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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
7/24/16 3:08 P

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The journey and journal have ended. She went to Heaven on Monday, July 8, 2016 a little after 8 am. Mom: I love you until the end of time.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
7/7/16 7:41 A

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is no news good news?

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
7/6/16 11:48 A

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sometimes I think that I avoid talking to anyone up in MI because I don't want to deal with the drama

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
7/4/16 11:23 A

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Haven't talked to her but I did tell Shannon to tell her about Helena saying "Whoopie Whoopie Whoopie..." every time she has a messy diaper.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/30/16 11:22 A

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I still have guilty feelings and wish I could spend more time with her.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/28/16 11:42 A

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I talked to Sharon this morning while I was walking. She said Mom's meds have been adjusted. Mom has good and bad days but she does seem to be doing better as she's getting into a routine.

Shannon's getting frustrated and burnt out taking care of her in the morning. No one but Sharon and Harry seem to understand that I did it for 2.5 years (and by it I mean everything) and never got paid. At least Shannon's getting paid.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/26/16 2:28 P

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With Sharon's help, Mom sent Helena a birthday card that she signed herself. Her writing to me has improved. She sounded sad when we hung up the phone the other day and it makes me feel bad.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/24/16 1:18 P

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I talked to her today. She sounds good. She laughed at what I told her about Helena. She said that Helena run Barb ragged the last time we were up there. Good!

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/18/16 6:52 A

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It still amazes me that family isn't pitching in more. It amazes me that 3 years ago in June Mom was okay. July started the downhill slide that went too fast. I am glad that I got the chance to talk to mom a lot the first few months. I need to talk to Sharon about the funeral arrangements that have been made. Mom wanted to be laid out in state at St. Angela. That includes cost for embalming and a casket. St. Angela closed. Most of her friends are gone. I wonder where a service would be and if we should just go ahead and have her cremated. Can the papers be changed?

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/17/16 1:16 P

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not hearing anything and it doesn't bother me. I don't miss the bickering and name calling that two people do

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/14/16 3:30 P

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Speak of the devil...Harry called complaining that Shannon was complaining. Shannon gets paid for the things I used to do.

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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/11/16 4:40 P

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I still am amazed that I went from getting calls all the time to nothing unless it's drastic. Does this mean that they realize they can do things?

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/9/16 10:27 A

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No news is good?

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/7/16 11:40 A

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Thank God that Shannon is still going in the morning and that Sharon is there in the summer.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/5/16 12:37 P

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Sometimes I really want to be up there with Mom to keep her company. But I always don't want the grief and drama that's up there.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/3/16 8:34 A

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I really thought that Mom seemed more alert. Sharon says she's not really doing better.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
6/1/16 11:04 A

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We did go and we were all exhausted. Mom seemed to be doing better.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/27/16 9:26 A

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We are not going. But I know we will have to soon because of the condo.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/23/16 10:27 A

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Sherry is still intent on going up this weekend so I know Mom will be happy.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/19/16 11:57 A

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I did talk to Mom. First she thought I was Sharon then Shannon then she knew who I was. She asked when I was coming up. I would love to be there more...

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/15/16 1:35 P

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I will try to call today

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/15/16 1:35 P

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I will try to call today

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/12/16 3:46 P

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I wish I was there more to do more things with her in the afternoons.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/9/16 11:53 A

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still haven't called.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/8/16 8:05 P

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busy day - I feel bad that I didn't even call

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/7/16 1:52 P

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Sharon will take the time to see what's going on during the afternoon and take Mom down to it. Mom enjoys it. This is where I wish I was up there more because I could do it. Heaven knows Barb won't.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/4/16 3:23 P

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Sandy did try to get me to see Mom more. I can't. There's Helena and Sherry and Sarah.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
5/2/16 2:43 P

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She looked good and seemed more on top of things. We couldn't find her forks but...

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/22/16 12:30 P

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She's picked up about 15 pounds.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/20/16 10:10 A

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How am I going to keep Helena busy over there?

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/19/16 12:25 P

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sherry's been telling helena that we are going to see grandma bunner. Helena has been watching videos of the two of them. I can't wait.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/15/16 4:29 P

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no update - busy day

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/14/16 11:00 A

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gotta get an update

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/13/16 11:03 A

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Sherry really wants to see her and I am afraid that she will be so disappointed.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/10/16 2:40 P

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I really wish Mom could remember more. She'd probably be able to help Sherry.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/7/16 11:30 A

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The stool softener worked in the middle of the night. The water pills worked very well the next night. Shannon found her on the floor with her pillow and blanket. I feel so bad that I am not up there but Sherry and Helena need me more right now.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
4/4/16 1:34 P

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Mom's legs are really swollen and the doctor drew blood to see if it's heart related (?). I can't help but wonder....
I guess she had a really bad day where she was confused and she's usually only like that when something's not right.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/31/16 11:20 A

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Watching Mom go through this is depressing.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/30/16 9:14 P

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I just still keep thinking about how I just want to talk to her like I used to. It hurts that I can't

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/29/16 10:20 A

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I heard that Sarah skyped with Mom before we did. Sarah said that she was definitely talking off-color to her. I am concerned.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/28/16 9:59 P

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She went to Sandy's yesterday with the rest of the gang. They skyped with Sarah then with us. What commotion! Mom was talking off-color to Sarah and talking to Helena like she was still a baby. She looked so old to me and I know it hasn't been that long since I've seen her.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/26/16 3:07 P

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it'd be nice to see her.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/24/16 10:33 A

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i asked Harry if he would take Diamond and he passed on that. So I try again. I hate to have to give her to someone else but it's best. Mom hasn't asked about her in awhile.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/22/16 11:38 A

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I talked to Harry yesterday. He said that Mom is getting more comfortable with her surroundings and that she is in more of a routine.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/20/16 1:32 P

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We talked to Sandy this morning. She said that she let Mom listen to the recordings of Helena. Mom kept playing them over and over. I am so glad.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/18/16 1:21 P

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I haven't talked to her. But I know she heard the recording of Helena saying "Grandma Bunner". It's sad but I'm not sure she knows who it was saying it.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/14/16 5:07 P

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Still wishing I could talk with her and tell her what's going on. She couldn't change anything but she'd listen.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/13/16 8:59 P

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There are still times when I wish I could call her and pour my heart out. But I know I can't - she wouldn't understand.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/11/16 11:36 A

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Shannon said that she started going over at night to make sure Mom got pajamas on. She walked in on Mom and Bill.

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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/9/16 1:15 P

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Sharon is back from Florida for a few weeks. She took Mom to get a mani-pedi. Mom said it was the best day. When they got back, she found a fake flower that she had put in her pants at the salon.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/8/16 11:11 A

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I did talk to Shannon yesterday and again this morning. She said that when she got there this morning that Mom was up with her bed made and her lipstick on waiting for someone to come over. I'm guessing that she slept good last night because she got something and was waiting for Prince Charming.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/7/16 1:25 P

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tried again

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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/4/16 10:10 A

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Got a letter from Jimmy yesterday. He's been having health issues himself. He said that the last time he talked to Mom that it was a very strange conversation.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/2/16 12:45 P

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discouraged

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
3/1/16 2:40 P

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still nothing to report. at least everyone has quit calling and complaining.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
2/29/16 10:29 A

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???

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
2/28/16 8:20 P

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I feel out of the loop.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
2/26/16 10:16 A

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I talked to
Sharon for awhile yesterday. Both of us know what it's going to be like when we go back up. Neither one wants to think about it or admit it. I feel bad for Mom - she never wanted to be this way. And the sad thing about it is the fact that Barb started it all. Then she went down the line with the rest of us - starting with me - and so many of us have gotten to the point where we just don't care about her anymore. I won't back down; others are totally avoiding her. Dad never wanted it this way.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
2/25/16 10:45 A

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Mom's cousin Rich wrote a letter back to me. He said he had worried that he hadn't talked to her in awhile but said he finally talked to her a couple weeks ago. He said she sounded good but didn't say a usual joke to him.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
2/24/16 10:56 A

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It was good to get the credit card statement and have nothing on it.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
2/23/16 10:49 A

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tried again to reach her....I want to go up and check on her soon.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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PATTYKLAVER's Photo PATTYKLAVER Posts: 137,703
2/22/16 1:07 P

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She's definitely hard to reach.

God grant me the serenity to change the things I can, to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.


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