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PROVERBS31JULIA's Photo PROVERBS31JULIA Posts: 2,078
2/2/14 12:33 A

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Hi ya'll, I've not been on here much - just have entirely too many teams to deal with. So I'm voting myself off the island, since I've not been much of a player. I spend too much time online trying to check in with all the teams and feeling guilty when I don't. I need to spend that time EXERCISING and taking care of myself, so I can help others!! I haven't even been participating in teams I started - and that's a really sad state of affairs!!
emoticon
We'll likely see each other around on the Spark, and you can always stop by my page and say "Hi!". I'd like to think I could eventually re-join the team (that is, if you'll have me back!!).

So just wanted to let you know (in case anyone notices when the count drops by one!).

Cheers!
Julia




Matthew 6:33-34
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
5/31/13 1:56 A

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Welcome! I know what you mean about looking at other people's facebooks and lives... I tried vocational counseling but just the idea of going back to work put me in a downward spiral, plus they didn't really have anything in mind that I loved doing, and its hard enough for me to get up each day to volunteer where I pretty much call the shots, let alone some job that is just to bring in a little extra income (which would be taken away through spend-down).

I've been stable on my medication for a long time now, but have been adjusting it slightly downward after some discouraging side effects.

Anyway, welcome to the group!

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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CPRICE408's Photo CPRICE408 SparkPoints: (1,952)
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5/30/13 11:12 P

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Ashley, you're not alone in the watching other people's lives pass by. I'm 22, live in a group home for the mentally ill, and they are still playing around with my medication. Sometimes I get sick of seeing my friends' facebook pages because they are leading successful, happy lives, and where am I? In a group home.

More about me: I got diagnosed with Schizoaffective Bipolar Type in March of this year, but the symptoms had been there for a year. Things have just gotten progressively worse.

Like Ashley I tried going back to school (I had already been in my 4th year of college before this mess hit me) but stress just blew my symptoms up...Eventually after trying to go back x number of times I had to give up schooling and settle with being uneducated.

It was an extremely hard pill for me to swallow.

It took months for me to find something that I could do with my time. Eventually I came across a volunteer position at the Morlock Foundation, and so far it's been good. I've been there for about 2 months now. emoticon



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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
2/16/13 11:29 P

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Hi, Ashley and Robin! Glad to have you here! Make yourselves comfortable on the boards!

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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GENKI_WARRIOR's Photo GENKI_WARRIOR SparkPoints: (50,174)
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2/15/13 3:22 P

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WOW I didn't think there was a team for schizophrenia on spark (yay)!

I'm Robin. I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder in 2012 after having four psychotic "episodes" (I call them trips). I had lost all my weight (70 lbs), and was halfway through training to be a yoga teacher! I'm still getting over the feeling that my life has been ruined. I live with my parents, now; so what little independance I had feels gone.

So I got depressed and gained all my weight back. I was living alone when I made all the healthy changes before; I don't know how I'm going to work up the motivation with pizza and cookies and ice cream and chips all around (and not very much healthy stuff).

On the brighter side!!:
I got the name genki_warrior from my yoga teacher via dvd, Duncan Wong; he says it means peaceful warrior (but I've heard it can mean energetic warrior, too).

My doctor and therapist say they are impressed with me in that I have a good grasp of reality, that my delusions don't seem to intrude upon me (I'm on Abilify).

I'm here (again); willing to make a change (any change), and hoping that will snowball into more changes, like last time!!

Take your MEDS: Moderation. Education. Dedication. Sublimation.

MWR=128-133lbs. MAINTAINING the new me since summer 2009!

winter 2012-13=aaaack! (I have schizo-affective disorder?!) My weight's back where I started?!


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SRH111189's Photo SRH111189 SparkPoints: (5,041)
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2/13/13 10:25 P

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Welcome Ashley! Your story is very similar to mine in many ways! Hope you find this forum to be of help to you! :)

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ZOMBUNNYASH's Photo ZOMBUNNYASH SparkPoints: (327)
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2/13/13 2:31 P

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Hi everyone, my name is Ashley,or Ash. I just turned 27 last week, and I'm from Nova Scotia, Canada.

I was diagnosed with schizophrenia in 2006, though I can remember things not being right for years and years before that. I never completely lost touch with reality, and I knew myself that things were wrong before I sought help.

In October of 2006 I was in college, and things were getting worse and worse. I was scared to get help, but it was either that, or end it myself. I decided to ask my best friend Anthony to take me to the hospital and he did. They put the two of us in a small room by ourselves because of the extreme anxiety I was having, and it was there that I finally told the first person in my life about what was going on.

Long story short, I've been on many different medications but have finally found one that doesn't give me too many side effects, and seems to be doing its job.

I've tried working, but each time I do I get stressed and my symptoms start to reappear. But I'm tired of seeing everyone around me succeeding, buying houses, living happy normal lives. So I've decided to go back to school. I have a meeting next Wednesday to learn more about the program I want to enter into. I'm excited and nervous!

My ticker weight is in pounds, not kilograms! ;)


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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
1/7/13 2:14 A

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Glad to have you SRH. I am glad you are finding yourself in a better place now. Looking back on those times can be really tough and scary. I think the best thing a therapist told me was that those delusions and things I said and did weren't me, they were part of the illness. Personally, I feel like my medical treatment between medication and therapy has given me back the best parts of me. You sound like a very positive person now and we are glad to have you.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
12/26/12 1:24 P

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SRH, it can't hurt you being on this team now can it? LOL I'm sorry that you are here in a way, but glad you came through your struggles wtih flying colors!!! I am happy to meet you. I hope you find luck on your weight loss journey.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


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SRH111189's Photo SRH111189 SparkPoints: (5,041)
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12/26/12 11:17 A

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I'm not sure if joining this sparkteam will do me any good but I am willing to make new friends! emoticon I was first diagnosed in August of 2008. I had went away to college for a week and I started doing some DEEP thinking and it just got me in trouble because I started being delusional. Like I thought my family had wanted me to go to college all along to be rid of me and that they didn't want me. :( I said some things during that time that I am sure people won't forget as long as they live. It was a pretty bad time in my life. My family came and got me from college the day before classes started and brought me home. They thought that they could help me if I were at home with them. Nobody had a clue what was going on with me. I wasn't eating, I wasn't sleeping and I wasn't taking a shower. A pediatrician thought she knew what it was and she was right in the end.....paranoid schizophrenia. She put me on medicine that made me faint everytime I tried to get up. I am lucky I didn't die because that medicine turned out to be VERY bad for me! But anyways.....within a week they took me to the psych ward of a major hospital 45 min away from where we live. I was there for two weeks being observed. Eventually they went with the diagnosis that the pediatrician diagnosed me with.....paranoid schizophrenia. It took me a whole year to recover form my psychosis where I would feel anywhere near normal and it took me a whole year after that to get on medicine that didn't make me a zombie all the time! But during that time I started college and I graduated back in May with my Associates in Office Systems Technology! ^_^ It was a happy day for me because despite my difficulties I managed to graduate with honors! Now i am fairly happy most of the time and sometimes i even forget that I do have schizophrenia! Now looking back over my life I can honestly say that having those difficult times(during my psychosis) and coming through them with faith was the best thing that could have ever happened to me!!! I wasn't a very good person on the inside before I had my "breakdown". So now I am glad that everything happened to me the way it did! I am much better off now than before I went through all of that! Anyways,......that is my story! ^_^ I will try and be active on yalls posts every week and be supportive of other members! emoticon May God bless everyone who reads this and I hope yall had a good Christmas and have a happy new years!!!

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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
1/25/12 1:52 A

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Lesley, You don't deserve to have this illness.. it strikes indiscriminately.. When I first learned my diagnosis had changed to schizoaffective disorder, my therapist recommended that I go to a support group.. I only went 2 or 3 times, but what I learned was that we were all good people.. We all had these tormenting voices hurting us and telling us we weren't good enough and didn't deserve things and in some cases controlling us for certain periods of time, and we all were sensitive caring, and good human beings. It was a group open to family and friends and one of the family members said he was struck by how, we all seemed to be such good people and it was hard for him to reconcile why something like this would happen to us.. and happen to people that were so good.. I don't have an answer for that. I don't think anyone does. But you do not deserve to be sick. Hold onto that if you can. It was one of the biggest gifts to learn that, that I received to help me get over the diagnosis and it helps me face the stigma that I face occasionally.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
1/23/12 8:23 A

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Lesley, if you are in counseling, and things that you haven't thought about get brought up-you will be in good hands already. What happens now if something gets brought up from the past? You have to struggle and deal all by yourself. Think of it as a positive thing. It may be negative for awhile until you feel each other out and get to know each other and you feel comfortable talking with him/her, but it will happen. If you don't feel comfortable after a few sessions, please ask for someone else. I dont know if that's possible for you, but I find it difficult to talk to someone I can't relate to. I went 6 months once talking to someone who didn't understand me and I felt so uncomfortable, I'd tell her what I thought she wanted to hear and run out of her office. Keep posting so we can keep up with you. Remember, we are here to support you, also!!

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


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LESLEYBLYTH's Photo LESLEYBLYTH SparkPoints: (2,758)
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1/23/12 5:31 A

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Thank you so much for your kind words and advice. I really could relate to what you were saying and have been to the doctors and arranged a cpn (community pshchiatric nurse) who will help give me counselling. I keep thinking and believing that I can achieve my goals on my own and deal with the past without letting it affect me on a daily basis but clearly I need help. However I am scared that the past will be brought up further and that i will remember other things which will haunt me. it also gets me annoyed and frustrated that i let these thoughts and voices control my head and that i get so obssessed that i take my frustrations out on other people - does that make sense?its like i'm trying so hard to make things better but i still have all the negative thoughts taking over which tell me that i deserve all this bad luck in my life and that i don't deserve to help myself let alone let anyone else help me. that probably sounds silly and pathetic but that is how i truley feel and believe about myself yet i know surely that i shouldn't be allowing this to happen. it is tiring and draining more than anything.

thanks again for5 advice and listening to me.

lesley xox


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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
1/9/12 11:39 P

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Hi Lesley,

I'm glad you are here.. that seems like quite a lot to deal with even beyond the sza (schizoaffective disorder).. It is not your fault! If anyone is going to hell it is him, but if he told you that you wouldn't have been scared to tell anyone. He was just serving his own evil self-interest, please don't still wonder about that.

I can appreciate the feeling worse in the long run.. I ate my treat food early this month and I didn't realize I would feel like such a failure afterward.

I hope you can lose the weight you want by your bridal day but you will be beautiful even if you don't, I'm sure.. still I know that that is hard to hear.. people tell me I'm beautiful now and I don't feel it I want to be thin beautiful, dagnabit!

I am on medication and am about ready to start therapy with an intern soon. I'm waiting for a phone call back to tell when I can start with her. My clinician kind of left the agency I go to for services last week. I hope you can get more therapy sometime.. it takes a while to have an effect sometimes but it can make a load of difference.. I still think I need it, but its gone a long way to convincing me that I'm okay and not a bad person. I hope sometime you will be able to see that you are not a bad or evil person as well and be able to leave some of the bad parts of your story as shadows or phantoms behind you: as being there and being shades, but not able to hurt you in the present and able to be banished.

Edited by: ISTRALOUISE at: 1/9/2012 (23:41)
"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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LESLEYBLYTH's Photo LESLEYBLYTH SparkPoints: (2,758)
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1/8/12 7:12 P

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thank you for your reply. I do not see councelors at the moment but I am on medication. I have seen counsillors and pyschiatrists in the past however, since moving to a new town I have not really seen anyone barr the doctor. I am determined to fight this and the issues which I have faced in the past but to be honest I am scared of what the future holds. I have so much worry and doubt about what has happened in the past and just wish I could wipe the slate clean and start over again. I really am hoping I do not let myself down and will lose weight for my forthcoming wedding as would like to get down to the size i was before i had to start taking meds - i put 6stone on in 4 months, so far I have lost about 2 stone. My weight is my biggest issue as if i have a bad day i turn to food or cigarettes and i want to break free from both of these issues as I am aware they make me feel worse in the long run. Thanks for wishing me all the best in my forthcoming wedding - 1 and a half years to go. I am determined I will be the beautiful bride i deserve to be on our special day. thanks for listening. xox


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WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
1/8/12 6:11 P

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Lesley, I'm glad you found this group. Do you see a counselor or psychiatrist? Are you on medication? It seems in your post that you have allot of issues still. You need to talk to someone if you are still having fears of going to hell from sexual abuse from long ago. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!! I'm glad that you have gotten so far and made so much progress, but you make it sound like you still have a way to go. Please keep us posted on what is going on. Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials. I wish the both of you the very best.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


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LESLEYBLYTH's Photo LESLEYBLYTH SparkPoints: (2,758)
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1/8/12 5:05 P

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Hi Iam Lesley from Scotland. I was diagnosed 7 years ago with schizoaffective disorder following a severe nervous breakdown which led me to be hospitalised for ten weeks and unable to work for over a year. Since my breakdown and spell in hospital in which I was sectioned I have worked with some really good medical professionals and am lucky to have a supportive network in my family and friends, however, I still struggle as i don't really think that people really know what it is like living with the condition on a day to day basis unless they have it themselves - even then I am aware that the condition affects everyone in its own unique way as everyone has there own story to tell and past history. When I was in hospital I had flashbacks of a boy a few years older than me making me touch him in the garden shed against my wishes - he told me i would go to hell - i believed him as his father was the local minister. Following this I developed bulimia and made myself sick upto 40 times a day from the age of ten - today I have it more under control although it does still flair up 21 years on - however I know do not make myself sick on a daily basis anymore although binging is an issue still. At school I was bullied due to the bulimia and my attempts to commit suicide through using solvents and taking an overdose. Fortunatly i survived this. However, the bulimia had a hold of me and during my university years I slept with x amount of men that I no longer can remember how many I have slept with. At one of my lowest points I considered selling my body on the streets and only stopped from doing it when a complete stranger talked me out of it. I fell pregnant but could not cope and made a decision I regret greatly. Following this the depression got worse and I got involved with cannibas. My boyfriend at the time was caught buying the drug abroad - I was with him at the time and was petrified. I didn;t know what was happening and the language I did not know. all i know was he went to court for 4 days of our holiday. On release the first thing he did was buy more and then took it through customs. A few months later his father died and my grandmother died two weeks later. The following month I lost my job with Coca Cola and was struggling with money issues which nearly made me bankrupt. As a consequence of all the stress I developed pychosis and took an overdose as a result. I was sectioned in hospital for ten weeks and was released just before christmas. unable to work my confidence and self esteem diminshed to nothing and I was a shadow of my former self. 7 years on since then I still struggle on a day to day basis but it is usually the opinions and views of other people which get to me and the name calling by others which hurt the most. However, I know see light at the end of the tunnel and am looking forward to moving into my new home in the next few weeks with my fiance who I am all set to marry in 2013. I have also been in constant employement for the past 5 years. There are many doubts I have about myself especially surrounding children and whether I would be a good mother and this is something i need to address but if i'm honest I am very scared to do so. I am a good person as I have raised thousands for charity both in my personal life and career, however most days I feel like a bad and evil person who will go to hell like i was told my the preachers son when I was ten.

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MRS420's Photo MRS420 Posts: 62
7/30/11 6:42 A

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._.

"Jesus is my savior, not my religion."

"Remind yourself that Martha Stewart didn't start Martha-ing until she was 41. Or that at 30, Suze Orman was a waitress"


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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
7/30/11 6:04 A

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Hi Mrs,

I know what you mean about losing with psych meds.. and I hope we can be that supportive place for you as we strive to become more active. Thank you for coming here and sharing.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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MRS420's Photo MRS420 Posts: 62
7/30/11 4:25 A

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Hi- I am new to this board. I am hoping I have found some good supportive friends who will know what I mean when I say "I'm having a hard time loosing because of my psych meds." From the looks of things, I think I have found the right place.

I am also hoping that this will be another place I can turn to when the voices/paranoia/anxiety/delusions/etc get too much and I just need a friend.

"Jesus is my savior, not my religion."

"Remind yourself that Martha Stewart didn't start Martha-ing until she was 41. Or that at 30, Suze Orman was a waitress"


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LIL-ANGEL-WINGS's Photo LIL-ANGEL-WINGS Posts: 492
7/5/11 5:27 P

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thank you

Romans 8:38-39

John 3:16

I Cor. 13

Rev. 1:7 Look! He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see Him, including those who pierced Him, And all the families of the earth will mourn over Him. This is certain! Amen!

lil-angel-wings.hubpages.com/

https://twitter.com/lil_angel_wings


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WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
7/5/11 5:23 P

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Angel, there are only a few of us that are active on this team. But they are very supportive. I'm sorry for the rough time that you have been going through. Death is not an easy thing to deal with. Emotionally, financially, etc. Sounds like you have been struggling, but it doesn't sound like you fell completely apart and that's a good thing.
As far as gaining weight, try restarting. Just start with your water for instance. Take it easy and quit beating yourself up about gaining a few pounds. I know 25 is alot, but you lost it once, you'll lose it again!!!! Stay positive. Keep posting.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


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LIL-ANGEL-WINGS's Photo LIL-ANGEL-WINGS Posts: 492
7/5/11 4:11 P

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hi.
I just joined the team today after going thru and changing all my teams. I felt like I needed to find teams that I truly fit in to and where people could truly understand me and who I could get support from. I was DX in 1998 with SA. I just went thru another episode in April and have since applied for SSD and have been off work since then also... I stopped taking my meds last Sept. after loosing 95lbs and doing great then in Jan of 11 my world started to fall apart. We found out that our cat had cancer he was 11 years old and I'd had him since he was a kitten. In feb. we found out that my mother-in-law had cancer. in march we lost her and the first part of april we had to put the cat down. Then we had to put my father-in-law in to a care facility because he has Alzheimer's. I was and still am taking care of all the finances and all of his things along with doing the funeral and all the financial things that had to be done when my mother-in -law passed. also selling the house and all of their possessions.

It was more then any one person should bare under normal mental health. i suppose if I'd not quit my meds, I could have dealt with it better. Needless to say I ended up in the phyc ward again. ( it happens about every 2 years for me) I had so many things going on in my head and of course all the wonderful screaming voices telling me all the horrible ;things that they could tell me that I just couldn't take it anymore, and I have put 25lbs of the 95 back on. I had maintained my goal weight for 9 months. so of course I am now extremely depressed and finding it hard not to binge eat and stuff my emotions down with all the guilt and fears of never being able to loose it and I just keep watching the scale go up, up, up.

I'm hoping that I can find support here, even ;though there is not an active leader at this time. I like the fact that the team is small, I think that its kind of like going to a small church... you just feel more at home and supported more by the other members.

well I guess that's all for now emoticon

Romans 8:38-39

John 3:16

I Cor. 13

Rev. 1:7 Look! He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see Him, including those who pierced Him, And all the families of the earth will mourn over Him. This is certain! Amen!

lil-angel-wings.hubpages.com/

https://twitter.com/lil_angel_wings


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WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
6/27/11 9:26 A

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Hello. I'm Oona. One of the active members along with Eden. I was diagnosed with schizo-affective disorder about 10 years ago. I was orignially diagnosed with bi-polar at the age of 13. I had my first psychotic break at age 29. I'm 39 now. My wife has been super supportive even though she didn't understand at first, but she stayed with me. We've been together almost 20 years now. I tried so hard to hide from her about what was happening but she wasn't fooled and told me I needed more help than she could give me. Do you have a support system? I can only imagine how tough it is to go through this alone. I'm glad your doc is keeping ukp with your meds. Just don't forget to take them!! LOL Hope to see you around.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


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6/27/11 8:54 A

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Hi, Brie. I'm Eden. Welcome and thanks for sharing your story. There are only a couple of us that post to this team, but it's nice to have the support from people with schizophrenia (or one of its many variations). I also belong to 2 bipolar teams, 2 depression teams and an anxiety team, but if I am psychotic, this is the first place I turn. I hope to see your posts in the future. Take care. ~ Eden


Sometimes even to live is an act of courage – Lucius Annaeus Seneca

The biggest gift of being unambiguously mentally ill is the time I’ve saved myself trying to be normal.


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NOTAFUNCTION's Photo NOTAFUNCTION Posts: 9
6/27/11 6:04 A

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Hi, I'm Brie. I don't know how active we are in here but I thought I'd introduce myself anyway :)

I've been diagnosed with Bipolar since I was 15, about 13 years ago. Recently things just started falling apart dramatically...hearing voices, seeing things that weren't there, dissociating and having trouble speaking and comprehending. My doctor talked to me about the schizophrenia diagnosis, but she wasn't specific about how it fit with the bipolar...I'm assuming this makes me schizoaffective. This is all pretty new for me.

For the bipolar I am on lithium, lamotrigine, phenelzine, and propranolol...my doctor added prolixin and artane at my most recent appointment to curb the psychosis. So far not much result, but it's only been a few days, so I'm still hoping. She wasn't confident I could handle the transition outpatient so I'm trying to hang on tight and avoid the hospital if I can.

This is pretty confusing for me, and it's nice to be around people who've been there and will understand...I hope there are still some lurkers in here :)

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SLUDERCATS's Photo SLUDERCATS Posts: 1,716
3/4/11 2:56 P

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Welcome to the Butterfly team! I have not been as active on this team as i would like to be but i'm looking forward to getting to know you better. We can face this together. Have not met a lot of the others on this team yet but hopefully we can get the support that we need here.

Gayle

Gayle

"Remember, no-one can make you go to the very beginning and make a brand new start but anyone can start here and make a brand new end."


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WONDEROONA's Photo WONDEROONA Posts: 3,260
3/4/11 11:51 A

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Hi. I'm Oona. I was diagnosed about 10 years ago with schizo-affective disorder. I just learned that it is a form of schizophrenia even though in the hospital I was told it wasn't. I was having a panic attack at the time about my diagnosis and I think they told me that to calm me down. Lying to me wasn't a good idea. I'm doing very good. I'm on klonopin, welbutrin, buspar, paxil, and invega. They help me very much. I'm in school right now. This is my last year and I plan on going back to work after school. I have a supportive wife who goes to therapy with me to try and understand my disease. I'm thankful for that. Hope to meet some of you soon.

"The reason that people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they have to go instead of how far they have gotten."~Unknown


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SLUDERCATS's Photo SLUDERCATS Posts: 1,716
1/22/11 9:58 A

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Hi, I am new to this group and would like to introduce myself. I joined Spark people two years ago but was very inactive for two years. I rejoined at the beginning of January. Yesterday i found this group.

I struggle with Major Depression and a Dissociative Disorder. Last year while in treatment i was diagnosed with Schioz (sp?) affective disorder. I do not know very much about this disorder and would like to learn more.

I am 50 years old and live in Alabama. I am on medication for my depression and in therapy for the DID.

Looking forward to getting to know some folks here so that i can learn more about this new diagnosis. I hope that i have found the right team to be active on.

Gayle

Gayle

"Remember, no-one can make you go to the very beginning and make a brand new start but anyone can start here and make a brand new end."


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MEMORIESOF2011's Photo MEMORIESOF2011 Posts: 21
1/18/11 5:39 P

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Hi there,
I'm new to the group, but not to SparkPeople. I wrote a blog today covering my story, but here's the short version:
My boyfriend was recently diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, anxiety, and depression. We've known each other for 10 years, dated for a short period of time after four, been a part of each others' lives off and on for the past six, and reconciled this month. I'm very new to understanding what goes on in the mind of a schizophrenic, but learning something about it every day.
My hope is that by being here, I can meet other people with it or other people affected by it to offer my support. I don't know much, but I am willing to try to understand.
Cheers,
Amy

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MGOLLADAY1's Photo MGOLLADAY1 Posts: 244
6/1/10 11:24 A

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Hi everyone! My husband has schizo-affective disorder. We've been together for 6 years and he's had it since he was a kid, but I still have problems understanding what's going on. He hasn't been medicated since 2005, because that was when we lost our insurance and we couldn't pay for the anti-psych meds. He's managed very well up until 6 months ago. We got married, moved into a new house, and that's when he snapped. Well, he didn't snap, he just got very quiet, then quit his job, quit showering, and told me to leave him. I guess I'm here to find some friends that can help me understand what might be going through his head.

Central


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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
4/15/10 9:51 A

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welcome to the group!

i have three kids myself but they are all older now....

i know you might have heard that abilify doesn't cause weight gain but it actually does......

it is hard enough with a mental illness to motivate yourself to work out and stuff.... and then you have to take a medication that makes you hungry for bad carbs!

best of luck to you in reaching your weight loss goals.....

hugs,
jamesgirl

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MKDEES Posts: 1
4/15/10 3:37 A

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Hello. I'm new to this team and also SparkPeople. Well yes and no. My husband signed me up for SP years ago when he was using it to lose a few pounds, but I never got into it until now. That's because my weight was always 120 lbs. until this past year. I've gained 40 lbs thanks to Lamictal. I have schizoaffective disorder and depression. I'm a busy mom of 3 and we are military, so finding time to stay healthy is a challenge (especially with a mental disorder). I can't get off the Abilify, but did quit the Lamictal a month ago. Bad part is... I've still gained weight in the past month. I'm working out at home daily and at the gym a few times a week, keeping my calories around 1500 / day, and trying to get enough sleep. Enough about me... I will be praying for us all in this team. Take care & God bless. ~

Edited by: MKDEES at: 4/15/2010 (03:38)
MELZIEMEL Posts: 10
10/24/09 12:52 A

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Hey, my names Mel. I'm new here. I was recently diagnosed with schizophrenia and looking to lose 6kg before my 21st bday on Dec 7. That means I'm aiming to lose a kg a week. I have gluten sensitivities so I'm on a gluten-free diet. I've heard spark people is a great source of motivation for those trying to lose weight. Wish me luck!

PAZAMORALEGRIA Posts: 5
6/22/09 2:09 P

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Yes, motivation is key and by having others bolstering us up when we're down, our goals will be easier to reach.

My diet (not the D-word (DIET, aaaah) needs some serious retooling. Like now, I just ate some ice cream. I've cut down the portions but I need to limit that shizz to once or twice a week.

If you need a shout out, Jamesgirl, call on me. Got your back.

Peace,
G

JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
6/21/09 7:50 P

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i have missed our chats as well!

i think we should all on this group try to motivate and uplift each other.. losing weight is hard... changing one's lifestyle is hard!

this time i am thinking of this as a lifestyle change and not a diet that i need to get away from and have treats on occasion.. my treats will be within the framework of The Thrive Diet.....

it is a mostly raw vegan diet.....

which pleases my husband to no end..that i have settled on this.....

and it is gluten free so that will help with eliminating some of my sz symptoms....

hugs,
jamesgirl

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PAZAMORALEGRIA Posts: 5
6/19/09 3:11 A

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Hi, Jamesgirl!

It's great to see you again! I've missed our chats. I hope everything is going well, especially after the surgery. I saw your discussion about this site on sz.com and decided to give it a try. I'm trying to lose 50 lbs to be at a healthy weight for my size (I'm 5'3"). I've started going to a gym and cut out most of the sweets I ate in the past. Maybe we can try motivating each other to reach our respective goals?

I wish you lots of success.

Peace,
Georgia

JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
6/18/09 3:46 P

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Paza!

its me jamesgirl from www.schizophrenia.com and mindsz.com!

you are more than welcome here!

it is good to see you friend....

hugs,
jamesgirl

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PAZAMORALEGRIA Posts: 5
6/18/09 1:59 P

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Hi, just wondering if it is all right to join? I will introduce myself if it's ok. Take care!

ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
3/15/09 9:18 P

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You are so right. So the risk is a big one.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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INKYPINKY's Photo INKYPINKY Posts: 52
2/28/09 5:24 A

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It was my brother that warned me not to let anyone know about my illness, even if I get on really well with someone. Once you have mentioned it, it can never be taken back, regardless of whether the reaction is a good or bad one.

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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
2/28/09 2:24 A

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I can relate to you not wanting work to find out. If I ever go back to work again I probably won't let them know unless my mental health agency does the outsourcing for me.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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INKYPINKY's Photo INKYPINKY Posts: 52
2/26/09 1:19 A

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Thanks Jamesgirl emoticon emoticon

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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
2/25/09 5:47 A

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welcome to the group!

i understand there is so much stigma still associated with being mentally ill.......

so only share what you feel comfortable about....

huuuuuuuggggggggggsssssssss
jamesgirl

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INKYPINKY's Photo INKYPINKY Posts: 52
2/25/09 3:32 A

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Hi, I have paranoid schizophrenia. I was diagnosed a few years ago after a serious suicide attempt. I have had symptoms since my teenage years, hallucinations (seeing, hearing, feeling and smelling things), severe depression but never got a diagnosis until things got very bad for me. When I was a teenager I told my mother that I had seen an angel watching me, and another time when I was walking down the street I saw a completely different scene, she told me that I was psychic. All I can say now is that it was a great relief to have a diagnosis which explained everything, and then to get treatment to help reduce the symptoms.

My worst symptom is hearing really horible/critical comments being made about me and people laughing at me.

I take Seroquel 400 mg a day, Epilim 700 mg a day plus medicines for a heart condition and migraines.

I find it rather hard to type personal stuff in case someone recognises me. But also it is great to be able to share experiences....One of my greatest dilemmas....nobody apart from my close family and one friend knows about my illness. I fear that I will lose my job if anyone finds out.

The Seroquel helps me so much, I am now able to work part time, but it also has made me gain a terrible amount of weight, and my Triglyceride level is through the roof. I am hungry all the time, I even get up in the night to snack.

I am so pleased to be able to join this group. Thank you for being here. emoticon

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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
2/11/09 3:38 A

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Hi, I also have schizoaffective disorder and was told my diagnosis had changed to that 2 years ago. I take Lexapro and Wellbutrin for the depression and Risperdal for psychosis..

It's good to have you here!

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
2/9/09 9:39 A

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welcome to the board.....

i also take abilify..along with other meds.....

hugs,
jamesgirl

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KRESKA's Photo KRESKA Posts: 493
2/8/09 10:43 P

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Hi, just wanted to introduce myself. My name is Victoria (or Wiktoria in polish), a friend of mine told me about this website and everyone seems really friendly and helpful so far. I've been diagnosed (after many hospitalizations and different diagonisis) with schizoaffective last year. I currently take Cymbalta and Abilify, and they work well for me, but I also go to therapy. As to weight, it has always been jumping up or down, right now I am overweight because of my lifestyle and possibly the Abilify. But I am hoping to change that! And I am glad I found your group aswell. Greetings,

Victoria

"You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you." - Isadora Duncan
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars!" - Les Brown


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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
1/29/09 12:53 P

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both the forms i do are a type of hatha yoga too but lately i have become interested in trying Kundalini and there is a Kundalini school that is much cheaper than the studio i go to now.... so it is very tempting....

hugs,
jamesgirl

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KINDOFLIKEYOU's Photo KINDOFLIKEYOU Posts: 5
1/29/09 12:07 P

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i do hatha yoga sometimes. i mostly prefer kundalini yoga. i know some people say it can trigger psychosis, but i haven't noticed anything like that. it gives me a lot of energy, though.

JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
1/29/09 8:17 A

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thanks Fizzy,

yeah i am thrilled about my triglycerides !

what kind of yoga do you do? i like hot yoga (not Bikram just hot 26 yoga) and anusara and Iyengar yoga...

hugs,
jamesgirl

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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
1/29/09 12:15 A

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Hi and welcome! Like JamesGirl said we are trying to become more active.

Exercise really helps me when I actually do it. I just came off a two week cold and still haven't gotten back to it.

It really helps me pep up and feel better, and it helps me sleep since I'm no longer on sleep aids.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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KINDOFLIKEYOU's Photo KINDOFLIKEYOU Posts: 5
1/27/09 2:36 A

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thank you for the welcome!

yoga has helped me more than medication, for the most part. it helps so much with stress and just centering my mind.

good work lowering your triglycerides! you must be proud of that. you should be!

seroquel made me gain weight at a higher dosage, without the zonegran and moban. they help even things out.

i'm glad to be here!

JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
1/26/09 8:50 P

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welcome to the group! we are trying to become more active and more involved in discussions now.....

its a small group...but everyone is very nice.....

i do find that doing yoga helps me mentally and physically.... i think the better shape that i get in...the less medication i might need...

right now i am on 6 psych drugs.....and then a couple for arthritis and my lower back pain.....

i did have high triglycerides but lowered them through diet and exercise... now i don't have to have cholesterol medication anymore....

seroquel made me gain weight..... i hope that doesn't happen with you......

anyway...thanks for posting and i am so glad that you are a member of this group!

hugs,
jamesgirl

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KINDOFLIKEYOU's Photo KINDOFLIKEYOU Posts: 5
1/26/09 5:17 P

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I don't know how active this group is...
i figured i would introduce myself, anyway.

I've struggled with a lot of different things since i was very young, which I don't really need to go into detail here. When i was 12 i became extremely depressed and would eat nothing for days, maybe weeks...then suddenly binge. I would purge by exercise. I was treated for depression until sometime in 2006 when it just stopped.

I had a psychotic episode in the beginning of 2007, diagnosed with schizophrenia. And that's just about it. I've been struggling with the voices and everything since then.

I'm on Seroquel 200MG(was on 800MG, TOO sleepy), 20MG Moban, .5MCG Ativan PRN, 200MG Zonegran...that's all i remember right now for psychiatric stuff! the meds are okay. these cause the least side effects for me with the most results, which is still very little.

does anyone else find keeping physically fit helps your mind?

JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
9/2/08 5:12 A

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hello Angela Lynn,

welcome to the group....

i have schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type and PTSD and generalized anxiety disorder and dysthmia (but they called me dysthmic when i was already on an antidepressant..in case somebody doesn't know what dysthmia is...it is a low grade continous depression)

anyway....i do okay on my meds too.. but i still have some magical thinking...some superstitions....etc....

hugs,
jamesgirl


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DESIGNSUNIQUE's Photo DESIGNSUNIQUE Posts: 10
9/1/08 8:14 P

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Hello, my name is Angela Lynn. I have been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. As long as I stay on my medication (Zyprexa) I don't have any problems. I do have problems seeing, hearing, and feelings things when I'm off my medication or haven't slept in a while.

I've also been diagnosed with bi-polar and PTSD.

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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
8/17/08 12:25 A

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Welcome! I have schizoaffective disorder too.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
8/15/08 11:42 A

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welcome to the group!

jamesgirl

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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
8/15/08 11:42 A

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yeah yoga is a real pick-me-upper.....

and i use meditating on my breath to tame racing thoughts when i am trying to go to sleep...

jamesgirl

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LIL_PINKBUBBLE's Photo LIL_PINKBUBBLE SparkPoints: (10,579)
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8/14/08 1:14 A

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Hi - I have vacillated between diagnoses of bipolar and schizo affective disorder, which I'm currently diagnosed with. I'm glad to have found this group.

Volunteering is the rent you pay for your space on earth!


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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
8/13/08 9:03 P

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Isn't it the most awesome thing :) I love mine. emoticon

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
8/10/08 7:42 P

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i have a yoga for stress relief video also... :)

jamesgirl

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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
8/10/08 7:04 P

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Right now I haven't been doing much exercising. When I do its walking or Walk Away the Pounds or Yoga for Stress Relief

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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JAMESGIRLLL's Photo JAMESGIRLLL Posts: 1,900
8/10/08 2:30 P

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hello..i am jamesgirl... i am 39 years old and diagnosed with schizoaffective bipolar type..and PTSD and generalized anxiety disorder, and dysthmia ( a low grade depression)

i am on wellbutrin XL 450 mg, Trazadone 300 mg, Geodon 160 mg, abilify 10 mg, atarax 25 mg, and provigil 100 mg... or maybe it is 200... i forget....

anyway....i just recently was able to go off risperdal after being on it for a few years.... at the same time i went raw vegan and i have been losing weight ever since...

i like to do yoga......it is my main form of exercise.....

how do you like to exercise?

jamesgirl

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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
5/6/08 6:02 P

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Eww.. how long have you been sick, Fusion?

And I know how that feels.. I went to the doctor on Friday and had ballooned up to 215. But I've been eating a lot of high sugar high fat foods without moderation, so I shouldn't be surprised.

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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REBA1058's Photo REBA1058 Posts: 5,594
5/6/08 7:32 A

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I don't know if I'm losing any weight. I don't have a scale to weigh on. The last time I weighed in at my doctor's office, I had gained 11 pounds in 2 weeks. But I know it is some of my medicine that is causing me to gain weight.

(¨`•.•´¨) ~ Reba
`•.¸ (¨ `•.•´¨)
(¨`•.•´¨) ¸.•´
`•.¸.•´
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I quit smoking Oct. 11, 2008!! Woohoo!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Do a little more each day than you think you possibly can." ~Lowell Thomas
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SKYBLUEFUSION's Photo SKYBLUEFUSION SparkPoints: (0)
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5/6/08 4:04 A

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I'm actually losing weight faster than I thought I would but I'm not actually happy about that because I'm losing the weight from being so sick I can't keep food down most days (like today...yuck!).

-Blue


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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
5/6/08 2:46 A

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Welcome to you both! I had no idea that the team idea would get a response so fast! I thought I'd be out here by myself for probably months at the very least.

Where are you guys on your weight loss journeys?

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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SKYBLUEFUSION's Photo SKYBLUEFUSION SparkPoints: (0)
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5/4/08 8:26 P

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Hi, I was diagnosed as depressed in 2000 after an almost successful OD. Later my diagnosis was changed to schizoaffective and borderline personality disorder. I've been on many many different combinations of meds for my mental illnesses but am currently not on anything. My doctor and I decided that since nothing was helping and I had gone wtithout meds for a short while due to not being able to pick them up and was feeling a little better.
Physically I've been ill for months. I just had my gallbladder removed but are still having the same symptoms and go to a gastroenterologist thursday.
I have good friends but no one I can talk about mental illness with.

-Blue


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REBA1058's Photo REBA1058 Posts: 5,594
5/4/08 8:24 P

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Hi ... I'm Reba. I've been diagnosed with bipolar/schizo affective disorder, along with other disorders. I was diagnosed with the schizo affective disorder because I have visual and auditory hallucinations. I hear voices and music and see things, like Terry says, a flit in the corner of my eye. Sometimes I get the feeling that someone is standing close to me but when I turn there is no one there.

The combination of meds my pdoc has me on has helped me a whole lot. They are: Lamictal 200mg at bedtime, Seroquel 150mg 3 times a day, Lexapro 10mg in the morning, Vistril 150mg 3 times a day and Geodon 40mg twice a day.

(¨`•.•´¨) ~ Reba
`•.¸ (¨ `•.•´¨)
(¨`•.•´¨) ¸.•´
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I quit smoking Oct. 11, 2008!! Woohoo!!
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"Do a little more each day than you think you possibly can." ~Lowell Thomas
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ISTRALOUISE's Photo ISTRALOUISE Posts: 1,597
4/19/08 8:31 P

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Hi,

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My username is IstraLouise but you can call me Terry. In high school I would cut out meals or cut down portions because even when my family thought I was too skinny I felt too fat. All the time, since I started trying to lose weight I started to gain weight. In Community College at 132 I finally decided enough was enough and joined a Church-based weight loss clone of Weight Watchers called Weigh to Win. Only now that I'm older, am over 200 pounds and am being more reasonable about my weight am I starting to see the pounds shed slowly.

I was initially diagnosed with depression in 2003. I ended up in the hospital after a second suicide attempt. In 2007 my diagnosis was changed to schizoaffective disorder due to intermittant episodes of auditory hallucinations. That is schizophrenia and a mood disorder. In my case, severe clinical depression.

My change of diagnosis came as a shock, since I'm not what I would typically think of when I think of schizophrenia. I function fairly well with the help of friends and a fiance and I haven't had a crisis of any type since 2004, and I think I look and seem rather normal to most people. I hope I'll still be welcome here to talk about my depressive symptoms or experiences.

I'm on two anti-depressents, Lexapro and Wellbutrin, and an anti-psychotic Risperdal. The only way my medication changed in 2007 is we upped the Risperdal I take each day by 1 milligram.

I've been using spark people on and off for about a year. I found it after it was mentioned on a LiveJournal (blog site) community called 100pounds2lose.

I started the community after realizing that my diagnosis no longer really fit sharing the whole thing in my Dealing with Depression SparkTeam and that I was unsure the kind of response I was going to get by disclosing my illness.

I named it Butterfly People because that's what the illness reminds me of. Flitting thoughts, voices, and sights that flit just on edge of sight. Something that almost compells the person to follow them. Fantastic and beautiful or dark and horrible thoughts and ideas that are distracting even on largely effective medication. They flit and beg and beckon the person afflicted to follow them.

My profile image is Mary, Queen of Mercy. This isn't a religious thread but the image is special to me, because Mary seems almost to be listening to the words swirling around her head and it seems a bit surreal with all the gold, dove, and crown.

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I hope everyone who seeks finds a place here.

It's good to meet everyone.
Theresa

"Istra Starchcatcher (Hufflepuff)
Just call me Istra or Izzy for short"
x ✔♪✄
Challengers Of Hogwarts TriTerm 567 - House Hufflepuff!


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