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AZULVIOLETA6's Photo AZULVIOLETA6 SparkPoints: (57,263)
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1/30/14 9:19 P

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Should or ought to aside, I think it is likely fine for your health but probably not great for dieting. For some reason wine causes me to gain weight out of proportion with the number of calories/carbs actually in the wine. Isn't a serving more like 3-4 oz though?

You just have to see if you can diet effectively AND consume wine or not.

Dances: salsa (standard/LA), casino, rueda de casino, cumbia Colombiana, bachata, mambo, cha-cha-chá, merengue, reggaetón.

Currently learning: Mexican cumbia, danzón, Cuban rumba

Dances to Learn in the future: flamenco, tango Argentino, samba, belly dancing, bhangra, ballroom rumba


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SASAHAMMER Posts: 129
1/30/14 10:34 A

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I actually had a similar conversation with a male trainer at the gym I go to. He advises his clients who are trying to lose weight to reduce their alcohol intake. He didn't understand how so many of his female clients claimed they NEEDED their glass of wine (or two) at the end of the day to relax.

Many women are so overcommitted to work and family obligations that they neglect to take care of themselves mentally/physically. Learning to say "no" can be a liberating experience. However it's not always possible to do that. When someone says they NEED a glass of wine at the end of the day, I think they're really saying they need something that comforts them. Finding those things require behavioral changes just like lifestyle changes related to nutrition and fitness. You just have to find what works for you and stick to it.

I love hot baths, good smelling soaps/lotions, foam rolling, basic yoga poses, and hot drinks. Then on the weekends, I enjoy two glasses of nice red wine.

I have a friend who now requires a BOTTLE of wine every night to relax. It's very sad.

SOAPSANDROPES's Photo SOAPSANDROPES Posts: 564
1/30/14 9:43 A

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I have a glass of wine pretty much every night becuase I really enjoy wine. However, I do not rely on it to relax me. I can take that same time and have a cup of tea or knit while watching tv and get the same effect. The issue becomes when you see the wine as an escape and you are struggling to get through the day holding onto the thought of the glass of wine. It isn't the wine that is the problem it is what the wine has come to mean and the dependence on it to be able to relax.

Try to take a few days and see if you can do other things with that time, read a book, watch tv, listen to music, go for a walk, so something else that you enjoy.



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CALLMECARRIE's Photo CALLMECARRIE Posts: 1,598
1/24/14 9:11 P

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I don't know if this is helpful, but sometimes I check out for a half hour or so by telling my family I'm going to walk on the treadmill. Which I do, but it almost seems like the point of it is not the exercise but the mental space, just 30 minutes with a few relaxing songs on the i-pod, not necessarily walking very fast, just relaxing and thinking about nothing. No one argues with you -- because it's a treadmill, everyone knows exercise is a good thing. But the relaxation is the object, not really the calories burned. It may sound like "work," but it's actually kind of a happy hour. And exercise is a natural stress-reliever.

"I owe everything you see here to spaghetti."

-Sophia Loren


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ICEDEMETER's Photo ICEDEMETER Posts: 765
1/24/14 6:52 P

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MissRuth ---

Thank you so much for this:

"Just letting go of all the "need to" "ought to" "should do" "have to" stuff for a while. And focusing, really focusing, on something that is just so fabulous simply because it is."

I've never seen it worded so well.

Thanks again!

Start weight: 240 lbs
Goal weight: 155 lbs (reached March 7, 2014)
Revised Goal weight: 150 lbs (reached May 27, 2014)

Afraid of a colonoscopy? Believe me - they are much less frightening than surgery and chemotherapy.

Colonoscopies allow polyps to be removed before they can become cancer, or let cancers be found before they are too widespread. If you are 50 or older, or have any symptoms, please don't let fear stop you from covering your butt.

Get checked!


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MISSRUTH's Photo MISSRUTH Posts: 3,423
1/24/14 5:52 P

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According to the Mayo Clinic website, "moderation" (for wine drinking) would be 5 oz. per day for a woman.

Also they note "No one should begin drinking or drink more frequently on the basis of potential health benefits." hmmmm. I don't know if "stress relief" would be considered a potential health benefit. Sounds sort of like it, to me. But I think they were referring to how red wine is supposed to be good for you, etc.

The really slippery slope is that..... one day you're going to hit something really stressful, and the 6-8 oz. isn't going to cut it. So..... do we go ahead and try another 6-8 oz? If for some reason the wine isn't available, are we going to be even more stressed because we haven't got our "stress reliever"?

idk. Personally I think you're better off exploring other ways to relieve stress. I find, when I'm stressed, that finding something beautiful (and it doesn't have to LOOK beautiful, it can smell good or feel good) and taking a few minutes to enjoy it, really helps. Could be lighting some scented candles. In the summer, it could be going out to the flower beds and cutting a bunch of blooms to bring in the house. Could be taking a bubble bath. Could be simply standing at the kitchen window and watching the birds coming to the feeder. Or just looking at the sky or the leaves on whatever that shrub is out there in the yard that looks all silvery when the wind is blowing. Could be what the pp's mentioned... pampering your hands and feet, savoring a piece of chocolate. Just letting go of all the "need to" "ought to" "should do" "have to" stuff for a while. And focusing, really focusing, on something that is just so fabulous simply because it is.

Ruth in Cookeville, TN Central Time Zone


Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think - Christopher Robin to Pooh


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SIMPLYME80's Photo SIMPLYME80 Posts: 406
1/24/14 5:51 P

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My husband does the same, but only after a stressful day, not daily.

Highest weight-340+
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EELPIE's Photo EELPIE Posts: 2,669
1/24/14 5:35 P

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My Dad is 80, and still works (he's a workaholic). His whole adult life, he has ended the day with a glass of wine. It's just how he ends his work day.

The best exercise in the world is to bend down and help someone up.


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DIDS70's Photo DIDS70 Posts: 5,070
1/24/14 5:15 P

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i'd be afraid that you are becoming dependent as well. I like a glass of wine every now and then.


:)


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BUNNYKICKS's Photo BUNNYKICKS Posts: 2,299
1/24/14 4:36 P

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I guess the thing to contemplate would be, is your situation one of:

"wine - a good glass of wine is nice to relax with"

vs

"wine - can't relax without."

I'm in Icedmeter's camp on wine. I enjoy it "sometimes" as a treat, it's like my dessert, I enjoy trying different kinds, i never drink much at any one time, i never get drunk and so rarely drink enough to notice the physical "relaxing effect of alcohol" - i enjoy the taste of it as something nice to sip with cheese, something to "wind down the day, curl up on the sofa, chat and sip wine." When someone brings me a bottle of wine, I'll open it and drink it over a period of a few days.... once it's gone, i might not open another bottle for days or weeks. I can take it or leave it, the same way I can take or leave peanut butter. Nice to indulge in a little bit when the mood strikes, no biggie if i run out. Thus I am not currently concerned about it. If I started finding that the wine was becoming a "requirement" more than an "optional extra" I would take a closer look at whether I should be reconsidering how I used it.

Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)


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ICEDEMETER's Photo ICEDEMETER Posts: 765
1/24/14 4:04 P

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Well, my doctor recommended decades ago that I enjoy a glass of wine every evening, and I did so for many years. Neither him nor I ever worried about me "becoming dependent" on it, and I never did "become dependent". It was a pleasant ritual that signaled a change from the rush of the day to the serenity of the evening, a fun hobby to find and sample new wines, a chance to sit and savour something that I enjoyed, and it worked well for me. It never became a "must do" thing - always just a "this is nice when I can" thing.

Whether it is a healthy thing for you must be decided between you and your doctor - nobody on a message board can tell you one way or another.

If you're worried about the alcohol, or just don't enjoy it that much, or your doctor doesn't think it is a good idea for you, then you really need to think about what it is about the wine that works, and look for ways to get the same reaction from something else. You might find that slowly savouring a square of a really high quality chocolate might work just as well, or making yourself a hot cocoa, or various teas (as others have mentioned), or setting yourself up a fancy cheese and fruit plate as an appetizer or dessert or snack.

My current favourite relaxation trick is to spend ten minutes washing and carefully moisturizing my hands with lotion - the time under the warm water and the massage with the lotion is something that is "just for me" and always seems to "wash away" the worries of the day and let me relax in to the evening. If I'm still tense, then I'll continue to do the same for my feet --- hasn't failed so far!

Seriously, I'd recommend chatting with your doc about it and see what his / her thoughts are about it. You and your doc are the only ones who know enough about you and your health to decide whether it's an issue or a great idea.

Start weight: 240 lbs
Goal weight: 155 lbs (reached March 7, 2014)
Revised Goal weight: 150 lbs (reached May 27, 2014)

Afraid of a colonoscopy? Believe me - they are much less frightening than surgery and chemotherapy.

Colonoscopies allow polyps to be removed before they can become cancer, or let cancers be found before they are too widespread. If you are 50 or older, or have any symptoms, please don't let fear stop you from covering your butt.

Get checked!


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MOVINGFORWARD81 SparkPoints: (2,886)
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1/24/14 3:36 P

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Thank you. While I really appreciate all the replies given, yours dealt with my biggest concern. Friends and doctors have always told me that an occasional glass is fine, but occasional can be assumed to be nearly anything. Any suggestions for how often occasional might be? Once a week, maybe?




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BANDOMOM1 SparkPoints: (3,251)
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1/24/14 3:32 P

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Too much of a Good thing, can be Bad. I usually take a nice bath with Epsom salt and candle light. And drink some Tazo caffeine free teas.. I try not to take anything, that I can become dependent on..Good Luck.

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1/24/14 3:32 P

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I appreciate all of the responses. Thank you very much.

Edited by: MOVINGFORWARD81 at: 1/24/2014 (15:35)

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DIETITIANBECKY's Photo DIETITIANBECKY Posts: 26,579
1/24/14 3:11 P

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You are becoming dependent on alcohol ( a depressant) to slow your heart rate and reactions, relax your muscles, etc. Not a good choice, night after night.

You mentioned 2 forms of relaxation that you state did not work for you. There are many ways to relax the body. I guess I would first investigate "what" is keeping you stressed???
I also encourage working with a counselor/therapist on all this. This trained person can also help with techniques to use.

Becky
Your SP Registered Dietitian

NIRERIN Posts: 11,856
1/24/14 2:22 P

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try cutting back to a glass of wine instead of 6-8 oz. if you find drinks soothing you may want to try tea as it lacks calories and isn't alcohol. there is a point where having a glass of any type of alcohol on occasion isn't an issue, but it can become an issue if you're relying on it.
it's really hard to guess what you might find soothing. a scented bath? snuggling with a favorite pet? a certain perfume? listening to music? working out? try and think back to the last time you were doing something and felt really relaxed and try and duplicate that at home. if it was a nice day at the beach, get some salt spray for your hair, a rubbermaid tub big enough for your feet to fill with play sand, a heater if you live in a cold climate, a little coconut or other sunscreen smelling lotion and turn your porch or your bathroom into a beach for an hour.

-google first. ask questions later.

PHILLYMOM3's Photo PHILLYMOM3 SparkPoints: (4,909)
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1/24/14 2:19 P

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I used to do the same after a long day at work. But I found, what I needed,more than the wine, was a relaxing moment to myself.
I have three teenage boys and it's hard to find any moment.
I replaced my glass of wine with decaf french vanilla coffee. It gives my the same result.
Taking the time to just sit and sip with my thoughts (or no thoughts at all) is what I need.



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ETERNAL_STUDENT's Photo ETERNAL_STUDENT SparkPoints: (4,658)
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1/24/14 2:15 P

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The wine by itself is not an issue. What is an issue is that you are relying on something outside of your own psyche to provide relaxation.

Can you examine your day and see if you can take out more time for yourself? Are you saying yes to too many things?



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LEC358 SparkPoints: (9,251)
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1/24/14 1:57 P

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A glass of wine in of itself isn't so bad (around 100 calories/glass) but coming to depend on the wine each night in order to relax could be. Are you making time for yourself each day to be alone with your thoughts, out of a stressful environment. For me, coming home and taking the time to change out of work clothes into relaxing clothes (dress pants into sweat pants) does a big help for my state of mind before I start dealing with things that need to get done at night.



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MOVINGFORWARD81 SparkPoints: (2,886)
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1/24/14 1:42 P

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I have a very full and hectic day. I find it difficult to relax when I get the opportunity. I tried meditating and stretching routines, but after a month they still weren't helping. I usually don't drink any alcohol, but I found that having 6 - 8 ounces of wine with my dinner helps me to relax. I'm looking for opinions other than my own on how good or bad this is for my health and some ideas that are alcohol free. Help?



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