I think, right now, my goal is to get myself to take care of me "in spite of." In spite of these shingles that attack again and again (and are just now healing!). In spite of this terrible depression. In spite of my financial problems. In spite of my anxiety that is so bad I went to bed this afternoon just because I wanted to escape it.
There are a lot of "in spite ofs." Each one weights me down like a stack of dictionaries, 10 high, on the top of my head. They are chained to me like Ebenezer Scrooge's partner, Marley. Each dictionary is in a different language, but they all say the same things, over and over and over, things that intend to keep me down. They all seem to forget I was a rock climber, though. I used to look at the "in spite ofs" and study them, looking for a finger hold, a toe hold, some way to get up and over.
So no matter how long it takes, I will get up and over, and beat these obstacles to the ground.
EST: Eastern Standard Time (Norfolk, Virginia)
Name change: lauriejg to lauriejohannah. I like my name better than name with initials, that's all.
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