well good for you you are doing this for yourself & I think being honest to yourself is also your no. 1 priority for yourself. We've all been there (not being honest to yourself) I did keep a food journal but failed to write down all my little extras. And had the nerve to say "why am I not loosing weight". Ha ha - but every day is really a challange - keep doing this for yourself & you'll succeed!!
Last year, I got my annual warning from my physician that I needed to lose weight and generally take better care of my body. He had me log a week's worth of food the prior year and my habits were pretty much the same. He talked me into trying phentermine for six months and I lost about 40 pounds (250 down to 210) over that time. I was very aware that most people who take this approach snap back to their original habits and end up doing the yo-yo thing. So during that time, I read up and reflected on the realities of my situation. I knew that when I completed my run of phentermine I would have to make long-term habitual changes.
Shortly after I was finished with the program, I stumbled back onto SparkPeople from a rather long hiatus. Originally when my wife told me about the website, I signed up and never did anything with it. Now I have recorded my daily food and exercise for the past several weeks and it feels great to really face my inner demons. I used to shamefully go to a vending machine and buy something sweet or otherwise fattening, trying to hide it from anyone who might be looking. You know, if I don't let anyone see the food, it's just like I'm not really eating it. How messed up is that? I'm certainly not a genius, but I'm also smart enough to know the logic of that is deranged. Now, if I do find myself going to the vending machine, I know exactly what I'm doing and I don't try to hide it. If I have honestly logged my diet and exercise, I have an honest understanding of its impact. I find that I also do so much less often. I think the mixture of knowing the truth and impact of my eating decisions with my much less frequent sweets attacks, result in lack of guilt when I do eat sweets. I don't have to feel badly about it since I'm no longer abusing my body by doing so.
I own my lifestyle now instead of my lifestyle owning me. I make more conscious daily decisions knowing that each one I make can change my habits for better or worse. Giving myself the ability to make more mindful decisions has afforded me confidence and better health. I bounced back to 215 over a month ago. I'm back to 210 and I'm in no rush to lose tons of weight. It will come off in it's own time. I'm living well and that's what really matters in the long run - right?
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