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AJDOVER1's Photo AJDOVER1 SparkPoints: (295,098)
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7/2/15 1:38 P

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Hi Stephanie! it's great to meet you. emoticon

Let's walk!


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10_TOES's Photo 10_TOES Posts: 130
7/1/15 11:53 A

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Hi! Glad you're here with us.

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PINKD333's Photo PINKD333 Posts: 409
7/1/15 11:39 A

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My name is Stephanie and I am an addict. I say that so much now that can barely introduce myself without adding "and I'm an addict." emoticon

I have been clean since 2/9/10. I live and love the recovery life.

I am 49 years old, will be 50 soon and still on many days feel like a kid.

I have 2 kids, ages 23 and 14, married to a recovering addict. We used together for 30 years and got clean together. (almost, I am 3 months ahead of him which is a relapse preventative itself, we are competitive, I like having more clean time emoticon

I am trying to apply recovery to a healthy lifestyle. I looked at my pattern when I was just doing it alone, the scale was all that mattered and my pattern was gain, lose, gain, lose, gain lose. It was like using. Quit, Relapse, Quit, Relapse, Quit, Relapse. You see the similarities.

So this time I am doing all the things, talking to my Higher Power, remembering what I want will usually kill me, building a network, and now joining a group of addicts to hang with online.

My life is really good since I got clean. No complaints today but glad to be here on the not so great days!

emoticon

Stephanie



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-WISPY-'s Photo -WISPY- Posts: 27,206
4/11/15 9:15 P

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Hi Donna. Hope you feel better soon. Ive been spending a bit of time there lately myself. :)

Enjoy your weekend.

"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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DRADISCH's Photo DRADISCH Posts: 3,754
4/11/15 1:52 P

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Thank you so much. It feels great to be here. sorry I missed yesterday, at the doctors. A bit under the weather with a virus.
It is truly nice to hear your stories too. Have a Blessed Day

I wish we could put up some of the Christmas spirit in jars and open a jar of it every month. ~Harlan Miller

Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. ~Emilie Coue

The best
thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time.
- Abraham Lincoln

Live your life from your heart. Share from your heart. And your story will touch and heal people's souls.
-- Melody Beattie


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AJDOVER1's Photo AJDOVER1 SparkPoints: (295,098)
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4/9/15 4:27 P

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It's good to see you here, Donna!
emoticon

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-WISPY-'s Photo -WISPY- Posts: 27,206
4/8/15 7:23 P

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Hello Donna, so happy you have joined us. I too had suffered from abuse and as I uncovered it - so much I had stuffed down with food, sex and alcohol began to come to light when I went to therapy. Did this after I had been sober a while thanks to AA and discovered that being sober allowed me to experience memories of the stuff I never wanted to think about. Therapy was great, as was joining a Victim Support Group. I began to realise I was not alone, and that my whole personality fitted into the profile of a person who has experienced abuse. This allowed me to feel as if I belonged to the human race.

I am now 75 and still have times with food. Spark people has somehow given me a way of eating that is something I can sustain in maintenance. I allow myself a celebration day. Not a cheat day - that would make me feel bad. I have a celebration day and that stops me feeling deprived. I count it into the food for my week.

Look forward to getting to know you. emoticon



"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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DRADISCH's Photo DRADISCH Posts: 3,754
4/8/15 2:13 P

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Hi I am Donna. I have been on SP for several years on and off. I have been sober 20 years. For all these years I still have yet to conquer my food. I always had a blank spot in my life when I was a child in elementary school, I left with a friend of my father's to play with his foster children & next thing I am standing in font of my father telling me not to do that again. Several years back I was told I was victim of abuse, this past year through my own meditation skills I filled in the blanks. Now the correlation of all the deeds I did in my past come to light. Now at almost 66 years of age and a Cancer Survivor X2 I am determined to get this right.
Thank you for allowing me to join and for being supportive as we all have walked this path.

I wish we could put up some of the Christmas spirit in jars and open a jar of it every month. ~Harlan Miller

Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better. ~Emilie Coue

The best
thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time.
- Abraham Lincoln

Live your life from your heart. Share from your heart. And your story will touch and heal people's souls.
-- Melody Beattie


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3/28/15 5:47 P

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It's good to meet you 10 Toes. I wish you all the best. As Wispy said, we're here to help and support each other. I found AA to be a life-saver for me. It's scary and often discouraging to deal with the wreckage of our pasts. Just know you're not alone.
emoticon

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3/27/15 7:07 P

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Hi there 10 Toes. I have a friend who goes to the group you mention.

I go to AA. When I got sober there were not all the treatment centres etc. that there are today. I'm a young chick of 75 years. :)

As long as you find help and support wherever you go I think that is wonderful. I am no longer able to drive so I go to online skype meetings these days and find them wonderful.

My sponson in AA said "well lets get the booze out of your system first and then see what's left."

In my case I also have emotional/mental issues, depression and others. Had these issues long before I drank which I started at 15. Before that it was food for me also, and still can be at times.

Another thing my sponsor suggested was "not picking up one drink one day at a time". He said that was the important thing. Not to worry about dealing with the food until I was able to deal with the alochol, which was my worst addiction, in terms of hurting myself and others.

In the AA Book it also suggests using sweets as an aid to help with cravings in the early days of sobriety.

So pleased you have joined us. emoticon We are here to help and support one another.

Edited by: -WISPY- at: 3/27/2015 (19:26)
"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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10_TOES's Photo 10_TOES Posts: 130
3/27/15 6:08 P

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Hi,

I self medicate. I have since I was 10 or less. Food to start with, then at about 18 discovered alcohol, then drugs.

I have been sober for about a week now, seven days too late. I'm in legal trouble (again), but this time it's a lot more serious. Thankfully, no one was physically hurt as a result of my actions. We'll see about other kinds of hurt as time goes on.

I'm finally admitting I NEED help, can't do this on my own. I need God's help badly. Also admitting I NEED to address the underlying causes of my self medication.

I'm considering going to a Celebrate Recovery meeting in a little while. I went to AA previously, but it didn't help. At the time, I was forced to go by the court. I don't know if it didn't help because I wasn't ready or if it just wasn't for me.

Please pray for me.

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AJDOVER1's Photo AJDOVER1 SparkPoints: (295,098)
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2/12/15 4:39 P

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Welcome, Patricia! It's great to meet you. Best wishes on reaching your goals!
emoticon

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-WISPY-'s Photo -WISPY- Posts: 27,206
2/10/15 5:16 P

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Hello there Patricia. A warm welcome to the team, so happy you have joined us.

Hugs Wispy


"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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PCROSSON1's Photo PCROSSON1 Posts: 116
2/10/15 11:56 A

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hi, my name is Patricia, recovering addict, clean 7 years, so blessed, I am glad there is the this recovery group with sparks, looking forward to making friends and supporting each other, please feel free to get to know me. I am 55 years old and currently weigh 200 lbs, looking forward to losing 50 lbs, correctly, I quit smoking cigarettes on xmas day 20l4, with the help of Chantix, I feel great motivated, spring is around the corner, want to be fit and healthier, God Bless

I joined this group a couple of years ago, but I am serious today about losing this weight, looking for fellow support thanks

Edited by: PCROSSON1 at: 2/10/2015 (11:58)
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-WISPY-'s Photo -WISPY- Posts: 27,206
11/2/14 2:38 P

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100 lb weight loss is amazing, well done and congrats on 3 years sobreity.

Hugs Wispy

"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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AJDOVER1's Photo AJDOVER1 SparkPoints: (295,098)
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11/2/14 2:11 A

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it's great to see you here!

Let's walk!


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MAESTRAPLANK12's Photo MAESTRAPLANK12 SparkPoints: (49,172)
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11/1/14 2:24 A

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It is so great to return to this wonderful team. To introduce myself, I would refer anyone interested in knowing more about to read my recent blog, JOY BUBBLING IN MY SOUL.
I am so very grateful to celebrate three years of sobriety and a 100 pound weight loss.

Blessings to everyone! emoticon

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9/26/14 8:03 P

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It's great to meet you, Susan!
emoticon

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9/25/14 7:01 P

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Hi there Susan, I am loving your story and your wonderful photo. You are amazing.
Laughter is one of the great tools of recovery.

I am AA, CODA, OA, EA, and Alanon, Gamanon... as you can see we are quite an addictive family.

Each of these programmes in there own way have changed my life and fill me with happiness and understanding I never would have believed.

Spark people is a great place to be. Look forward to chatting more on the threads.
There are some wonderful people here. Each of us working on living as well as we can in recovery, or on the way there.

Hugs Wispy.

"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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LILSUZY1057's Photo LILSUZY1057 SparkPoints: (11,523)
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9/25/14 3:40 P

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Hi everyone! My name is Susan and I am an addict. For those of you who are hard core AA members, I am also an alcoholic. My story is that I started using amphetamines at the age of 14 to self medicate for depression. When I got married I quit cold turkey and was clean, but not recovered for 18 years until I got divorced. Once I was divorced I slowly got back into drugs and was on meth for several years. After being arrested, I quit cold turkey again and was, once again clean for 14 years but not recovered.

In 1999 I had to have back surgery. Things went along fairly well until a few years ago when it started hurting again. A trip to the doctor led to a prescription for pain pills and muscle relaxers. I took these as prescribed for quite a while. Then I started having trouble sleeping so the doctor also prescribed me a narcotic sleeping pill. I slowly built up a tolerance to the pain medicine. I never took the meds to get high, I took them to knock myself out. When the meds weren't enough I added alcohol to the mix. Luckily my daughter talked me into going into rehab before I accidentally overdosed. I was using up a month's supply of pain meds, and muscle relaxers in a 5 day period with the sleeping pills and alcohol on top of that. The only reason I got out of bed was to go to the liquor store, use the bathroom and to eat.

Of course, all my eating was fast food (mostly whatever could be delivered), microwave food and junk food. Add to that the fact that I was in bed all but about 5 hours out of the day and you can imagine how I packed on the pounds!

In rehab were were fed a lot of food high in carbs or sugar so more weight was put on. Then, when I got out of rehab I started using food as my drug. Now I am at 265 pounds (down from 281) and realizing that I still need to address issues that have nothing at all to do with food. The 12 Steps have been a miracle to me in my recovery and food is another thing I have to ask my Higher Power to help me on.

I know I can do this and support from all my AA and NA friends is truly appreciated. This time I am not only clean, I am in blessed recovery!

emoticon

Nothing changes if nothing changes.
AJDOVER1's Photo AJDOVER1 SparkPoints: (295,098)
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7/6/14 12:47 A

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Welcome Cynthia! It's good to get to know you.

I found a great deal of help in both AA and Al-Anon. I'm blessed that my Guy is also sober now, but I have family members who are still active in various addictions. I wish you all the best in finding peace and strength. You're not alone!

Let's walk!


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7/5/14 9:27 P

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Oh Cynthia, thank you so much for sharing your story so honestly. I too started drinking to try and deal with my emotional, mental and childhood problems. I thought when I found sobriety all the other stuff would just disappear.

But I discovered I was left with the person I was before I started drinking and with nothing to take the edge off. I also had a partner who was an alcoholic, although sober and a son who is still active. Al Anon helped me enormously and also gamanon because one of my boys has gambling issues. It was so hard to let go and allow him to be who he is. I know we all have to find our own rock bottom, but it is so hard to watch someone you love who has not got there yet.

I am so grateful to be sober and have found the people I needed along the way to help me with the other addictions and also the mental problems I had prior to drinking. One thing I know above all other is that ONE drink will not make it better and 1000 will not be enough.

Looking forward to getting to know you. xx

Edited by: -WISPY- at: 7/5/2014 (21:31)
"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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HLTHAPPINESS4C's Photo HLTHAPPINESS4C Posts: 22,500
7/5/14 2:37 P

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Hi Everyone! emoticon

I am glad to have found this team as I really need the support and hope to support others in the future.

I have a long history of substance abuse (teenage years to self medicate the bipolar and dysfunctional home life) (Early 20's to cope with divorce), and now here I am on the other side of the coin trying to cope with my boyfriend of a year and a half who is dealing with abusing prescription drugs. He is so far in denial that it is difficult for me to keep my mouth shut at times.

Last year I found out he was abusing the pills and it tore us apart as I simply couldn't handle it. I was angry, resentful, hurt and the trust factor went down the drain. He has a very dysfunctional relationship with his parents and brothers. He blames his upbringing for his use and what have you. I understand the need to self medicate...heck I did it for years. I have tried to tell him that he needs to get to the heart of what is it in life that he is trying to escape by using. He has a lot of anger (which he denies...but it is ever so evident in his passive aggressive behavior towards me at times and his parents). He had been doing well and then earlier last week he admitted he was using again. I had suspected such as his behavior had changed; he was more distant than usual and he was sleeping most of the time. He does have a mental illness which just complicates things all the more. I too have mental illness. I have bipolar that is quite severe and really difficult to stay stable.

I had been clean since Feb 2007, only to start drinking on occasion with my boyfriend. I was in denial...thinking that it wouldn't hurt anything and that we could just give it up. I have given it up, but he continues to bring beer into his apartment on occasion. It is very difficult for me to say no.

I used to go to AA & NA back in early 2000's and they helped me to get sober. Then I found that sometimes the topics would trigger my desire to use, so I quit going. I explained the situation with my psychiatrist and he said it was okay to stop going if I was no longer finding them helpful. I know the program works though.

Back in 2011, I was going through a terrible divorce and me and my ex were terribly co-dependent. I begun going to Celebrate Recovery ( a Christian 12 step program), and took a wonderful step study. I was able to do a lot of healing during this time. I haven't gone in ages, but have been considering going back, because I can not deal with bf's use alone. I know I can't change him and that I am NOT responsible for his use.

The only good thing is that my boyfriend is wanting to go to CR. The only thing is is that he says he simply can not accept his powerlessness. I'm like oh dear that's the whole foundation. I struggled with it myself, so I am trying to be patient. He hasn't gone yet and neither have I. I have severe fibromyalgia and it's hard for me to make the evening meetings. It may just be that I will have to find an alanon or naranon. (hopefully one that meets during the day).

I just feel like I am alone in this as a lot of people I know and am close to simply suggest I walk away and move on. I love him and do not wish to do that. He asked me to pray for him and try to encourage him. I am working on that, as it is all too easy for me to lash out.

I appreciate your reading this "mini novel". I am open to any advice or support that is given. Sometimes I just feel hopeless; and yet I know God (He is my HP) has a plan and future for me.

I look forward to getting to know you!

Cynthia~~~ A follower of Jesus Christ!!

Proverbs 3;5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; acknowledge him, and He will make your paths straight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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6/29/14 2:30 A

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Best wishes, Rachael! My Guy and I also found that we are not responsible for each other's behavior. We are truely partners, but we each "work our own program." It's possible to find peace.

Let's walk!


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BANDITSMAMA's Photo BANDITSMAMA Posts: 13
6/29/14 12:03 A

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Thank you Lesliesenior for your honesty and candidness! It is encouraging to read how you and your husband made it and I think it would be very helpful in our situation if I focused on my own stuff rather than his for awhile. When he does stop drinking, it is usually only a few weeks before my trying to "hold him accountable" and/or "be a support" to him results in a lot of fighting and I know my constant reading of his moods and attitudes toward recovery drive him nuts as well. And if I'm honest, they drive me nuts too!

Thanks to everyone for the warm welcome and I look forward to getting to know you all as well.


-Rachael


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CORKYTHEMOM1's Photo CORKYTHEMOM1 SparkPoints: (132,010)
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6/28/14 9:57 P

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emoticon to the team, Rachael! You are among friends who care. I'm an active member of AA, NA and Al-Anon. Please know that we are here for you. Embracing you in support and hugs.

Love, Light & Laughter,

*~* Monika *~*


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6/27/14 7:36 P

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Welcome Rachael!
I've found a great deal of helpful information in Al-Anon meetings and I continue to use the literature. I'm looking forward to getting to know you. I wish you the best

Let's walk!


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6/27/14 12:29 P

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Hi there Rachael and a warm welcome to the team. emoticon



Edited by: -WISPY- at: 6/27/2014 (12:34)
"Give thanks for everything until you are absolutely sure it is not a blessing in disguise." Eastern Proverb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Be the change you wish to see in the world.." Mahatma Gandhi.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Quitters never win and winners never quit." Anon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Make the decision to enjoy today. Do what you need to do for tomorrow - but live fully in TODAY.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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LESLIESENIOR's Photo LESLIESENIOR SparkPoints: (133,718)
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6/27/14 10:44 A

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Welcome Rachael. I hope you begin to find the answers and help you are looking for. I know that we all understand deeply your struggles. I am a recovering alcoholic, but have also worked on my propensity to be co-dependent to others with addictions in my family. It takes much honesty, self evaluation, and courage, but it is possible to find peace and balance again. I found Melody Beattie books extremely helpful.
I will tell you this, the addict cannot prevent you from seeking the help you need for yourself if you really want it. Nothing in the Al-Anon program blames you or your reactions for keeping him drinking. In fact, quite the opposite, you are NOT responsible for his drinking. You already know this. Please keep exploring literature, counseling, and meetings.

When I got sober, my husband and I spent several years getting our own help without interfering with the recovery and counseling of the other. It saved our marriage. We celebrated 42 years last January. You don't have to leave your husband, but you must get the help you need without being held hostage by what makes him "comfortable".

I hope I haven't been too candid, but honesty, openness, and clarity saved my life. So I feel the need to share.
Leslie

I try to hold fast to the truth that a full and thankful heart cannot entertain great conceits. When brimming with gratitude, one's heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love, the finest emotion that we can ever know. AS BILL SEES IT



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BANDITSMAMA's Photo BANDITSMAMA Posts: 13
6/26/14 10:40 P

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Hi. My name is Rachael. I struggle with my own food addiction and also struggle coping with my husband's alcoholism. I suppose I fit the profile of a codependent although there is much to that label which I find offensive. However, while I refuse to accept all the stuff about how my reactions make his alcoholism continue (I don't believe I'm responsible nor do I believe it is possible to love a husband and NOT feel upset when he has almost died from drinking yet continues to drink), I do have to admit that my automatic dives into despair over his drinking are not exactly the healthiest response...and so I am open to learning how to find peace with it. I have attended Al-Anon in the past but have stopped as he is not comfortable with my attending a co-ed group and there are no women's only groups in my area. I am not open to divorce and so am especially interested on insights from anyone who has found peace in this situation WITHOUT leaving their husband.

Thanks!

-Rachael


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4/28/14 11:20 A

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emoticon Dyanne!

I'm looking forward to getting to know you!

Let's walk!


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4/27/14 11:41 P

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Welcome Dyanne,
It will be good to get to know you. This is a good team with wise and helpful advice. We are glad you are here.
Leslie

I try to hold fast to the truth that a full and thankful heart cannot entertain great conceits. When brimming with gratitude, one's heartbeat must surely result in outgoing love, the finest emotion that we can ever know. AS BILL SEES IT



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4/27/14 2:14 P

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Hello. My name is Dyanne and I am an addict - in recovery from addiction. For 21 years. I have battled with weight all my life. July 2012 I had gastric sleeve surgery to rid myself of Chronic Type 2 diabetes. It worked. I went from 210lbs to 140 lbs. I am no longer taking any diabetic meds. I can go 45 mins on my elliptical trainer! Amazing!! However, I've hit a stall and want to lose 20lb more to reach my goal.



Nothing changes if nothing changes.


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2/11/14 10:46 P

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You're in the right place! It's nice to meet you. emoticon

Let's walk!


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2/11/14 10:46 A

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Good day!
My name is Michelle...and I am a very grateful member of Al-Anon. Mom, sister and extended family qualifiy me and my searching, sometimes serenity-filled, heart keep me coming back. 19 years and counting of being part of the 12 steps and the insight, fellowship and comfort that come with it. I am especially thrilled there is a place here in Sparkpeople. Thank you to whomever began this team.

I wish you all a beautiful day! Talk to you again soon.
Michelle

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7/16/13 12:26 P

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So good to see you here, Lucy! emoticon

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LUCYPAPERHANGER's Photo LUCYPAPERHANGER SparkPoints: (10,881)
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7/15/13 5:10 P

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(Please forgive me, but in the interest of time, I am copying most of this from another AA-type SP Team I am on; I did add some stuff this time that I forgot):

Hi, I'm Lucy, and I am an alcoholic. When I was young, I went through seasons where I clearly drank too much, but for the most part I could take it or leave it. Then Ricky and I started our family: two sweet babies born 18 mos., apart, both colicy, and I had no support. He'd go off to work and I had no help. When they finally fell asleep, I'd have a little wine to relax. Oh, did I mention we had both just left a *cult*?! Long story. I was still reeling from that (insane) experience, but not quite abusing alcohol yet. Then my dad passed away in 2003, and I started to drink more. My husband went along at first. The kids would finally be asleep, and we'd drink and goof around and have fun; this was our release. It was like the early scenes in "Days of Wine and Roses" with Jack Lemmon, before everything falls apart. Eventually, though, while Ricky would intuitively know when to stop, I'd sneak a shot or two when he went to the bathroom or whatever. My sneaking drinks started to become habitual. I became the housewife with the coffee cup of booze! Then we adopted two more precious sons, who both have special needs (reactive attachment disorder-- typical of adopted children). After a hectic day, I felt I "deserved" to drink. After all, the children were in bed.

I never had a DUI (thanks be to GOD), I never went to jail, I never wrapped my car around a tree or hurt anyone, never abused our precious children (thank You, LORD), and *most* of my heavy drinking occurred right at home when they were fast asleep. But I started to have some health issues, and I started to think maybe I wasn't drinking "like normal people," you know? I remember a man from our insurance company came to do some tests, blood work and so forth. Ricky reminded me, "Remember, you can't have alcohol for 48 hours." I nearly died. As soon as that man left, I went into the kitchen and mixed a martini. Then the doorbell rang-- he had forgotten his special pen. I was holding the drink behind my back, utterly mortified.

After mentioning "drinking more than I intended to" and/or "getting drunk-- but I didn't mean to!" in the Confessional several times, finally our Priest gently suggested to me that I check out AA. I dutifully trotted off to a meeting, but the stories I heard were so over-the-top, I thought, *surely* I am not an alcoholic-- I've never done anything remotely like these dear souls have!!! So I took one of those AA quizzes, and according to my score, I *did* have a drinking problem. I kept going to meetings but I just couldn't believe I could be a REAL alcoholic, when the worst thing I'd done is make a fool of myself in several social situations. The real kicker is that I got tipsy at the Golden Jubilee of the very Priest who first sent me to AA! How utterly embarrassing. emoticon Yes, I am an alcoholic.

For the next several years I was in and out of AA. The longest time I went without taking a drink was almost a year. I almost got that coveted AA birthday cake, but I didn't make it. I was so *steeped* in denial, so after all that time, I believed I could handle controlling my drinking ("the great obsession of every alcoholic")...

...but each time I left AA to "control" my drinking... the drink ended up controlling ME. I hate feeling like a slave to alcohol. When I stay close to meetings, though, I feel so free. I like that feeling. My Sponsor tells me I have a very short memory, so the fellowship helps me to remember that I *AM* AN ALCOHOLIC-- even though I have extremely "high bottoms"! Give me enough time away from the program, though, and I'd probably have the same horror stories the others do. The fellowship also makes my obsession to drink go away, which is wonderful.

So, here I am, a little bit like "The Housewife Who Drank at Home" in the Big Book. Though I didn't drink nearly as much as she did, I can relate to her story in many ways.

Today I do not have to take that first drink.

Thank you for letting me share. emoticon

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3/14/13 7:35 P

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Welcome! Please join is at the Drop in Centre so we can get to know each other better.

Let's walk!


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40LESSOFERIN's Photo 40LESSOFERIN SparkPoints: (8,363)
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3/14/13 5:22 P

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Hi, my name is Erin and i'm an Adult -child of an alcoholic father, drug addict mother and married to an Alcoholic who is about to go into a 30day rehab house. I'm in Al-anon. I've been active on spark for about 6 months and just recently seek help to deal with my hubby. Thank you for welcoming me to the group

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2/23/13 5:43 P

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Welcome, Cheryl! Hope you can join us in the Drop In Centre for a chat.

Let's walk!


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NELSONCHERYL59's Photo NELSONCHERYL59 SparkPoints: (29,981)
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2/22/13 8:33 P

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Hi, my name is cheryl and i am a grateful recovering alcoholic and addict, codependent, now my strugge is with food.

Cheryl from pennsylvania


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2/3/13 6:36 P

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it's good to get to know you, Linda! We all need help and support. This is a great place to find both.

Let's walk!


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LINDA2656's Photo LINDA2656 SparkPoints: (697)
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2/3/13 4:03 P

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Hi, I'm in recovery, struggled with that for a long time until I hit my bottom, going on 3 years. Started Spark People last year before a vacation. Lost 18 lbs in 3 mos. Then of course vacation was over so, so was my desire to loss more. Now that I've been smoke & alcohol free it's caught up with me as so many things do and in order to feel better physically, I need to loss what I've gained, plus. So I'm back! Willing to go to any lengths, but with anything else, need help & support. Good to be here.

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MAESTRAPLANK12's Photo MAESTRAPLANK12 SparkPoints: (49,172)
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1/20/13 10:36 P

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I am not really new to the group. I tried to eliminate a dated boring SparkPage from years ago and bingo....both SparkPages were deleted. So......I am now maestraplank12. This is a great support group!

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12/23/12 4:17 P

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Good to meet you, Pat! Hope you can join us at the Drop in Centre so we can get to know you better.

Let's walk!


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NEEDTOLOOSE1's Photo NEEDTOLOOSE1 Posts: 1,672
12/23/12 2:03 P

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Hi my name is Pat and I am an alcoholic among other addictions. I have been sober and drug free for 11 years - my sobriety date is Nov 29th I have been smoke free for 2 years on Nov. 5th. I am working now on overeating.
Looking to walk with Journey with like minded people
Pat

Pat - from Iowa
"One Day At a Time"
Central time zone
VTRICIA's Photo VTRICIA Posts: 2,178
11/26/12 11:28 A

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Hi, Joy! I saw you in the drop in center already, but it's good to see you here.

5'7.5"

Losers Keepers: Transition to Maintenance
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11/25/12 4:42 P

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It's good to meet you, Joy! Please join us at the Drop In Centre so we can get to know you!

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IAM_HIS2's Photo IAM_HIS2 Posts: 59,999
11/25/12 7:55 A

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Hi, my name is Joy. All my family members were alcoholic except my Mum. Alcohol feed the roots of my family tree. Consequently, the is ems of the disease have crept into my behavior without my knowing it. Because of counseling and a wise counselor, I was encouraged to join Al-anon.

I need to change my eating habits. Because I am using food to be nourish my body as well as comfort my emotions. So here I am stretching my hand out for help.

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10/11/12 10:24 P

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Hi Lynda! You're found the right place for introductions. It's good to meet you. Please join us over at the Drop in Centre for a chat.

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GEOJEEPR1948's Photo GEOJEEPR1948 SparkPoints: (87)
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10/11/12 2:34 A

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hi, i've been trying to figure how to introduce myself to the group, and i hope this is the right place. I'm Lynda and I'm an alcoholic/addict. I will have 24 years clean and sober next month. I quit smoking about 6 years ago...now i need to lose all the weight I gained from not smoking. Whew! I gained weight after i got sober and started eating. I blossomed up to 230 ish, and leveled off at around 185. Then i quit smoking and hae gone back up to 215. Recently changed my eating habits due to health problems caused by smoking. I have lost about 6 pounds, then put 3 back on. I know that i can't do it alone..so here i am!

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10/10/12 11:45 P

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That's definitely a emoticon

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JKISSES83's Photo JKISSES83 SparkPoints: (2,955)
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10/10/12 11:14 P

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silly me i went back to count the days and as of today 30 days sober emoticon

Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.
- Mark Twain

"My life tomorrow will be the result of my attitudes and the choices I make today."


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10/10/12 4:18 P

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Glad to meet you here, Jessica! Please join us at the Drop in Centre so we can get to know you better

Let's walk!


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10/9/12 11:30 P

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hi my name is jessica and im new to the group ive been on SP for about a year now but just recently quit drinking and im 3 weeks sober...i can say ive definitely been enjoying my non-hungover days!!! looking forward to the future conversations :)

Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.
- Mark Twain

"My life tomorrow will be the result of my attitudes and the choices I make today."


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AWESOMECAROL55's Photo AWESOMECAROL55 SparkPoints: (107,011)
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7/20/12 6:31 P

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Karen...I'm so glad you joined us...this is a great team that offers a lot of support! Aurlie is right ...none of us is perfect! We all kinda like hanging out here I think...It's a great place to show our wonderful imperfect selves!! Welcome!!

Carol

Carol

FIERCE + FOCUSED= FIT!

" I DO NOT STOP FOR OBSTACLES....I DESTROY THEM!"

"Attitude is everything"


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7/19/12 6:08 P

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Hi Karen! I'm looking forward to getting to know you! None of us here are perfect (oops, maybe I should just speak for myself), but progress is the name of the game!

Let's walk!


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LIONESS678's Photo LIONESS678 Posts: 86
7/19/12 12:14 P

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Welcome Karen! I'm pretty new too, and everybody around here has been very friendly and supportive. Don't hesitate to "scoot" on over to the Drop In Center and visit! - Marci

SCOOTER4263's Photo SCOOTER4263 Posts: 2,310
7/19/12 9:40 A

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I should say right up front that I still have most of my vices, at least to some degree, but over the years I've known - and lost - many friends to addictions of various sorts. I had a nightclub in the 1970s and early 80s, and if the punk crowd doesn't teach you about bad behavior, you're not paying attention.

In our early years together (those same 70s and 80s) my husband and I had, between us, probably more substance abuse problems than some small communities, but when we got married and had babies, we both just sort of aged out of it. Those babies grew up clean and sober, although other extended family members didn't fare as well.

I joined this group largely because of AWESOMECAROL55, who is, indeed, awesome - I read a couple of her morning meditations and wanted to read more. My addictions these days run more to firmly entrenched bad habits... but the more I think about it (and that's one of my addictions - I *think* things to death regularly instead of taking action) the more that seems not so very different.

So here I am, and if, through watching and learning, I can shed a few of my remaining vices, that'd probably be a good thing, too.

Karen

Pray to God, but row for shore.
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5/31/12 9:57 P

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Welcome! It's good to meet you. Please come over to the Drop in Centre... so we can get to know you better.

Let's walk!


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