Author: Sorting Last Post on Top ↓ Message:
SMILINEYESBLUE's Photo SMILINEYESBLUE Posts: 882
5/14/10 10:36 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Reach out for help in your community and ask the hospital where you should turn next. It is time for counseling for all of you and if you have a church family, ask them for help.

You can do this and soon it will become routine. I know you are exhausted and scared and think the world has ended but you can hang on tight and fight for your kids and hubby.

You need to take naps and maybe get some meds to relax you and take the stress out of your life. Ask your doctor what to do next. Do not give up as your children depend on Mom.

Ask the schools to get mentors or tutors for your children to get their grades up and maybe go to summer school. Kids bounce back nicely.

 current weight: 177.0 
 
185
181.25
177.5
173.75
170
SCHATZY25's Photo SCHATZY25 Posts: 1,057
5/13/10 1:32 P

My SparkPage
Reply
Thanks for the warm welcome.

I relied too much on my kids, especially my 14 year old when DH had his stroke. Their grades dropped so much, I still don't know if they can recover from that. It was a shock to all of us. Still haven't woken up from this nightmare.

It's been really hard, our lives have changed so much we haven't been able to adjust quite yet. Hopefully we will soon.

I had to learn so many things that I took for granted because DH always took care of them. I am scared on most days because I don't know if I have the strength to make it and pull everyone with me.

Sometimes you just have to smile, pretend everything is okay, hold back the tears and just walk away.

The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not.
Thomas Jefferson

RHALES199's Photo RHALES199 SparkPoints: (27,179)
Fitness Minutes: (9,106)
Posts: 7,246
5/13/10 12:21 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Teams I am on:

Boise Sparks
Idaho Living
Caregivers support (leader)
Celiac & Gluten Free
Frucose Intolerance
Leaving 210- ville
LDS Ladies
Love Kids, Just Don't Have Any
One Person, One Dream (pay it Forward)
People w/ Cerebral Palsy
People w/ DIsabilities on Fixed Income
Plantar Fasciitis
Sleep Apnea
South Beach Diet
Tall Ladies
SMILINEYESBLUE's Photo SMILINEYESBLUE Posts: 882
5/12/10 1:57 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Good Morning!
Wow, you took me back 8 years to when my husband had a major stroke and could not walk, talk or see. It was so scarey and I am "it". We have no family here and I could not find a sole to hire and the doctor did not send in Home Health. Fight for some help!!
Call RSVP, retired Seniors that volunteer help, or a church or whatever you have in your town. I did not have any kids at home and I don't think I slept the first year.

Bud had to be taken 45 minutes each way to Physical Therapy, rest an hour, then go to Occupational Therapy and then rest and hour and go to Speech Therapy. We had a ranch and so I had to get up extra early to feed the horses, cows, pigs and rabbits, then feed Bud and away we'd go. We got home about 4 or 5 at night and I had to take care of the animals again. Bud and I ate out or I'd grab something to bring home as I did not have any extra energy to do one more thing.

I lost myself for a whole year and I did not think I would survive. Neither my doctor or his doctor would get me any help. I finally sold the ranch and moved us up here where the doctors and hospital are about ten minutes away. I should have put him in a nursing home for a few months and taken care of myself. I'd do that if it happens again.

I am glad you have a 14 year old and I pray the kids will each help you and do what they can. ADHD is not easy to live with but our grandson has it and as long as his world is structured, he does well.

My heart cries for you as I have walked in your shoes and being alone and helpless is the worst thing I can think of. Fight for some help or put him in a nursing home so that you can be a Mom and a Wife. I am so sorry you can't get help. You are welcome to vent here and know that all of us will cheer you on. Many of us have gone through this and there is advice on here from others who survived also. You can do this!! Please come to our 2010 Community Chat and share your needs and know that many of us will be praying for all of you.

I am having back surgery next Monday and will be gone for at last two weeks on here but I want you to know I care and will be back. Hugs and prayers, Marianne

 current weight: 177.0 
 
185
181.25
177.5
173.75
170
SCHATZY25's Photo SCHATZY25 Posts: 1,057
5/12/10 9:07 A

My SparkPage
Reply
Hi, I am the sole caregiver to my husband who suffered a severe stroke in January this year. He is only 40 years old. I am also now the sole caretaker of our three children, ages 14, 11 (has ADHD) and 8.
It hasn't been easy from the night DH had his stroke and I had to call 911 (they hung up on me after saying that if there is a change in his condition to call back - I am looking into legal actions).
My family is all in Germany and they are too far away to help me out with either the kids or DH. My Mom managed to come for three weeks around Easter which was great but not so much for her (had to take unpaid vacation time that set her back three months for retirement next year). I have no help (and I have to admit I don't want any from them anymore) from my in-laws, DH's family. They don't like me and let DH know about it from the start. Anyways. Sorry for venting already.

I am taking DH to his therapy every other day for three hours and to doctor appointments once a week. I do the yard work (have no green thumb), take care of the house, the kids and projects for school, arguing with teachers. Do the finances and hope I do that right, I fight with the Insurance company and others which I am not used to do. DH always did all that.

I am lost in bureaucracy. Finally got the paper work done for SS Disability.

I am at a loss and just wish DH would have a full recovery and we can back to our "normal" life.

Sometimes you just have to smile, pretend everything is okay, hold back the tears and just walk away.

The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not.
Thomas Jefferson

Page: 1 of (1)  

Report Innappropriate Post

Other Caregivers Support Introduce Yourself to Team Forum Posts

Topics: Last Post:
thank you for being there 7/22/2013 8:59:37 PM
Hello to all 1/16/2014 8:59:13 PM
dementia caregiver 7/22/2013 11:13:31 PM
Hi 7/29/2013 5:19:55 PM
Hello, I am new to doing caregiving as work relate 3/11/2014 11:02:20 PM

Thread URL: http://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_messageboard_thread.asp?board=-1x4565x34085019

Review our Community Guidelines