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TAILLESS's Photo TAILLESS SparkPoints: (5,012)
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2/21/08 2:41 A

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I'm sorry that you're having to go through all this Chris, I've been there before and I feel for you. I also feel for your Mum who is probably aware of what is going on with your Dad but unable to help. Just know that we are here for you to vent whenever you want to about what ever you want to, we're here for you. emoticon

Deb
Victoria, Australia
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CFAIRC's Photo CFAIRC Posts: 48
2/20/08 9:23 A

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hello everyone,
I haven't been on much this past week. We've had the flu bug here and a trip to the er. My husband missed a couple days of work, which is unusual for him. My mom has called numerous times to keep me informed of how they are doing. I was called over to the nursing home Monday night, my dad was crying all day. I told the nurse that he was uncomfortable and not feeling good. I had them put dad to bed before i left. It's frustrating right now, they have changed staff again. I'm going to make it a point to get over there everyday to monitor his care. The one new aide sits dad up straight, then leaves him sitting all day without repositioning him, so he leans over the side of his geri chair now when his back starts hurting. When i got back from taking my mom to her doctor, they were feeding dad.... again he was slumped in his chair, almost sliding out.. The aide complained when i asked her to help sit him up straight. Also, yesterday his doctor has changed his food intake to pureed. You could see in his eyes he did not feel well. He ate fairly well, but not like he usually does and fell asleep as i pushed him back to his area. I told one of his aides (Richard, he's really good with the residents)I laid his chair back and covered him up so he could rest until they had time to put dad to bed after they finished feeding the other residents. Richard let dads aide know and she started making some comments i couldn't quite make out. But i noticed as i was leaving my mothers room on the way out Richard was tending to my dad. I can see i will need to start making documentation's again about dads care and take it to the head nurse. I realize they are short on staff and new, but somethings you can not overlook (comfort of the resident versus aides convenience)
The same aid was asked by my mom to change dad, because he was wet through his clothes, she made the comment to her that she only had an hour left and that dad probably had just spilled something down the front of him. Mom told her no,she was with him the whole time, they were playing bingo and he wet himself. When mom checked on dad a little later, he was still sitting there in the wet clothes and the aide had left.
Sorry i just needed to vent a little. I have been trying to stay focused on my weight goals but it is hard right now. Chris

"Don't beat yourself up if you over-indulge. Just
pick yourself up and start all over again" ... Linda Ross


“Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.” (1 Corinthians 10:23, see also 6:12)



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RENA1965's Photo RENA1965 Posts: 17,878
2/14/08 11:19 P

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Hello my name is Rena and I am a professional caregiver. I usually work a 34 hour week and travel around for my council to the elder and handicapped whom don't have family to care for them during work hours. I do usually hours between 7-15, but in my field we can have changing work hours in the evenings and also at night.
I have been doing this for many years and would never change jobs. My goal is to making individuals every day life struggles less harder and keep their self respect intact by helping them with all the tricky practical things like taking a bath, making food and cleaning their home. It is also expected of us to take a cup of coffee and talk with folks whom don't get out that much.
I get sad when I lose people, but with age and wisdom accept sometimes the elderly have lived life, seen their children be adults and sometimes die before them.
I get more out of this job, than working in a factory. I feel I do something positive each and every day and have a huge network of professionals behind me when I run into sometimes extreme serious problems.

Edited by: RENA1965 at: 2/14/2008 (23:19)
"I shall shape my future. Whether I fail or succeed shall be no man's doing but my own. I am the force; I can clear any obstacle before me. Or I can be lost in the maze. My choice. My responsbility. Win or lose, only I hold the key to my destiny."
-google first. ask questions later
¸.·*´¨) ¸.·*¨) ¸.·*¨)
(***Rena ***)
(¸.·´~ (¸.·* ~ (¸.·*


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OLEIGH88's Photo OLEIGH88 Posts: 58
2/12/08 12:27 P

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Hello, my name is Leigh. I am very excited to have stumbled upon this site. I am very glad to be here. I am excited to share in the support!

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TAILLESS's Photo TAILLESS SparkPoints: (5,012)
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1/29/08 5:51 A

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Isn't it hard to have to do for your parents what they did for you 30 or 40 or 50 years before? I hated feeding Mum, well hate is a harsh word but you know what I mean. At the time though, I found myself wishing I wasn't working and could do it more often because if I hadn't been there she would've had to have waited for a carer to come and feed her. You feel like, how dignified is this for them? Its really not fair.

cya, Deb

Deb
Victoria, Australia
You go girlfriend


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CFAIRC's Photo CFAIRC Posts: 48
1/28/08 10:35 P

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Hi everyone,
Thanks for the encouragement. I live in Rockton, Illinois. My dad is in the late stage of alzhemiers also. The facility dad and mom are in take good care of them, but they have their moments too. The facility finally placed dad in a geri-chair Thursday, after my pushing for a month or so. I was so frustrated with them when i got there Thursday to take my mom to her doctor appointment. They had placed a backboard behind him to help him sit up straight and support his head, two days before. Dad was slumped over the side of his wheelchair. The aide told me he was like that ever since they placed the back board in his chair and they couldn't get him to sit up straight. I was told by the head nurse they were trying something different, but he just couldn't sit up straight. They were suppose to put some pillows in around him to help straighten him up... but there was nothing. Unless he was in bed, This was how he had been left to sit. You could see in his face how uncomfortable he was. The aide was trying to feed him (he needs one on one care so he doesn't aspirate) while he was slumped over like that. When I told the aide I would take over, dad looked at me with a tear in his eye. I told him I would take care of this and decided I was not leaving this time until something was done. They put him to bed to rest and had a geri chair brought in for him when they got him up for supper. Sorry, I guess I needed to vent. I know what you mean about insurance. We have a $7,000.00 deductible. Another reason I'm waiting for surgery. We're still trying to pay off the deductible from the second knee surgery. You could say I'm an emotional/stress eater too. On a really stressful bad day, I could eat anything and everything in site.



"Don't beat yourself up if you over-indulge. Just
pick yourself up and start all over again" ... Linda Ross


“Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.” (1 Corinthians 10:23, see also 6:12)



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JUDYK16's Photo JUDYK16 SparkPoints: (0)
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1/28/08 10:33 A

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emoticon ! I think, as caregivers, we forget that we need to take care of ourselves also and most people don't realize how difficult caregiving can be. I take care of my mom, who has late stage Alzheimer's. It's a 24 hour a day, 7 day a week job. She can't walk without assistance and even then, she can barely make it through the house. I've been recovering from surgery on my right hand and, because the recovery is taking longer than I expected, I'm putting off having the left hand done. Plus, since I have to carry my own insurance, to make it affordable, I have a $3000.00 deductible. Throw in the fact that I'm and emotional/stress eater, it's very difficult to eat right and get in shape. It's funny how, in my head, potato chips make a bad day better!!

Judy emoticon

Judy
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"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities have crept in. Forget them as soon as you can."
Ralph Waldo Emerson


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RHALES199's Photo RHALES199 SparkPoints: (27,179)
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1/28/08 9:24 A

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Welcome to the team!
Yes, you are in the right place!!
I miss not being able to go hiking too. It's something I hope to be able to do again someday.

Where are you from?


Teams I am on:

Boise Sparks
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KNUCKLES145's Photo KNUCKLES145 Posts: 13,221
1/28/08 9:18 A

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you have come to the right place and man do you have alot on your plate. But you are right. You do need to take care of yourself. because if you don't who is going to be there to take care of everybody else. emoticon

All the so called "secrets of success"will not work ... unless you do.




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CFAIRC's Photo CFAIRC Posts: 48
1/28/08 9:14 A

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I'm new to this site. I accidentally came across the spark team website and realized this was the site for me. I just had my 52 birthday a week ago. I have a
26 yr old daughter and 7 years ago married a wonderful, understanding husband. After losing my job of 16 years in a company layoff, I became a full time caregiver of my parents in 2001, when my father was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and my mother fell and broke both her arms... so I understand the meaning of stressed out.... I have my limitations (or as others might say disabilities) too. Which in itself is very frustrating for me. I miss being able to do a lot of the things i used to, like hike or just take a long walk around town. I guess you could say, I've let myself go. The hardest thing for me to do was place my dad in a long term care facility. A decision that still bothers me a lot. I can still hear dad tell me he didn't like it, but he understood. He was only going to stay for a few weeks of respite while I recovered from having knee replacement surgery (he has been there 4 years). I keep wishing the situation with my mother and brother would have been better at the time. (something i won't get into at this time, it still makes me angry when i think of it)
The facility has taken good care of dad. After having surgery, my mother asked to stay at the facility during her recovery to be with dad and has since decided to move into the facility. She is a very trying and demanding person and it can take all your energy just to deal with her. I've also began to care for my father-in-law who has what we and the doctor believe to be the beginning stages of Alzheimer's. Enough with all that, I have found myself overwhelmed at times and needing to start taking care of myself more. I've gained about 50+ pounds and have very little energy some days. I need another knee surgery, but after having two replacement surgeries on the same knee within a year, I find myself putting off having the other knee done. I keep telling myself this year is going to be better, but the year goes by with little or no weight loss, mostly weight gain. I am looking to get off the roller coaster of weight loss and gain. I have no other reason except to become healthy for myself. I can use all the support I can get to stay motivated.


"Don't beat yourself up if you over-indulge. Just
pick yourself up and start all over again" ... Linda Ross


“Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.” (1 Corinthians 10:23, see also 6:12)



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