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TANSHAN1's Photo TANSHAN1 Posts: 26,573
2/8/08 10:43 P

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Ladies, we need to live in the moment because ,trust me, you never know when you don't get any more moments...My heart attack in Sept. made me realize there is a lot of living I want to do and I just might not have time to wait until I'm a size 12 to do this stuff. Live in the moment ladies and do it because you love and respect yourselves and the haters can just kiss your hiney!!

tanshan
Peace my lettuce leaf,
Shannon
"THE Sexxy Strapless Strawberry"


If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance,
Baffle them with Bulls*t!!

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REDE2CHANGE Posts: 41
2/8/08 4:00 P

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Girls, if you want to dance, then get out there and dance! Don't let anyone tell you that you are too big to have a good time. Chances are, whoever is snickering isn't that great a dancer. If they were, they wouldn't need to divert attention to us. We all deserve to have fun and do what we love, so put on your finest duds and get your butt on the dance floor!

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MEJIASLADY's Photo MEJIASLADY Posts: 910
2/8/08 1:28 P

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Yeah...being the big one really does suck! My sister and partner in crime is a size 3...and a gorgeous blonde to boot! Now the sad part is up until three years ago..I was the same! So we used to get tons of attention everywhere we went...we were both in great shape, blonde and loud and fun...but now she is still the same and I am invisible...I am now 100 pounds overweight and the only thing the same is the blonde hair. She doesnt get it why I wont go out dancing anymore because she knows I love it...she doesnt see my size, she sees me which is great but its especially hard being compared to her!I always feel like the ugly, fat sister. One jerk even told me..."wow it must have been hard growing up with such a beautiful sister..." it just amazes me how people can just open there mouths and say whatever they are thinking without regards to how someone may feel! I cannot wait until I get some of this weight on and can get out there and shake my booty! WOOOO thanks to all of you who understand and get it! God Bless! Felicia

"


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LINDOKAS's Photo LINDOKAS Posts: 7,978
2/8/08 1:22 P

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IRENESUE27, nobody here can give you the confidence that you need to go out there and not care about the pointing. Honestly, I am always the biggest girl out there (just look at my ticker!), but I just try to play dumb. I'll admit, I'm not a shy person at all, so if someone teases me to a great degree, they are almost always confronted. By the end, they either leave afraid to ever tease anyone again or we end up having drinks together!

I didn't always have confidence in myself, but if you slowly start acting like you do, you start to see that people react to that and treat you with more respect. Your confidence tends to grow as a result from there... It's a cliche, but no one can love you or respect you unless you do so for yourself first!

Much love to you
Linda :-)

Edited by: LINDOKAS at: 2/8/2008 (13:23)
Linda :-)


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NIKSLOSTIT's Photo NIKSLOSTIT SparkPoints: (0)
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2/7/08 10:06 P

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... Being the fat chick on the dance floor... I work at a strip club... talk about realizing your weight compared to everyone else! Now I am just a waitress but still, it matters. The thing that I have noticed is that NO matter how big you are or you feel you are there is ALWAYS another girl out there with you, who feels exactly the same way. I have had girls who are obviously smaller than me look at me and tell me how gorgeous I am and what an awesome body I have... So I am going to go ahead and say that you are the girl you perceive yourself to be.

So lets not be the fat chicks anymore... lets all be the hot chicks!!!

emoticon

~Nikkie~


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READY4MO's Photo READY4MO Posts: 3,766
2/7/08 4:26 P

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I am ready! emoticon

~*Monique*~
"Yes I can!"


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FINDINGNIA Posts: 747
2/7/08 2:15 P

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OMG im so happy i joined this group
i read through this thread and i get all teary eyed with all the support that i read from everyone

Lets all dance together woohoooooooooooooooooooooo
emoticon emoticon emoticon

*Nia*

*Make the decision, then do something - no matter how small - toward accomplishing what you want.* ~ Author Unknown


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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
2/7/08 1:54 P

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Ok that's it...we are setting a date to go dancing together...

Betcha betcha...i can see my girls dancing here on the beach...

LIGHT BULB!!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

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GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
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READY4MO's Photo READY4MO Posts: 3,766
2/7/08 12:56 P

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IRENESUE27 it is unfortunate that your husb dosen't give you positive feedback. My husb dosen't either. But instead of looking for comments from him I just don't expect or ask him anything having to do with my weight loss. I know that I am loosing the weight because I can see it and I feel so much better now. I used to go dancing before I got married and I miss it alot.

~*Monique*~
"Yes I can!"


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PAINTBALLDIVA72's Photo PAINTBALLDIVA72 Posts: 1,393
2/6/08 6:04 P

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Hell if some guy did that to me I would take him out myself!! lol....course my hubby would be sitting there watching and say "buddy you just messed with the wrong chick!" But knowing my hubby who you don't mess with would probably step in.

Yeah if someone has to say that to someone then they are LOW!! We are much better then that girls!!

You should have turned around and said "Honey it's ok...I don't mind dancing with a jacka$$ heehaw heeehaww!" Then see what the guy would have done. hehehehe




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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
2/6/08 5:26 P

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Lots of love around here Miss Tawny Girl

It's ok to cry we have strong shoulders and lots of kleenex

emoticon

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

GOYAAM!
GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
teams.sparkpeople.com/GOYAAM


Spread The Spark!
EACH ONE REACH ONE...
teams.sparkpeople.com/SpreadTheSpark

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/tell_a_f
riend.asp


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ELLE_2012's Photo ELLE_2012 Posts: 473
2/6/08 5:22 P

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awww...I almost teared up! Audie you are the sweetest!
This is my favorite team by far!

(and Maureen...my hubby, Chance, well he's an UFC loving boy, he'd have loved to give them a redneck lesson! ;) LOL)

Edited by: ELLE_2012 at: 2/6/2008 (17:21)
"There is no elevator to success, you have to take the stairs."


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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
2/6/08 5:16 P

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emoticon Welcome Tawny Girl

You know I love MY Audie but deep down some little part of me...some voice...probably that Jersey Girl coming out that says...

Let the Hubbie Take Him Out to the Parking Lot... emoticon hehehe

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

GOYAAM!
GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
teams.sparkpeople.com/GOYAAM


Spread The Spark!
EACH ONE REACH ONE...
teams.sparkpeople.com/SpreadTheSpark

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/tell_a_f
riend.asp


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AUDIE40220's Photo AUDIE40220 SparkPoints: (17,136)
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2/6/08 4:59 P

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Tawny....
He had the problem. I think it is great that you are getting healthy and taking care of yourself! That is wonderful and I applaud you! Queen take care of yourself! But that "kid" was disrespectful to you to start out! He had the problem and just the fact that he was trying to dance with you inappropriately indicates that it did not matter if you were slim or not...he would have found something to further disrespect you. You could have been a perfect 10 with red hair and he would have made fun of your hair color. What I am saying is in situations like this the problem is not with you---not even your size---the problem is with that person. People are going to laugh and make fun of something even if we were all perfect because we live in a world where a lot of people feel inferior and to make themselves feel better they have to put someone down. He started out disrespecting you and his comment just concluded his actions.
Loose weight to be the best you for you and for your husband! Go dancing and pay no attention to the unnecessary people around.....it's you and your man in you all's (Oklahoma slang) world!
Keep your head up and reach your goal! You got this thang girl. You are on center stage staring in your own drama! At the end we will stand and applaud the new healthy you that comes out for the encore!
I encourage you and I hope that you didn't listen or allow that boys comment to make you feel bad about your beautiful self!

Edited by: AUDIE40220 at: 2/6/2008 (17:05)
Lord teach me to be a WOMAN OF GRACE witha HEART of COMPASSION, an ATTITUDE of MERCY, and a DISPOSITION of HUMILITY.


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ELLE_2012's Photo ELLE_2012 Posts: 473
2/6/08 4:42 P

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hi i'm new here and just wanted to add...

I UNDERSTAND!! My husband about punched someone. Some guy came up to me on the dance floor and was dancing dirty with me and my husband told him to knock it off. and the guy goes 'i'm not afraid to dance with a fat girl!'
which ticked my husband off to the point where he saw red. i'm lucky b/c my hubby thinks i'm beautiful, but at the same time i know the truth. I'd love to be the sexy dancer i used to be. not the joke of some dumbass college kid.
*sigh* oh well, i'm down 12 pounds and on my way!

Lets all dance and not care what they say!!

Edited by: ELLE_2012 at: 2/6/2008 (16:44)
"There is no elevator to success, you have to take the stairs."


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TANSHAN1's Photo TANSHAN1 Posts: 26,573
1/30/08 8:25 P

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Audie, You are such an elevator of spirits...and you are so right...let'em watch!! Love ya girl...and just in case nobody told you today...You are one sexxy queen!

Shannon

tanshan
Peace my lettuce leaf,
Shannon
"THE Sexxy Strapless Strawberry"


If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance,
Baffle them with Bulls*t!!

teams.sparkpeople.com/DoneGirls

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PAINTBALLDIVA72's Photo PAINTBALLDIVA72 Posts: 1,393
1/30/08 5:07 P

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I second that Audie!!!

You couldn't have said it better!
And you are right.....we are Queens. And if people want to watch...enjoy the show baby.

Love ya!!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
1/30/08 4:27 P

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emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

I am a work in progress and my hips might be a bit bigger than they should but I can swing them all the same.....if you need to watch it happen so be it I hope you enjoy it. Because baby...these hips have swirl and soul....and can hit a beat that raise you out of your seat.....if you let them....

PRAISE GOD I LOVE YOU AUDIE

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

GOYAAM!
GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
teams.sparkpeople.com/GOYAAM


Spread The Spark!
EACH ONE REACH ONE...
teams.sparkpeople.com/SpreadTheSpark

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/tell_a_f
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AUDIE40220's Photo AUDIE40220 SparkPoints: (17,136)
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1/30/08 3:32 P

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Hey Sistahs!
How is everyone's day! Listen you are all beautiful women. You are Queens' in your palaces ruling your worlds. I don't know if your kings forgot to remind you that you are unique, special, and wonderful. I don't know if you have a king or that your best girlfriend forgot to tell you but you are incredible. Who cares if the world watches, stares, snickers, or even laughs.....watch me live and enjoy my life! Watch me love myself...watch me be the best me that I can be. I am a work in progress and my hips might be a bit bigger than they should but I can swing them all the same.....if you need to watch it happen so be it I hope you enjoy it. Because baby...these hips have swirl and soul....and can hit a beat that raise you out of your seat.....if you let them.......Love yourself....enjoy yourself....take care of yourself....and let the world watch if they want.....but don't let it stop you from being you. Girls go dancing and let the beat capture you and make you jamm like you haven't jammed before! Get down, get down with yo' bad self!

Lord teach me to be a WOMAN OF GRACE witha HEART of COMPASSION, an ATTITUDE of MERCY, and a DISPOSITION of HUMILITY.


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MIREYASMAMA's Photo MIREYASMAMA Posts: 81
1/29/08 3:39 P

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I hear all of you who have felt like the 'giant' in the group of thin, petite girls. It's no fun. I find that some people will stare and whisper or snigger and others can't even see me - it's like my size makes me a 'non person'. I am invisible, especially when it comes to getting service in a store, well not all stores but definitely stores where a young guy is behind the counter. I never go back.

"Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go"

"The most important person to be honest with is yourself"


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IRENESUE27's Photo IRENESUE27 Posts: 8
1/22/08 4:26 P

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Well Ladies I went out Saturday nite to have a drink with some friends and there was some good music playing. Of course my stick friend tried to drag me out to go dancing. I went reluctantly and enjoyed it until I saw people pointing & whispering. I do okay until I see that kind of nonsense. I don't know anymore. I get so upset with it but it doesn't push me to try harder to lose the weight either...why is that????

Never judge a book by its cover!!!


 
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INDYPNDT1's Photo INDYPNDT1 Posts: 372
1/21/08 7:25 P

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Thanks guys! I'll let you know how it goes next week.

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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
1/21/08 4:05 P

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That's it HappyBunny

If they dance with you it will be the best dance of their life emoticon

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

GOYAAM!
GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
teams.sparkpeople.com/GOYAAM


Spread The Spark!
EACH ONE REACH ONE...
teams.sparkpeople.com/SpreadTheSpark

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/tell_a_f
riend.asp


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PAINTBALLDIVA72's Photo PAINTBALLDIVA72 Posts: 1,393
1/21/08 2:42 P

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HAVE FUN!

Dance your heart out. Think of all the calories your burning and the good cardio!

And if people want to watch let them. Don't let them ruin your night. I know when I go to dance clubs I have to have a couple drinks in me first before I go dance but I do it. And if people are going to watch me then their night must be pretty boring!!

Hmmmm....next time I go and people are watching I should walk over to them and say "Come on get out there and dance!!"




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
1/21/08 1:39 P

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When you dance...remember that I MoeDancing am with you...be not afraid

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

GOYAAM!
GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
teams.sparkpeople.com/GOYAAM


Spread The Spark!
EACH ONE REACH ONE...
teams.sparkpeople.com/SpreadTheSpark

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/tell_a_f
riend.asp


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INDYPNDT1's Photo INDYPNDT1 Posts: 372
1/21/08 1:30 P

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I was just reading this topic thinking oh wow how awesome would it be to have that attitude. Then it hit me, we're having a work party this weekend and I'm sure they'll be dancing since we're getting a DJ. After reading everyone's thoughts I'm going to try my best to dance how I want to dance and with who I want to dance this weekend. Cross your fingers I don't chicken out.


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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
1/20/08 1:31 P

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I'm listening to you girl and saying Amen Sista

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

GOYAAM!
GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
teams.sparkpeople.com/GOYAAM


Spread The Spark!
EACH ONE REACH ONE...
teams.sparkpeople.com/SpreadTheSpark

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/tell_a_f
riend.asp


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IRIEGAL's Photo IRIEGAL SparkPoints: (0)
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1/20/08 1:28 P

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IreneSue, I totally understand! I was at a friend's bachelorette party last night and I love my girlfriends but they are all very thin and petite. I look like a freakin GIANT next to them. I mean, a real GIANT. And we were out dancing and I love dancing and frankly, I feel like I'm a good dancer. And I totally feel like people were watching (ahem) staring at me. Actually, I think my best friend (who is gorgeous) told off some guy who was making fun of me... she would never admit that, but I'm almost positive that's what happened. And yeah, it hurts and I won't lie, it's part of what drives me but honestly- it's a small part. I am changing my life for me because I want to be healthy and be the person that I feel I can be. I want to dance with my girlfriends at a club and not get all sweaty after 3 songs. I want to climb 2 flights of stairs and not be out of breath. I want those things not because of how people judge me but because I just want them. But I hear you, it hurts. What I do, is I just do my best to zone them out...not always easy and enjoy the friends I'm with and dance the night away. I will not allow some loser in a club to ruin my night!

Rox
~Believing I am worth it will lead to my freedom~





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MOEDANCING's Photo MOEDANCING Posts: 4,992
1/19/08 7:25 P

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Watch Out Ladies... emoticon

MOEDANCING is in da house...

Ladies Ladies If we are gonna really be Done With Being The Fat Girl...we need attitude adjustments...
People who snicker and laugh are LOSERS...

We (Me) are gonna get you ladies dancing...no matter where you are...if you feel like dancing YOU BETTER DANCE...Follow me down the yellow brick road.

I AM A BIG MEAN DANCING MACHINE...and if you are lucky enough to be my partner...You will have the best dance of your life. emoticon

Now having said all that...

What's on Your Playlist?

Maureen

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Anais Nin

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu

GOYAAM!
GET OFF YOUR AHEM AND MOVE!
teams.sparkpeople.com/GOYAAM


Spread The Spark!
EACH ONE REACH ONE...
teams.sparkpeople.com/SpreadTheSpark

www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/tell_a_f
riend.asp


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PAINTBALLDIVA72's Photo PAINTBALLDIVA72 Posts: 1,393
1/19/08 2:54 P

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Hey.....I totally understand!!

Believe me....both things bother me....1. I love to dance oh my do I love to dance!! and 2. no support from husband. I am so fed up with him that I basically said "screw it...you don't want to make a change then be fat, I don't want to be fat anymore!" He is slowly coming around but he erks me sometimes I could just bop him!

I work out at Curves 6 days a week and what does he do....nothing. He even has a gym at the place he works and only pays $6 a month to use it! I would be heaven!! I even bought him a weight set for xmas....and he actually is using it. But the cardio part I can't his butt moving! grrrr

You need to have fun and if people are going to look...let them..they aren't worth it. I know it's hard, trust me, but maybe they are looking at you in a positive way...did you ever think of that? I am trying really hard to not think negative about when people look at me but yes it is hard especially when you have dealt with negative reactions for your whole life. I actually had a friend yell at me last week because I reacted like people were slamming me and she said "what if they were looking at you and thinking wow what a sexy lady" I just laughed at her but it's true!

Keep your chin up sweety....it will get better. And you know...if you keep at it your husband may join you someday for a workout or say "you know honey...you look really good...I am proud of you". Hopefully he says that now. But you gotta do it for YOU and your kids. Show them how strong you are.

You can do this! I have faith in you. We all do...and we are here for support. You aren't alone in this battle and you will always have someone to lean on here at Sparks.

emoticon Robyn


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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TANSHAN1's Photo TANSHAN1 Posts: 26,573
1/19/08 2:03 A

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We have all heard the term "Dance Like No One is Watching" wellll, pretty hard to do when you feel like you are taking up the dance floor space of 4 "normal" people. Although, I haven't decided whether it is worse to stared at or ignored. Both hurt me, my confidence and self esteem.
Irenesue27, let me tell you...I do understand! My journey toward health and weight loss is not for "those people" but for myself. Admittedly, some of the (devilish) inspiration comes from seeing the look on some of those faces that either ridiculed me or ignored me though. The future image of that helps keep me on that blasted recumbent bike.
Keep posting and reading posts, they help. We are all here to cheer you on your way!
Shannon

tanshan
Peace my lettuce leaf,
Shannon
"THE Sexxy Strapless Strawberry"


If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance,
Baffle them with Bulls*t!!

teams.sparkpeople.com/DoneGirls

https://secure.choosehope.com/commer
ce/catalog.jsp
IRENESUE27's Photo IRENESUE27 Posts: 8
1/18/08 11:31 P

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Hey everyone! I am tired of going out and being the fat chick on the dance floor with thin/healthy friends. I hate that people stare at me, not because I'm pretty but because I'm a large woman with thin friends. I haven't been out dancing in years, scared of having people stare at me. Help I really do need support, I'm not getting positive feedback from hubby, so I need friends that understand.

Never judge a book by its cover!!!


 
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