfaction you get stronger cravings


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MTN_KITTEN's Photo MTN_KITTEN SparkPoints: (120,391)
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2/15/17 4:01 P

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I have always believed ... change your mind and the rest will follow.

emoticon

Cat

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
it's about learning how to dance in the rain.


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2/3/17 3:26 A

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I can relate, I had to spend some time on this to identify them - but surely they will arise again and you get to catch them!

Kriszta

Goal weight:
58 +- 1 kg /// 128 +-2 pounds
CET (Europe, Hungary)

Maintenance Lessons Learned:
-go on with the healthy lifestyle learned in weight loss phase
-just add healthy foods gradually to stop losing
-work out every day - 30-60 minutes is enough to maintain weight and good mood
-do not try to balance overeating by extreme workouts, it is not going to work
-avoid overeating, instead of satisfaction you get stronger cravings


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MOOMSHINE's Photo MOOMSHINE Posts: 6,002
2/3/17 2:05 A

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Funny, but after reading the chapter, today, I couldn't make thinking mistakes -- could only think about not making them. I know I've made a lot in the past, so I will no doubt make them in the futer. Then, I will re-visit this chapter and write them down. 8-)

8-)
Em
SoCal
Pacific Time Zone
______________________________
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit. Aristotle


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SERIOUSLIM's Photo SERIOUSLIM Posts: 1,943
11/26/16 10:31 P

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emotional reasoning is my main difficulty. It was even difficult to slow down in order to study those thinking mistakes, but i am glad that i am starting to look at them and write responses.
It is going to help me stick to my way of life, even after i have lost all the weight. This is a long term project.

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11/1/16 12:50 A

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Kathleen, it is interesting to realize there are recurring themes, we might not have seen that without doing this exercise. It does make thinking correction easier, correct a main distortion instead of lots of them.

Positive Hope, I like the short word weapons for immediate action too, and I love your list.


I like the list of thinking mistakes and clarification of why it is a mistake. It reminds me of the logic and debate class I took in university. There was a list of debating responses that were dramatic and sometimes effective, clever, fallacious but deceptive, and there was a matching list of tactics to dismantle those responses.

June -- Pacific Time Zone
Where you end up is more important than how fast or where you start out.
- Improved fitness and nutrition, energy and confidence are my rewards.
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
A PH (personal high) is the main goal, a PB is the sometime icing on the cake.
Never underestimate the inevitability of gradualness.
Sopra le nebbie delle valle e le vicende della vita sorge una promessa di luce e serenita.


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KBEHNKE81's Photo KBEHNKE81 Posts: 11,185
10/29/16 1:17 P

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POSITIVEHOPE -
I'm with you: sometimes I need to boil down the 15-minute thought process to a short catch phrase. Here's one that has helped me resist office treats: "Not your food."


**Kathleen
___________
2 Peter 3:9


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10/28/16 10:29 A

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I have my biggest problems with self delusion and emotional thinking. Most of my thoughts revolve around self care and I try to convince myself that I am only being nice to myself because I had deprived myself some time in the past . I am writing out some thorough RC's on these sabotaging thoughts and my thinking mistakes!

Nancy C (Daisy) - Colorado
Life is Good.

"I don't have a runner's body, but I have a runner's heart - and that is all you need. "
Army Sergeant Jennifer Morris, Runner


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10/27/16 2:49 P

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I have fallen for All of those irrational thoughts. I need full body armor to fight back and win this one. I need them to be short, easy to remember and powerful.

These are mine.

Memorize these Thought Responses

NO CHOICE!
Hunger & emotions are NOT emergencies.
Every bite counts!
Oh Well.
Wait 20 min. for satisfaction.
You don't care NOW. You always care tomorrow. Yes, You do care.
Start again immediately!! No stick!
You don't NEED it, you WANT it.
Scale has NO Choice.
Reward myself every week!
Celebrate! Celebration is the energizer I need.


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10/27/16 1:48 P

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I have mentioned what how difficult this part of Beck is for me. My puppy must have wanted to save me from the distress since it was this day and only this day, Day 27 Recognize Thinking Mistakes, that he decided to chew! Thank goodness he didn't destroy he entire page so I am able to make out most of the wisdom Beck has shared with us.

On my previous two Beck attempts I seem to remember that I was brilliant at JUSTIFICATION; I deserve to eat this because *** or It's OK to eat this because ***. I did this just this past Tuesday night when my dad came to dinner. I am Italian and must say I make some awesome Chicken Cacciatore w/ Marinara Sauce. This is a dish we save for the colder months of the year. Our mouths were watering it smelled and looked so good. Once I dove in there was no going back. I had planned on 2 drumsticks, but with some JUSTIFICATION ( I have been so good for 3 weeks now!) I ended up eating 4 drumsticks! I was all downhill from there. As I cleared the table I dug into the pieces of chicken scraps that were still left in the pan with some sauce. One scoop of yummy sauce with each scrap of chicken! And then my dad had brought Apple pie. Store bought. I hate store bought pie. Did that stop me? Noooooo, it did not!

I did feel a tinge of guilt later in the night and vowed to get right back on track.

Sue

Michigan - EST

"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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10/27/16 5:37 A

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My big thinking mistakes are self deluding thoughts: no one will know (as if I don't know!); positive fortune telling ,(I'll eat less at dinner - sometimes I do, sometimes I don't); and emotional reasoning (yesterday's reasoning for an unplanned and untracked cookies was "I resisted until 4:00", "I really want it", & "I'm too tired resist.") At least I know what I was thinking!

Edited by: STRONGDAWG at: 10/27/2016 (05:38)
She believed she could so she did.
- R.S. Grey


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KBEHNKE81's Photo KBEHNKE81 Posts: 11,185
10/26/16 10:44 P

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Following are some thinking mistakes i made in some real-life situations this summer. I posted these thoughts and my responses on the Day 25 thread yesterday. Today I've categorized them.

#1 Sabotaging thought: I'm not happy about the argument going on right now, and I want to feel better, so I'm going to eat all the yummy goodies at the party once we get there.
Thinking mistakes #4 (Emotional Reasoning) and #8 (Justification). Being unhappy does not justify abandoning my plan, and eating in reaction to strong feelings doesn't help process the feelings.

#2 Sabotaging thought: Last time I ordered this kids' meal I got overcharged and I just don't want to have the hassle again, so I'll get a different (higher-calorie, less nutritious) meal.
Thinking mistakes #2 (Negative Fortune Telling), #8 (Justification) and #9 (Exaggerated thinking). Maybe it won't be a hassle this time, it wasn't all that bad a of a conflict last time, and this is not an excuse to eat poorly.

#3 Sabotaging thought: We're at a Steak and Shake, and those burgers look yummy, and I've never had the blackberry/chocolate shake before, so I better have it now because I'll never get this chance again.
Thinking mistake #8 (Justification). So what if I've never had a blackberry/chocolate shake before. It is not woth 875 calories (half my daily calories) no matter how yummy it looks.

Hmm. Seems to be a recurring theme here.

This is not a skill that a person masters in a day. I've revisited this day in the book many, many times and am still learning how to identify the thinking mistakes I'm making. If anyone sees thinking mistakes I missed, please feel free to point them out to me. I'm not above taking some criticism, that's for sure.

**Kathleen
___________
2 Peter 3:9


AZULPAPEL's Photo AZULPAPEL Posts: 207
10/26/16 9:21 P

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My most common thinking mistakes seem to be:

*All or Nothing Thinking - I already blew it; might as well enjoy it!
*Emotional Reasoning - I'm too upset; I just don't care right now.
*Self-Deluding Thinking - This isn't a huge deal; I'll make up the calories some other time.

Self-delusion is easiest to fall into on the average day, while the other two tend to pop up when I'm stressed or on edge.



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10/26/16 2:54 P

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Day 26 done, took my sabotaging thoughts identified yesterday, and identified the thinking mistakes in them. Longish, so wrote a blog about it:
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
ur
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=6257489


Kriszta

Goal weight:
58 +- 1 kg /// 128 +-2 pounds
CET (Europe, Hungary)

Maintenance Lessons Learned:
-go on with the healthy lifestyle learned in weight loss phase
-just add healthy foods gradually to stop losing
-work out every day - 30-60 minutes is enough to maintain weight and good mood
-do not try to balance overeating by extreme workouts, it is not going to work
-avoid overeating, instead of satisfaction you get stronger cravings


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SLENDERELLA61's Photo SLENDERELLA61 Posts: 9,997
7/4/12 3:14 P

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I'm on Day 26 now again. This is my second time to do Beck. I recognize some thinking mistakes I used in the past, but I haven't identified any I am currently using, but I'll be on the outlook.


My Keys to Success = Tracking! Super Foods! Step Up Cardio! And most important: Quit Quitting!!

www.sparkpeople.com/blog/blog.asp?po
st=86_pounds_down_marsha_is_one_active
_grandma


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DRAGON-ROSE's Photo DRAGON-ROSE Posts: 47
4/9/11 10:07 A

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Many of the Thinking Mistakes didn't look familiar to me, probably because I have been specializing in "Excuses". I am not bragging here - I am airing my darkest diet secret. My list of excuses for eating off-plan would fill many pages of my Beck Workbook. But there seem to be some major ones that will knock me right off a diet:
- Special Occasion
- Special Food Available
- Special Night Out
- Tired From Long Day
- Late Night Loneliness

I am targeting each one of these excuses with a special Response Card, and I will print them up today and add them to the seriously useful and powerful cards from Beck.

Now that I know I am able to stop my off-plan eating, I am so excited about this diet! Usually I quit a diet after just a few days. On the rare occasion that I can continue for a few weeks, I tire out and get discouraged, then I quit. But this diet is completely different - I am gaining momentum! Weird, weird, weird. But wonderful!


Your life is not a dress rehearsal, it is the real thing. Do what makes you happy. Do it now.


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so far I've found myself with #2 negative fortune telling, #7 self-deluding thinking, and #9 exaggeration. Very helpful chapter.


My Keys to Success = Tracking! Super Foods! Step Up Cardio! And most important: Quit Quitting!!

www.sparkpeople.com/blog/blog.asp?po
st=86_pounds_down_marsha_is_one_active
_grandma


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I am vowing to have this chapter done by friday I am viewing some of my old comments in 2008. Wow I have been here a long time. I am pretty bad at the mind reading thing and the old post is pretty much the same. I never discredit myself. No hatting on myself. going forward.

Edited by: PURPOSEPOWER95 at: 11/27/2010 (00:21)

Joshua 1:9

Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.

PAT FROM NC


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9/20/10 8:48 P

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I'm most likely to use

#6 self-deluding thinking: If I drink this or eat only one candy, it doesn't count

#8 justification: I'm stressed, I'm sad, I'm unhappy... so I deserve chocolate, chips, french bread to make myself feel better

And a new one of my own: Manana Thinking. I can always buckle down and follow my plan tomorrow. I can get more exercise tomorrow. I can take care of my health and body tomorrow. Manana.

Anuschka
PST - San Francisco Bay Area


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2/6/10 12:59 P

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I am guilty of #1, #4, #8. The concept of identifying the thinking mistake behind the thoughts you have before you eat off plan is excellent.


Annie
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I defined which thinking mistakes I mostly like in my blog so I'm not going to redo that here. I do think this is a good chapter because it gives you another level to look at what you're thinking and why.

"Looks like your expectations let you down. Expectations have a way of doing that." -Pedidiva


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11/20/09 1:56 P

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I do a lot of this one. Keep working on this one.
Cindi

Cindi
Iowa
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Team leader:
Funny, I Don't FEEL 50 (or 60 - it's all good)!
The United Methodist Team.
Sonoma Diet
Social Workers, Counselors and Therapists




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Wow reality bites!
I have perpetuated my irrational beliefs and actions that is why this day is so hard. But this is a good thing facing reality.

I am the Queen of Justifications.

The more honest I am with myself the more I will be able to work on this.

Expect Success

*)
..*) .*)
(.*Stress comes from focusing on problems,
........relief comes from focusing on solutions.

Reward yourself for behaviors, not results.
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2/24/09 7:55 P

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This one is a challenge for me. We all get caught up in the thinking mistakes which perpetuate irrational beliefs. I have to work at these.
Cindi

Cindi
Iowa
Central Time Zone

Team leader:
Funny, I Don't FEEL 50 (or 60 - it's all good)!
The United Methodist Team.
Sonoma Diet
Social Workers, Counselors and Therapists




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This is a skill that I can learn.

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This one was alot. Good Job!

Sandy emoticon

Feeling healthy is much better than ANY food tastes!!!

STG - Have a 4 week streak!


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This one *was* tough! I sort of gave up trying to remember all teh different mistakes and instead am focusing on creating positive thinking habits to replace thinking errors:

i.e. I'm focusing on practicing thinking that's reasonable, logical, honest and self-affirming. Anything that doesn't fit gets tweaked so it does fit.

My ticker represents 12 years of learning and losing and regaining and regrouping - I'm NOT going back! I *AM* and *WILL BE* fit 4 life!!


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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
7/18/08 9:08 P

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Nice analysis! This is a hard one!

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PURPOSEPOWER95's Photo PURPOSEPOWER95 SparkPoints: (114,287)
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7/15/08 11:21 P

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This chapter is overwhelming as some have already said. And the next chapter is a continuation of this one.

I like the idea of breaking some of these that you know you struggle with. I am still learning this thing. (((Smile)))

#3 OVERLY POSITIVE FORTUNE TELLING. I DO SAY OH ONE WILL NOT HURT AND WHEN I'VE FINISHED THE BAG OF WHATEVER... I AM PROVED WRONG.

#8 JUSTIFICATION. YOU HAD A HARD WORKOUT IT WILL NOT HURT YOU..YOU CAN WORK IT OFF. (((((NOT))))

#5 MIND READING I DO WORRY ABOUT OFENDING OTHERS IF I DON'T EAT WHAT THEY OFFER.

I am aware of this because my hd is the worlds worst tempter don't know if he is aware of it or not. It is my ultimate choice to eat what is offered or not. I will have to keep working on this. I will find a nice way to refuse that goodie without hurting his feelings. Treading carefully.

#9 EXAGGERATED THINKING I DO SAY I CAN STAND THIS CRAVING AND GIVE INTO IT.

SO I AM A WORK IN PROGRESS.

Edited by: PURPOSEPOWER95 at: 7/15/2008 (23:34)

Joshua 1:9

Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.

PAT FROM NC


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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
4/1/08 9:35 P

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Good Job, Nus!

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MOV4WARD's Photo MOV4WARD Posts: 10,632
3/29/08 5:21 P

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here's my upshot for day 26 for me :)

i mentally struggled with this... because I found it overwhelming and day 27 looks to be the same. I read it and found myself rebelling at having to learn all this stuff that just seemed "a little more than i want to know" to me...

I'm not sure how important it is to learn what kinds of sabotaging thoughts there are. I do think it's essential to recognize that we have the negative thinking ~ to recognize it when it happens so that we can deal with it effectively.

Even after spending some extra time on this, i am still feeling this way....

I am focusing on just 3 to deal with for now....


emoticon Thinking Mistake #1: All or Nothing Thinking aka black & white thinking... ~ you see things in only 2 categories when there's really a middle ground. (i chose the dice to illustrate not only black & white, but the middle ground. Instead of the #1 or #6, I should shoot for the middle ground #3!!! woo hoo)

for ex: either i'm completely on my diet or I'm off my diet, or
either i'm 100 percent successful or i'm a faiure and may as well give up dieting

this is the important suggestion, aka Helpful Response she provides: Making a mistake is definitely not the same as total failure.

I would add, so get up, dust off and start walking again. Don't use this unplanned over-eating as an excuse to abandon everything and eat with glee and out of control for the rest of your life... until you finally feel miserable and horrible and so over-whelmed that you can't stand it any more and finally decide to climb up off your tukus and try 1 more time on a radical very low calorie diet you can't stand... that leads to more bingeing... Get up now. Dust off and get back to making the best, most healthy kinds of choices you can with the next regular meal or snack. And be kind to yourself.... we all have bad days... forgive yourself, and recognize that you still have a challenge but things will get better as we keep trying :) Hold onto the hope...

My Observation & Comment: not a new one for me but one i persistently struggle with. this was a radical change in approach and thinking, and I still tend to slip into that old black & white thinking... with the same old terrible results... The new approach is much healthier and happier making for me and much more successful.

emoticon Thinking Mistake #2: Discounting the Positive ~ You unreasonably discount your positive actions or qualities (when really I should be giving myself credit for doing well :)

for ex: It doesn't matter if I've lost a few pounds. I deserve credit only after I've lost all the weight I need to lose, or
It doesn't matter if you did well all this week, you ate 1 bite, meal or snack or binge off the diet. What's the point, you blew it and woosh... here comes the self-lashing and emotional self-mutilation and humongo binge...

this is the important suggestion, aka Helpful Response she provides: I deserve credit for every positive thing, aka 2 thumbs up or an atta girl or a WooHoo!!!

i would add: when i do something that is hard, I need to celebrate the success because I chose something that will help me instead of hurt me. It can be a simple mental pat on the back (atta girl) or it can be a little marker like a sticker in my exercise calendar each day I exercised because in the past, i resisted this behavior...

My Observation & Comment: this is something new that I've started since we started the Beck Diet Solution discussions from back when she first introduced the concept. i think this has been enormously helpful to me ~ to help me look forward and focus on the positive changes and benefits... to help me strengthen the new thinking & habits and most importantly, to help me feel positive, pleased and happy with both me and the day today :) It's a keeper!

emoticon Thinking Mistake #3 Dysfunctional (unhelpful) rules ~ You mandate what you (or others) must do without taking circumstances into consideration. (i hate the word rules; i much prefer to create happy making guidelines :)

For example ~ I can't waste food, or
I can't inconvenience my family by cooking healthier meals or getting the junk food out of the house, or
I need to eat what and as much is offered because I can't offend someone by not eating it and taking care of my own needs (my personal favorite excuse/rationalization)

this is the important suggestion, aka Helpful Response she provides: It's better to waste food in the trash than in my body.

I would add that I need to take care of my own needs and priorities instead of being more concerned about other people. Actually, it helps to find what works for both of us. In the past, I focused only on what worked for the other person or group and put my own personal health & eating & exercise needs last. Truly, it is ok to take care of my own needs & priorities too, especially if I do it in a kind and nice but assertive manner or otherwise provide an alternative but suitable accommodation that also works for the other person or group :)

My Observation & Comment ~ this has been an essential change in my thinking for me... and it is easily forgotten &/or abandoned.... as soon as i quit making my own needs a real priority, I begin to put other people's needs first and end up hurting myself. It is ok to take care of me too and all of us together... and that is is happy making for me when I can figure out good happy making solutions (guidelines).

For example, saving the cookie someone gave me for later & thanking them and then tossing it at home or letting someone else eat it.... Or, taking a dish or 2 to a buffet that I can eat & enjoy while still accommodating the intent of the party. Or, asking DH to hide his own treats out of site or to eat his fast food b4 he comes home instead of in front of me which triggers me... In the past, I just didn't want to impose. But finding reasonable solutions helps me to feel like I can do this and it's happy making :)

MAZZYR's Photo MAZZYR Posts: 9,172
3/28/08 8:44 P

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I'm learning to recognize thinking mistakes, and catch thoughts that justify negative behavior with clever arguments by practicing conscious awareness.

Edited by: MAZZYR at: 3/28/2008 (20:44)
Mazzy


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SARAEVANGELINE Posts: 6,717
3/28/08 7:38 A

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I am new to this group. Don't know much about this solution as I am waiting for the book.Nusl8T--Ilike your idea of the devil edgeing us on and we can brush him off. I hope in time he will disappear altogether and I will stay on the right healthy eating track. Bev

Bev. New York State.


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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
3/27/08 8:25 P

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This was an overwhelming chapter. I think alot of it you can't really do until you need it. But I think you're getting the hang of it!

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Feeling healthy is much better than ANY food tastes!!!

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MOV4WARD's Photo MOV4WARD Posts: 10,632
3/27/08 1:38 A

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whew.

this is rather overwhelming, isn't it?

we have a lifetime of irrational negative sabotaging thoughts. Some of them are real habits and some we have identified and dealt with before (waves hand at the all-or-nothing black & white thinking)

I read the thinking mistakes chart/examples and about 1/2 of them really rang true for me. Some I've dealt with, some are new ones like the positive and negative fortune-telling. Predicting what will happen is a new thought for me....

I have been focused on what happened and what I can do next time to make it better, believing that change is possible.

I think this will be a helpful technique that we will be use the rest of our lifetime. I may just take a few now to deal with...

unless someone has a way to stop the incessant chatter of the little devil sitting up there on our shoulder trying to mess up our thinking?

~ ok, i do have 1 trick to share. Telling it no. again and again each time we are faced with the situation... i have found that eventually he forgets to harrass us with that old situation...

don't you just love when you realize an old problem is whipped and no longer a struggle?

I have hope... these things get better and it's better more than not the more pro-actively and effectively I learn to deal with this stuff :)

Edited by: MOV4WARD at: 3/27/2008 (01:38)
MAZZYR's Photo MAZZYR Posts: 9,172
1/27/08 9:51 A

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I need to practice being aware of my thoughts before I eat when the desire to eat conflicts with my meal plan. For me when I think the thought "I really want it" my antennas start to go up. If I really want it I go into tune out mode, and bypass the justification thought or other thinking mistake. For me the initial thought "I really want it" is where I have been trying to be firm and decisive with the responses NO CHOICE... IT'S NOT OKAY or OH, WELL.

Mazzy


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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
1/27/08 6:38 A

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It really does help to see where we've gone astray in the past, so history doesn't repeat itself! Good Job!!

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HAPPYWALKER's Photo HAPPYWALKER Posts: 1,836
1/26/08 9:35 P

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When I think "I really want it..I HAVE to have it", that's an example of exaggerating thinking.

When I think "(poor me) I should be able to eat whatever I want", that's a combination of emotional reasoning and justification.

Then I'll say to myself, "I won't be able to stand it unless I eat this", which is negative fortune telling and exaggerated thinking.

Another big one is "It doesn't matter if I did well the past few days, I already blew it today by giving in once, I might as well have another" - that's all or nothing thinking and discounting the positive.

Starting to pay attention to my thoughts and then realizing that my thinking is distorted and faulty helps me see how in the past I've made it easy to give in to my desire to overeat and then give up completely on my diet.

Mary



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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
12/30/07 7:48 A

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Mazzy - I like how you put exerpts from the book on the thread; we can all review with you then! Keep up the good work!!

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MAZZYR's Photo MAZZYR Posts: 9,172
12/30/07 6:41 A

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Quoting Dr. Beck:

"Once I can readily see the mistakes in my thinking, dieting will be easier."

When I notice sabotaging thoughts, I'll identify the thinking mistakes that go with them.

Thinking Mistake #8: Justification

Sabotaging Thoughts: I really want it!
Mmmm that looks good!
Mmmm that smells good!
It's not that fattening!
Nuts... I want
Cheese. I want

Thinking Mistake #9: Exaggerated Thinking

Sabotaging Thoughts: Oh screw it!

It's interesting to examine my thinking mistakes and realize my sabotaging thoughts.

Edited by: MAZZYR at: 12/30/2007 (06:45)
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MAZZYR's Photo MAZZYR Posts: 9,172
11/11/07 5:44 P

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#8: Justification
I deserve to eat this because...
It's okay to eat this because...

#9: Exaggerated Thinking
I can't stand this craving.
I have no willpower.



Mazzy


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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
9/25/07 9:14 P

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Quoting Mary "Realizing these are thinking mistakes and not personality defects I can deal with them." I like that thought. There's nothing wrong with us, just the way we're thinking! Very Good!!

I tend to be all or nothing, too. We can't be perfect so this is an impossible mission. Now I try to just do what I can and be happy with that.

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Edited by: FINDINGSANDY at: 9/25/2007 (21:16)
Feeling healthy is much better than ANY food tastes!!!

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PEANUTBUTTER14's Photo PEANUTBUTTER14 Posts: 214
9/25/07 6:51 P

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mom2two, you and I have the same number one thinking mistake.
#! I have always been all or nothing. My way or the highway or whatever you want to call it. I hate that. Its just like when I walk, I have to walk every day, I tell myself take a day off but its so hard. I get so set in my ways and of course no one can be perfect forever so when I fall I fall hard. I am trying not to be do or die but it is hard for me. This is the biggest mistake that I have always made.
#9 Justification Its free I got to eat it. I did this in the past but not today, there was free pizza and bagels at school. I didn't even look at them except when the guy next to me was stuffing them down. There is no free food for me. All food has calories and all food counts.
Realizing these are thinking mistakes and not personality defects I can deal with them. I certainly know that I am not perfect, not now or ever.
Mary

 
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MOM2TWO!'s Photo MOM2TWO! Posts: 218
9/21/07 1:58 P

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#1 The all or nothing thinking. I think I have to be perfectly at 100% all the time.

#2 Negative fortune telling. I think of this as negative self talk.

#8 Justification "Because I'm so stressed out." Better to address the stress.

#9 Exaggerated thinking "I have not willpower." That is giving food power it does not have. The fasting day dispelled this thinking mistake.

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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
9/21/07 6:23 A

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Excuse: I'm stressed/bored/lonely/sad
Thinking: #4 Emotional reasoning

Excuse: It's a special occassion, it's ok to eat!
Thinking: #8 Justification

Excuse: I deserve to treat myself.
Thinking: #8 Justification

Excuse: I'll never lose weight anyway.
Thinking: #2 Negative Fortune Telling

Some of these could actually fall into several categories. It's funny how we delude ourselves into thinking that this makes sense but when you step back and look at it objectively, you see how ludacris it is.

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FINDINGSANDY's Photo FINDINGSANDY Posts: 5,757
9/16/07 8:25 P

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Which of the Nine Thinking Errors do you struggle with?

Feeling healthy is much better than ANY food tastes!!!

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