Here I am, 40 and the heaviest I have ever been in my life....all
though i have been heavy all my life....I have never known what it is like to be fit and healthy. Now here I am 40 and half (or more) of my life is gone, I have to experience life fit and healthy and yes, sexy! I have to get in shape and turn heads and sit on my guy's lap without crushing his legs....I have to feel comfortable to walk around my room naked and not be uncomfortable Making love with the lights on! Sorry, if that is offensive to anyone but, come on, you've all felt it at one time or another! I am here to hopefully be able to speak frankly and not be afraid of my own shadow, especially my own reflection. I wanna run around with my kids and ride on the back of my guys bike and wear shorts on a hot day without feeling self-conscience....I wanna wear a swimsuit comfortably for the first time in my life....this is all obtainable, right......What am I afraid of? what stops me from reaching my goals? Why do I start and then when progress starts showing, i stop? Why am I allowing this invisible roadblock to stop me from finding myself? How do I defeat what I can't see? I am here to defeat what i can't see and I am here to find the me that is tired of hiding inside this "fatsuit" that is suffocating me! I am loved for who I am by my children and my guy, they will love me thin and fit just as they have loved me fat and sick! I wanna breathe and be free...it's well past time to really start living my life and stop hiding from things that don't even exist! Today is the start of my new beginning.....Watch out world the tiger is going to break free!
Life is good...
| current weight: 230.0