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I need help getting rid of this eating disorder.



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COWGRRRL
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1/14/14 5:14 A

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I know this is an older thread but I'm hoping that you subbed so that you'll see my reply :)

I faced EXACTLY the same situation as you not too long ago. I lost nearly 100lbs by doing a diet program and plateaued. I decided to change to calorie counting which worked for a while but after a few months I was seriously restricting my diet whilst exercising at the same time. I felt that the more calories I dropped the more weight I'd lose. I was on the fine edge of nearly having an ED and believe me there were many days where I could see over that edge and almost feel myself falling.
What pulled me back from the edge was being put into a position where I had absolutely NO idea what was going into my food, and therefore was completely unable to calorie count. I had a rough idea of what was in it (hey, when you've obsessively logged every morsel for many months it's hard not to have some idea! heh) but there was no way for me to really know.
I started to gain weight again, and whilst I went too far with comfort eating because I was missing my family who were at home while I was away for work for a long time, it helped me to stop panicking about every little morsel that I ate. I also didn't have scales, so I had no way of seeing those numbers go up or down. The only measurement system I had available to me was my clothes. If they got tighter I was eating too much, if they got looser, too little.

Any way to cut a monstrously long story short... Lol. For me the solution was to have the control taken away. I know that I have obsessive behaviours when it comes to food and I find it easier to acknowledge them and change those traits than I used to. At the moment I'm struggling again, but it's like being an alcoholic. You're never 'cured'. You just keep on working to keep an even keel. Some people find it harder than others, and if you're one of those people then therapy is a very wise and very well thought out step.
Congratulations on your healthy weight loss, but please do your best to manage your weight in a healthy manner. Those of us that have danced with the ED devil know that we often know exactly what we need to do to gain, maintain, or lose. We're experts in nutrition and our own bodies. We just tend to take that knowledge and use it in the wrong way.
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It doesn't matter how many times you fall so long as you keep getting back up.


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CALLMECARRIE
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11/6/13 9:12 A

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Almost no one who posts on Spark people claims to be qualified as an eating disorder counselor. When we see that someone has lost 100 pounds, generally we're going to be happy for them. Like Becky says, we're not qualified to diagnose the original poster with an eating disorder.

But I think we can all agree that professional help is a good idea here. My sister has an eating disorder, and as someone who has lost 100 pounds, I can testify to the ongoing mental struggle that weight loss represents. I had counseling when I was in my twenties on eating issues and it was tremendously helpful, though I still find, 25 years later, some of it never completely goes away.

"I owe everything you see here to spaghetti."

-Sophia Loren


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LEC358
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11/6/13 8:56 A

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Seriously, Bluehorse, this is something that you should seek professional help for. It's easy to say,"It's just a mental thing, I can handle it." but our brains have more power over our behavior than we like to think. I don't have experience with eating disorders specifically, but I do deal with low-level anxiety and trust me, therapy is a *huge* help. Having someone who is trained to deal with this kind of thing in your corner adds clarity and direction when you're thinking you are losing your mind. I hope you find a therapist who can help you.



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AILEBBELIA
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11/6/13 7:23 A

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I know it's been centuries since I posted, but since when do posters who think they might have an eating disorder get positive feedback for losing weight?


In the ed community all eating disorders are regarded as equally debilitating. You wouldn't congratulated a person with anorexia for losing weight. So why would you comment on a person's weight loss if they think they have BED? It's not the fact that she didn't lose through unhealthy means that's disturbing, but it's the mental fear/doubt about gaining it back that's troubling.

Positive comments about her weight might be a major trigger for her? The ed mind is very complex-(some textbooks and professionals might even say irrational -at times) what sounds rational to you as a positive comment gets twisted in our minds---I guess that's why they call it a mental disorder?













Edited by: AILEBBELIA at: 11/6/2013 (07:28)
I have faced it. Having tasted, a life wasted. Oh, I erased it, I'm NEVER going back again- E. Vedder

1/20/10 Weight Restored from 90-109 pounds.



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SLIMMERKIWI
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11/6/13 12:03 A



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Altho' I have never had eating issues, I have had other issues for which I needed the help of regular Therapy from a Psychologist. I hope that you CAN overcome this problem, but please don't be afraid to seek the help of someone qualified, because they can give you the tools to deal with these problems, and these tools can stand you in real good stead for the rest of your life.

You have learned what you had to do to lose the weight, and now the challenge is coming into the maintenance stage. A lot of people fear this - it is the land of the unknown, in a way. For me, it was very easy to overcome because I always kept a spreadsheet with my daily calories consumed. Because of this I was able to average the calories out on a regular basis and found where my maintenance level is, where I gain, and where it lose. It has really easy for me to do this because I have an obsessional personality trait (not OCD). It has also been invaluable to me - I have been maintaining for nearly 3 years.

Good luck,
Kris

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I am not a Dr - please check with your qualified Health Professional for a diagnosis and treatment plan


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BLUEHORSE17
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11/5/13 11:20 P

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I appreciate the replies that I have received from you two Unfortunately my problem is not forgetting to eat, or anything like that. My problem is that I continue to think over and over that if I eat more I will gain all of my weight back. Silly huh? The sad thing is that I know it's not true because I will never go back to the old eating habits like before. I know it's all a mental mountain that I have to try and rise up against. I have had some people recommend a therapist, but I would like to try and do so on my own. The reason for posting in this forum was mainly to obtain some tips (such as the ones I have been given by you two) as well as feedback from anyone else who might be going through (or have gone through) something similar. And I am 5'4".

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."


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SLIMMERKIWI
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11/5/13 8:57 P



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Hi - you have done remarkably well with your weight-loss. That is fantastic :-)

I agree with Becky's comment. You really ARE best off to speak directly with someone qualified who can help you and your College Campus Health Centre is a great first port of call.

Apart from Becky's advice re meals, I always think it pays to carry a little bag of nuts and/or dried fruits so that you have something healthy to nibble on if you feel peckish. I always have a very high fibre bar in my handbag for these emergencies and it works really well. I also often have some sliced apple as well to nibble as a snack or as part of my meal.

Kris



Co-Moderator Dealing with Depression
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ndividual.asp?gid=953


Team Leader Essential Tremors :-) (Benign and Familial) www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/groups_i
ndividual.asp?gid=30225


Co-Leader Crohn's Can't Stop Me
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ndividual.asp?gid=17464


I am not a Dr - please check with your qualified Health Professional for a diagnosis and treatment plan


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DIETITIANBECKY
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11/5/13 8:01 P

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You have gone from 254# to 116#. WOW! What a great accomplishment.
How tall are you? Is 110# appropriate. Perhaps focusing on the toning would be the best option for you right now. Is there a fitness center at your college where you can work out and use some of the weight machines?

It would not be medically appropriate for this site to provide a diagnosis (such as an eating disorder) via an internet site. And, reading a college text book is not the most reliable way to get a diagnosis either. Almost everyone who has lost over 100# (as you have) has been very much focused on foods consumed, portion sizes, weighing, measuring, eating in front of others, etc.

I would first direct you to the health center at your college campus. They usually have counseling on staff to help determine if there is a concern, and the appropriate course of treatment.

While I agree with you that eating breakfast and then not eating again until evening, is not the healthiest of habits....I assume it has a great deal to do with your college schedule and work schedule. Perhaps begin by coming up with 3-5 meal ideas for lunch/early afternoon. Can you pack:
a peanut butter sandwich/carrot sticks/apple
can you carry a lunch bag with an ice pack for a turkey sandwich, piece of fruit and raw veggies
or a carton of yogurt with fruit and granola
or a salad with dressing, cheese and crackers

Becky
Your SP Registered Dietitian

Edited by: DIETITIANBECKY at: 11/6/2013 (20:37)


BLUEHORSE17
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11/5/13 5:41 P

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Hi everyone. I have been trying to lose weight on my own through healthy eating and exercise for the past year and a half. As I am nearing my weight goal I have noticed that I have messed up my body. For three of the months I tried losing weight I was only eating around 1,000 calories plus I was exercising. When I exercise I stretch in the morning for 10 minutes, bike ride or swim for an hour, and lift weights for a half hour. I do this same routine every day.

Well, I ended up going into the hospital one day to see a Dietician because I felt as though I was going to faint. The 1,000-calorie-a-day thing was catching up to me. After I saw the Dietician, she encouraged me to try to consume more calories. Slowly over the past two weeks I have increased my food intake to 1,500 calories and now 1,800 calories. So to sum that story up, I have currently been on 1,800 calories the past week and a half or so.

I am currently taking a Nutrition class in college, and last week the chapter we reviewed was all about eating disorders. First off, it mentioned that people who have been obese most of their lives (such as myself); when they end up losing weight they have both mental and physical issues with trying to maintain it. For example, if they eat less they believe they will lose weight faster, and keep picturing themselves as their previous selves. That has been the same case for me. Also, most of the time I have been getting my calorie intake in for the day, but I end up just eating half a cup of oatmeal for breakfast and then I don't eat again until around 6 or 7pm at night. When I do eat again I end up consuming the rest of my calories for the day all in one sitting. I grew used to it, even though I know it's bad, because I like the feeling of being full right before I go to bed because it helps me sleep better.

What I described above is considered a binging disorder, and I also have acquired some other hints at disorders as well. I'll hide my food from my parents or eat whenever they aren't around sometimes because I tend to count my food down to the ounce and gram. This does sound obsessive, I know. As far as the foods I eat - I mostly stick with lean meats and veggies. I cook almost everything I eat at home and don't eat fast food anymore. And as far as liquids I just drink water, unsweetened tea, or black coffee.

Any advice and help would be appreciated. My goal is to drop down to 110 lbs as well as build some nice lean muscle. First, however, I need to figure out how to plan out my meals throughout the day instead of all at once without having a mental breakdown and worrying.

Edits: I have also noticed that one day I will have a lot of energy and the next day I will feel completely drained. This has been an 'every-other-day' pattern.

Edited by: BLUEHORSE17 at: 11/5/2013 (17:46)
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."


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