Thank you for posting this. This is exactly how I feel and it is the main trigger for my panic and anxiety. My attacks will often come frequently and then will dissipate for a period of time - only to shock me with their return months later.
I have horrible fears about getting stuck somewhere. I hate being a passenger and it alone often creates severe anxiety symptoms. Then, if we're going somewhere I "have" to stay - such as a doctor's appt, the fear multiplies. I only let people I truly trust drive, and I know they'd always bring me home if I asked, but it doesn't seem to help the symptoms.
I often have fear about work. I work 12 hour shifts as a nurse and although I "can" leave - it is obviously frowned upon. I work in a very busy ER - it's a good thing because it keeps my mind very occupied but the anticipatory anxiety of going into work is very powerful. I'm requiring a dose of xanax almost every work morning now. It's very disappointing to me that I can't "handle" it on my own but I don't know what else to do.
Christmas was a huge trigger - especially visiting family. I felt like I "had" to stay, was too far from home, etc. Very very few people seem to understand this fear. It's not really agoraphobia - I'm not "afraid to leave my home" - it's totally situational. If I'm under my own power, close to home, I'm fine.
Other than the xanax taking the edge off - I haven't found too many tools yet to help me with this unique ordeal. I just recently started with a therapist to see if she can help me. I've debated on a daily maintenance medication but everything I've tried so far has made me worse, not better.
Unfortunately I don't have much advice for you. I can only offer sincere support and best wishes. I really understand everything you're saying and you've helped me by identifying the same thing. Helps me to be a little more calm about it because there are other people who understand. Take good care of yourself.
Lyndsey - RN working on a change!
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says "I'll try again tomorrow".
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