SparkPeople Fatherless Children Team Messageboard This team is for people who are missing their fathers through death, or abandonment. SparkPeople Fatherless Children Team Messageboard Fatherless Children (New member) My name is Melanie Louise Jackson aka (Grease31), <BR> <BR> I have joined this particular group, as the title suggests Fatherless Children, my Sister (Helen Suzanne Large), & Myself (Melanie Louise Jackson) aka (Grease31) lost our Dad (John William Large), to Cancer on Thursday 24th May 2002. <BR> <BR> It has been a long long time, & we all still miss him terribly, my Mum (Mary Louise Large), his beloved Wife, my Sister (Helen Suzanne Large), & Myself, (Melanie Louise Jackson) aka (grease... Thu, 15 Nov 2012 11:35:48 EST Lost my father to suicide Hello, I just found this team and I'm looking forward to meeting some new people. When I was 8 years old, my father committed suicide. It sucks. <BR> Sun, 6 Sep 2009 23:55:17 EST 5 years ago today... Today is the fifth anniversary of my dad being gone. He and my mom were on their way home from vacation when they were killed in a car accident. I talked to them the day before and next day... <BR> <BR> I miss my dad very much. His laughter and his jokes. He was one man that can remember a joke and tell it over & over. When my husband & I were looking for a new car, I wish Dad was with me. He knew so much about cars. I'm sure he's pleased with the car we bought, but the hard part was trading... Tue, 25 Aug 2009 11:39:59 EST I been missing... Anybody wanna co-lead this thing? I have few duties over here.. But it would be good if it was watched over when I am disappearing.. What do you think? <BR> <BR> Emma Sun, 5 Jul 2009 22:10:39 EST At A Loss As of yesterday when logging onto facebook, I saw a friend request and I was curious who could have been friending me. So I clicked on it and got the shock of my life, so much so that I had to walk away from the computer and out of the room. It was a rush of different emotions. It was my dad, the one man I had given up all hope on. My mom had gotten involved and stepped in and jumped his case about everything and put the ball in both our courts and left it at that. I did send him a message te... Tue, 31 Mar 2009 12:18:56 EST Presidents and Fathers Happy inauguration day! <BR> <BR> Do you realize that the last two Democratic Presidents, Clinton and now Obama, both grew up without fathers? <BR> <BR> I don't know what that means, but it gives me a lot of hope. Tue, 20 Jan 2009 11:24:15 EST Checking in Hi ladies <BR> <BR> Sorry I have been MIA for the past few months. I am pregnant again, so have not been using Sparkpeople at all. baby will be arriving in Feb/Mar, so I will definately be active again after she arrives. <BR> <BR> Hope you are all doing well <BR> <BR> Colleen Fri, 9 Jan 2009 13:34:26 EST Any one in South Florida? <link> </link> <BR> <BR> This is a free seminar on grief and loss. I'm going is anyone else. Free my favorite price. Sun, 4 Jan 2009 18:14:17 EST Lost father through abandonment Hi everyone, <BR> <BR> My name is Wendy. I'm a freelance writer in Denver. You can find my newest work at <BR> <link><BR>-Real-Estate-Examiner </link> . That's not the reason I've joined this team and it's not the reason I'm writing. <BR> <BR> My parents divorced when I was 10. My father was a dead beat dad and even though I always knew where he was, he never sent cards, he never called, he never visited. It took me many years to finally admit tha... Mon, 22 Dec 2008 12:15:21 EST My Uncle I know this is for fathers, but my uncle was a special man. After my dad died, he was by my side. He was in the hospital since Oct 2 for bleeding in the lungs and then was just diagnosed for leukemia. He was the rock in our family. He made us laugh, he helped me get an A in history so that I get my Associates Degree, he was the Cookie Monster which made me & my cousins laugh. When I brought Mark and his kids to meet him, he treated them like family and told me, "You finally found a keeper, ni... Fri, 19 Dec 2008 22:20:27 EST Paul Newman He was a good dad and watching the news about him makes me cry. <BR> <BR> Emma Mon, 29 Sep 2008 19:15:10 EST Memories I've been studying neurology and brain science. I read the book about the lady who had a stroke. And I've learned so much and it just struck me that father had had a brain injury and we used to tease him about his absent mindedness and he probably felt pretty stupid because of that. Mother is in my head and she has always encouraged these kinds of studies and I am sure she's whispering in my ear about what to study. I wish I'd had been kinder to father. I will be kind to everyone I can to m... Thu, 18 Sep 2008 12:34:29 EST Challenge - Cultivating Joy This is in response to one of those healthy reflections. I like to use good ideas. They talk about spending more time on the stuff that gives us joy. The first step being identifying what give us joy.. Let's take turns entering stuff that makes us joyful. I think of it as a non-pharmaceutical anti-depressant. <BR> <BR> Emma Tue, 12 Aug 2008 23:59:49 EST Not really sure how I feel about this one When my father passed away, my parents had the house up for sale. They had just finished paying for it the fall before (my father died in May) but Dad had it in his head to look for something else. At the time, Mom wanted to stay put. After he passed away, a lot of people asked Mom if she would move. She said no, and I am glad that she didn't move too quickly. Now, two years later, she has her house up for sale again. I'm not sure why it is hitting me in such a strange way. It makes sense... Mon, 30 Jun 2008 19:55:18 EST How to reach out to fatherless children? A friend of ours was riding his bike to work on June 1 and was hit by a car and died from head injuries 3 days later. He left behind a wife and three children, boy(12), boy(8), and girl(6). <BR> We live 8 hours away but would like to reach out to these children in some way. How can we show them we care? <BR> Thu, 26 Jun 2008 17:01:19 EST So GLAD to have found this team I lost my wonderful father two years ago in May. It must be fate that I found this team today through Emma's Sparkpage, because I dreamed about my dad last night for the first time in ages. It has been difficult for me to get over losing him and I look forward to being able to share with other people who are grieving a father. Tue, 24 Jun 2008 11:53:58 EST Warning - Father's Day... I was just reading a blog about how great someone's Dad is and I found it triggering. So watch out for triggers over this weekend... <BR> <BR> I miss him and it's been 38 years. How crazy is that? <BR> <BR> Emma Sat, 14 Jun 2008 13:05:18 EST A note from Coach Jen Hi Everyone <BR> <BR> We've started to have more of a problem recently with "chain" messages. For example, you're asked to send something along to 10 of your friends, and before you know it you're getting this same message (or a similar one) from lots of different people. <BR> <BR> I think a lot of these are very nice, but not everyone wants them. So we're going to ask that people stop forwarding these along- either as SparkMail messages or comments on SparkPages. Please pass the word along... Tue, 10 Jun 2008 14:43:23 EST Letting Go Of The Junk I will admit..i was lucky... growing up, my father was an alcholic... he also abused my mother.. my brother don't remember those times as he was still young... i can even remember calling the police on him..i can remember him passing out in the bathroom... i can remember those late nights having to go get him from the bar..there were many years, that i could honestly say i hated him for what he had my his family... he did sober up after my mom left him...and we was able to me... Thu, 5 Jun 2008 07:40:29 EST How Do You Know Your Father Is Close? Some may not believe this...but i really believe that though my father has passed away, he is still with me...there are times he feels closer than at other times..though yes, i think he is always there... so my question to you is... how do you know? <BR> <BR> i'll be making a seperate post on how i know..cause,'s another long one. Thu, 5 Jun 2008 06:59:33 EST Dealing With Others Grief While You Were Grieving I was reading a post that our wonderful Leader had made, and a couple questions struck me... How is your Mom handling it? How are you supporting her? Do you treat her differently? For was more than my mom i was helping go through this...but a whole family....and one of the things that i have not really dealt with...completely at least... to set the background of all this... about 9..10 years ago...i got a wasn't long until, though some other unforunate cercumstances, that ... Wed, 4 Jun 2008 20:08:36 EST A Dear Friend Lost her Father She's one of the strongest people I know. And she lost her Dad 2 days ago. She's an adult and realizes that his life was a gift to her, that she's lucky to have had him and all she wants to do is nothing. She was saying she'd got nothing done. I told her that she was doing exactly what she was supposed to do. Grieving takes time and effort and cannot be multitasked. You have to cry and write and process and it takes time... <BR> <BR> Her father's funeral is delayed for a week and she s... Sun, 1 Jun 2008 17:18:10 EST What Has Changed I was reading a book last year, can't recall the name, sorry :( but i can remember it saying that when daughters lose their father, that they themselves change or make changes in their life... usually major changes...some of you were probably too young to have these major changes...but then again...maybe not.. what changed in your life? purposely or even just a part of losing your father. Fri, 30 May 2008 09:43:54 EST How Did You Lose Your Dad? Though this can be a rough question to answer...reliving the memories...i also feel it's theaurputic to talk about it and share what memories you do have of that day...if you have any at all... how did you lose him? some i know was to death...others to him leaving... did you get to spend time with him? or was it before you had the memories of him? Fri, 30 May 2008 09:38:48 EST Heathy Reflections - Enjoy your trip! Right on: <BR> <BR> Stop living life for what's around the corner and start enjoying the walk down the street. <BR> <BR> - Grant L. Miller, motivational guru <BR> <BR> The healthy reflections e-mail today encourages us to enjoy the trip to health! I hope you will enjoy your trip to wellness! <BR> <BR> Emma Sun, 18 May 2008 15:39:23 EST Hello I lost my dad to cancer in June 2006 5 days after his & mom's anniversary. He went into the hospital Father's Day night. None of us even knew he had cancer until that night & he didn't know it until 2 days before he died. Half of one lung was gone, he had 2 tumors in his brain, one in his kidneys & liver, & possibly pancreas, but they didn't run any more tests. I think it started in his lungs as he was a heavy smoker for a lot of years, then metastasized (? spelling & I'm a medical transc... Sun, 20 Apr 2008 19:47:15 EST My son's father committed suicide..... <BR> I don't know where to begin. I lost my beloved husband shortly after he returned form Iraq. I know he loved me and my little son so much but, I don't understand how he could have left us like this. <BR> <BR> Since his death I have been lost, emotionally. However, I am doing well and I am taking excellent care of my son. I am proud to be a mother and I am enjoying it! However, my heart hurts so much and I get a bit lonely sometimes. <BR> <BR> I married a man a few months ago but, he ... Sun, 30 Mar 2008 02:43:26 EST Hi New Here Hi everyone just found this group, and im so glad i did. I lost my dad in March of 2007, and i havent been the same since. I was a daddy's girl and miss him dearly. He died way to young, he was only 51, and had so much to live for, if only he could of realized it. He passed away from bacterial meningitis, and even though he didnt cause it, he could have prevented it. See my daddy took care of everyone, but never himself. He had type 2 diabetes and hb pressure but didnt take care of hims... Thu, 27 Mar 2008 07:18:37 EST Healing Poetry I got this post on my blog from NewSharen <BR> <BR> Emma, <BR> I have this poem that I have rec'd from numerous people over the past few years when my loved ones have died. It has brought me great comfort. Holidays are always a time of reflecting about people are no longer with us. I hope it helps. <BR> <BR> <BR> I am standing upon the seashore. A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand an... Fri, 21 Mar 2008 11:07:43 EST Does Grief Effect your ability to get healthier? I think unresolved grief is part of what I am carrying in my mid section. I've been reading books saying this can be resolved. I believe that that is true. What do you think? Mon, 17 Mar 2008 12:22:32 EST I miss my Dad Hi and I too lost my dad 3 years ago. I also lost my mom. They were killed in a car accident and I'm still having trouble accepting it. You had a comment about being an orphan. Boy you hit that on the nail! I may be married, but I never felt so lost and lonely. People tell me that it will go away and yeah, 3 yrs later I'm still feeling like an orphan. Then in Sept 07, my in-laws were in a car accident. My father in law passed away in Dec from his injuries, luckily my mother in law recovered. ... Thu, 13 Mar 2008 21:42:47 EST my father my dad was born on october 6th 1936. he was born in barnsley england, but moved to kenya at the age of 5. <BR> <BR> he became a pilot at the age of 17, and flew for 50 years. <BR> <BR> my father passed from cancer on the 18th of novemeber 2004, after a short battle against stomach cancer. it was the worst 6 months, because his quality of life was terrible. they removed most of his stomach, but it was to late, and the cancer was spreading. to make matters worse, my mom was diagnosed with br... Wed, 5 Mar 2008 16:13:31 EST ? What do we want? Challenges? Icky Grief Talk? Silly stuff? What ever you want, just let me know. Comments? Smart Remarks? Plainspeaking Request? Fri, 29 Feb 2008 23:34:41 EST About Terry First off I'd like to thank everyone who responded. It's reassuring.. well perhaps that's not exactly it, but it's a better feeling to see others continuing on when a parent dies. <BR> <BR> I thought I'd leave a little bit about my Dad here. I hope that is ok. <BR> <BR> Terry, my father, met my Mom when there were in grade school. The story goes, he was so shy to ask out my Mother when they finally hit high school that he had to have his best friend ask for him. Only knowing my Dad in ... Sat, 9 Feb 2008 11:21:26 EST October 27, 2006 October 27, 2006 was when I lost my Dad. I am 28 now. He came to visit my husband and I, and his grandchilden. He suffered a massive stroke on the 20th. (The largest the doctor at the local hospital had seen in 37 years). We had him airlifted to Barrow's. The breathing tube was taken out on the 26th, he passed around just after noon on the 27th. I get rather choked up still. It feels like the floor was taken out from under our family. My two youngest will never remember the times with ... Fri, 8 Feb 2008 17:47:52 EST Challenge - What Dad Always Used to Say My Dad always used to say "I'll give you a reason to cry!" - that was NOT his best moment. The supernanny would be all over that crap! Thu, 7 Feb 2008 10:34:29 EST Challenge - Grief History I would like to challenge each one of us to list our grief history here. I'll go first and then I hope we will all join in. It's a rare person who's greiving only one issue. It helps to gain a perspective on why each new grief is ever harder. Fri, 1 Feb 2008 10:35:09 EST I hate asking people to Join.. One of my Spark friends who is not a member of this group lost her father early this morning. I'm crying for her. But I'm really in touch with my own loss. The never see him again realization and the Parents really die revelation. It's been a rough day for me. I want everyone to be all right. I know that I can't really make that possible for everyone in the world but I wish I wish I never needed to invite someone to join here. <BR> <BR> I need you guys of course because I have to come ... Sun, 20 Jan 2008 16:41:11 EST Are you an Orphan like me? I lost my Dad when I was 10 and mom 20 some years later so I am an orphan. It amazes me to meet people older than me with living parents. I think everyone is an orphan too. Isn't that silly.. They are lucky to be able to complain about their Dads don't you think? Wed, 9 Jan 2008 14:32:02 EST hi from denmark My boys miss their dad, we lost him to diabetes type 1 back in April 2004. Even as time goes by, the loss is hard as the boys are now pre-teenage and teenage and moms advice isn't always work the same as dad would say it. Any one know that feeling of not fitting in Dads shoes? Thu, 27 Dec 2007 02:07:00 EST Veterans My Dad was in World War II and I have been thinking about that. I wonder how he feels about me being a big ole pacifist. I've been watching "The War" on PBS and trying to figure out what he must have been through. From watching that it seems like he was just lucky to have survived everything. He worked as an airplane mechanic and I notice that they shot at the air stips a lot. I'm lucky to be here able to type this. If he hadn't survived I wouldn't exist. <BR> <BR> This movie disgust... Thu, 8 Nov 2007 10:23:41 EST I remember father Dad had a great sense of humor. He was always writing song parodys. He was famous for getting lost but I think he just wanted to get away and would go off. One time he went to the old house walked in and sat down and was there for a while until he realized that we didn't live there any more. Now a days the doors would be locked but back then they were not. I'm glad no one noticed him. <BR> <BR> When Dad was a boy he got into an accident with a Truck and got a severe brain injury. He w... Fri, 19 Oct 2007 14:37:45 EST