Hi Braveone, glad to have you on the team. I was caregiver to my dh for 17 years. He passed away in June of this year. It feels really weird not having him at home. He was not a joiner of activities. He like his own company or visitors. Due to a major stroke he walked with a walker so a lot of activities he could do where very limited. He did not seem to mind. Good for you for taking such good care of your mom. Even if she is in a nursing home, I am sure you still have to give a lot of your time for her care.
But make sure you care for yourself also.
HOPE is not pretending that there's never any sorrow - It's the knowledge that our troubles will be overcome tomorrow. It's the inner strength we call on to sustain us now and then, till our problems lie behind us and we are happy again
Pounds lost: 0.0
Fitness Minutes: (169,385) Posts: 14,970 10/22/12 3:33 P
Nice to have you with the Team! So glad to her that MOM is trying to make some adjustments with going to the NH. Went through a similar situation with my MOM a decade ago, but she left the family with pneumonia. At that time Dad was her Caregiver. Even even though my sister an I both helped out it was just not enough. Give your MOM some time, she just may change her mind about activities in the home. Many times it can depend on how the caregivers there will approach her. Let them know you would like to have them help you with that. If you should need she help or company, join us in the Chat Room. Let us know what you may need an we will do are best to help.
Michele - Northern Kentucky
Warriors In Pink~~Administrator Classy Quitters~~ Administrator Caregivers Support ~~ Administrator
" Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could." ~Ralpd Waldo Emerson
September Minutes: 3,000
Fitness Minutes: (140,550) Posts: 22,351 10/22/12 2:21 P
I have been a caregiver for my dear Mom, a total of 5 years on Oct. 31. My step-dad passed on that day. Since then, I have conducted all of Mom's business and taking care of her.
Mom will be 93 on Nov. 16. She has been falling lots for a few years. She has had mini strokes and a somewhat crippled foot~caused by a fall. In the last week of July, she took a hard fall and stayed in the hospital for 4 days. From there she was admitted to the nursing home. She has remained there, because she no longer can stand nor walk on her own.
I have removed all of her belongings from her apartment. Most of it went to my sister and her daughter.
At the present, Mom has seemingly accepted that this is where she needs to be. Her every need has thankfully been supplied by the employees. They are very good to her. She desires foremost to go to be with the Lord, but thus far, He has not taken her.
It took a long time for me to trust that the nursing home would take care of Mom. I suffered with guilt, feeling like I had handed her over to strangers who may not care for her. I felt so uneasy for days. But visiting Mom almost every day, I finally began to understand that she was in good hands. Now, I am resting more easily. I can now miss an occasional day. But I talk to her by phone a couple of times daily when I do not go.
Mom's mind is good and she isn't depressed. She still loves to talk. The main difference that I can see in her, is that she no longer wants to be sociable. Example: She doesn't want to go to the dining room to eat, nor attend church services, nor go to physical therapy, where there are other patients. Tho I have tried to get her too, she won't change her mind. She still loves to have visitors to come and see her.
"I lift up my eyes to the hills-where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and Earth." Psalm 121: 1-2 (NIV)
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