I can only say, I hear you. It's interesting, isn't it, that we're kind of fed a bill of goods about what will make us happy, empowered, etc? There's a lot of myth about the partner, the weight, the job, the lifestyle - whatever - that will make us happy. Then we attain whatever it is, and - to quote some song lyrics - no matter where I run I meet myself there. Being happy in your own skin - literally & figuratively - is quite the challenge. But isn't the journey interesting!?! We support you, we understand what you're saying, and we share the journey.
Some people think the “plant-based whole foods diet” is extreme. Half a million a year will have their chests opened up and a vein taken from their leg and sewn onto their coronary artery. Some people would call that extreme. - Dr. Caldwell B. Esselstyn, “Forks Over Knives”
Fitness Minutes: (93,041) Posts: 12,475 10/10/12 7:04 P
After any mountain top experience there's going to be the descent to the valley. You have met and mastered some big challenges. Now that you have time to reconnoiter make a list of at least 10 things you are thankful for. So often we take for granted the little things. Then do some soul searching as how you might be a blessing to others with your talents. I believe you will find the fulfillment you are seeking.
Hi TOTALGYMJUNKIE, I think you've come a long way just in the choices that you've made to live a healthier lifestyle! Be proud of these accomplishments! But it's not a bad thing to continue to want more for your hard work. Perhaps you could try different types of work outs to see if they make more of impact that you're looking for. For instance, if you're currently not lifting weights, try a strength training DVD or a circuit training class. Sometimes just trying something new creates a spark within us, that creates a new kind of happiness.
There is no passion in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living. ~ Nelson Mandela
Always do what you're afraid to do ~George Bernard Shaw
current weight: 137.6
Fitness Minutes: (172,511) Posts: 1,548 10/10/12 4:56 P
What I heard from your account was how good a brisk walk was - for the mental health, too. That you started there and many changes of nutrition and movement were added to your life. I respond to the idea of adding primarily rather than subtracting things when making big changes. I'm hearing that you've made enormous shifts while leading a very full life. That's huge. You write, "The realization that some of the damage I've done to my body has left its scars..." Yeah, me. too. Personally, I like scars that are only as deep as the body. They tie us to our own history, where we have been. The deeper ones, the often invisible ones, scare me. Something I try to do myself is to think what can I do to further this odyssey towards health and wellness rather than thinking of flaws which need to be eliminated. When I think about bettering my health, I think about not just diet but movement (and what for movement), time spent in the natural world, time spent with family, friends, deep sleep, ways to lessen stress (meditation?), giving, and feeling gratitude. This is your life. You've done so much. There is pleasure and vitality to be had in good health. Time to celebrate.
Fitness Minutes: (11,261) Posts: 514 10/10/12 4:48 P
Losing weight doesn't change our personalities or get rid of emotional problems or cure cancer. It just makes us slender and healthier. That's a lot. It lowers our blood pressure, reduces cholesterol, and can even get type two diabetics off meds. That's a lot, isn't it? So we have some sagging skin. We can get rid of that by gaining the weight back. : ) We will probably be treated better by people who would rather hire a thin person than a fat person for a job but, the majority of people will treat us the same way as they did when we were fat. Some single people might get more dates and some married people might have a spouse who becomes insecure but, by in large, most of us won't see an increase in friends or a change in our social lives. But, you've lost 60 lbs! And,you are thinner, and you are healthier. If you want more friends, go out and make some. If you want to get rid of depression or insecurity, call up Dr. Phil. If you hate your job, try to get another one. But never forget, you are skinnier and healthier!
current weight: 156.5
Fitness Minutes: (75,182) Posts: 2,311 10/10/12 4:48 P
I agree with Boni and Topsail. You are too hard on yourself. You accomplished a great deal in a year. Those last few pounds are a drop in the bucket to what you have already lost. AND muscle weighs more that fat. I don't use scales. I gauge my weight loss on what size jeans I wear. From 1X to size 10 in a little over a year.
I make all my vegan food from scratch . I learned to make vegan sausage links, tempeh and tamales! Without soy, I'm not a big fan of tofu. I like the fact that making food items like that myself, I know exactly what I am putting in my body. My carnivore hubby eats some of the things I make and likes some of them. There may be hope for him yet!
"Adam fell that men might be, and men are that they might have joy."
You are being too hard on yourself! It sounds to me like you are doing great! I wish I could say the same. Think how far you have come & how much you have accomplished! You might be so close to your goal, you are getting nervous. You are just having a blue day. Make a list of everything you have done & celebrate your weight loss & strength. I love to say I had lost 60 pounds! Way to go!!!!
Pounds lost: 0.0
Fitness Minutes: (25,983) Posts: 4,174 10/10/12 4:25 P
We tend to dwell on the negatives instead of the positives. Look at all the amazing things you have accomplished. It takes a person of strength to complete this journey called life and there isn't one of us who hasn't the scars to show for it. Embrace them as battle-won.
Boni Co-Leader Vegan Fitness and Nutrition
"There are no shortcuts to anywhere worth going." Anon "Finishing is winning." "Treat everone you meet as if they have a sign around their neck, "Make me feel important."
current weight: 124.8
Fitness Minutes: (490) Posts: 17 10/10/12 4:13 P
I've spent my entire adult life at the same weight--not a good one--but I felt comfortable in my own skin. I started my weight loss journey in October 2011...sort of by accident. I started walking to combat the stress of raising four crazy kids while enrolled in college full time (better late than never, right!? And isn't it amazing what a fast-paced walk with an ipod can do for your mental state! Who knew?) Anyway, I started to not want that 4th or 5th slice of pizza (who has time to cook!?) because I'd lose my feel-good "high" from all the sweating I did that day. Fast forward 6 months....and I'm creating 100% vegetarian meals from scratch for my family daily. (Yup, I finished school. Yay for free time!) Fast forward 6 more months...I'm swapping clothes with my 8th grade daugher & friends and have happily given up my cozy reading area in my bedroom for a home gym. Today I am 60 pounds lighter. I wear skinny jeans & am even sporting a tattoo! (Ok, three tattoos.) Sounds like a success story, right? (And in some ways it is.) But I'm more unhappy with my body than I have ever been!!! I see the flaws so clearly now. To be honest, there are a lot of them. The realization that some of the damage I've done to my body has left its scars was a tough pill to swallow. I'm trying to remain positive during these last 14 pounds, but it's hard. I thought losing weight would make me happy & give me the body I've always wanted. Well, here I am...at a healthy weight for the first time in my adult life & I'm still just me. Where's the sexy, confident woman I thought I'd find under all those fat rolls!? Looking for someone to normalize my feelings! Please!?
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