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Posts: 153
12/3/09 1:05 A

I think I may have seasonal depression on top of everything else. I had such a horrible day today. No energy. No drive. I could have cried at the snap of a finger for no reason at all. I don't feel as though I am depressed about anything in particular. It did not help that it was raining all day either. I go to see my counselor on the 8th. But he can't even prescribe meds. So no matter what I do, I am screwed. So I guess I will just have to deal with it. Until tomorrow...

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SparkPoints: (9,159)
Fitness Minutes: (5,344)
Posts: 820
11/30/09 8:53 P

My sister was always big and she grew up thinking she was worthless because she was heavy. It almost crippled her life. Finally, she made up her mind (easy to say; hard to do) that no matter what her appearance, she was valuable, unique and worthy. Moving away from negativity is hard but so worth it! As someone else said, "Love yourself!" You are beautiful and worthy. Plus, there is no one else on earth like you.

current weight: 165.0

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Posts: 11
11/30/09 7:53 P

Stay positive..you got this!

Posts: 1,342
11/30/09 4:43 P

Hey Taryn,

Do not let your fiance sabotage your momentum. Hold him accountable for his support! You can do this!
Allie

current weight: 205.0

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Posts: 153
11/30/09 12:59 A

Well I have a rough couple of days. My fiance has been quite a jerk. He absolutely would not wake up so I could go walking the last two mornings. So I just got done making a schedule of what I am going to do each day and what time to what time I am doing it in. I got the calendar off my Windows program and plugged everything in from walking, to meals, to family time, to schoolwork, to when I go to bed. I not only do this so he can see this is my time, but so I am more organized as well. I even accounted for appointments throughout my day. So hopefully this will work. I have it posted right on my refrigerator so I will see it every day...and so will he.

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Posts: 153
11/27/09 10:46 A

Thank you. I know this is a day late, but I hope you and yours did as well. I got up and went alkingthis morning, and I feel pretty good so far. At least until I have to do 3 days' worth of dishes, as I was sick for three days. Hope all is going well with you and your weight loss journey.

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Posts: 67
11/26/09 6:44 P

Just wanted to stop by and wish you a Happy Thanksgiving. I hope that all is well with you and yours.

current weight: 250.0

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Posts: 67
11/25/09 1:49 P

I know what you mean about being brought down all of the time, my family has done the same thing with me over the years. I finally had to tell them that if they could not say anything good about me to me or my daughter, then dont say anything at all. They have actually done that, but getting it out of my head was the hardest thing to do. I just woke up one day and said you know what, I raised a beautiful daughter, I am a caring and loving person, I am not all of those things that my family says I am, so now I am living for me. I am a happier person, I do however fight depression, but that is from being lonely. I hate being by myself.

Thank God you have a wonderful fiance that reminds you everyday how beautiful you are. Now do as I did and say the hell with how they feel, it is all about you now. I am here if you need to talk. Good luck with everything.

current weight: 250.0

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Posts: 153
11/25/09 1:39 P

I have a very poor self-esteem. With my father always downing everything I do and past relationships, I think very poorly of myself. My fiance calls me beautiful at least once every day. I know my self perceptions are incorrect, but it is hard to change this. I am in counseling, but for anger management issues. Maybe I need to start discussing this issue as well.

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Posts: 67
11/24/09 9:23 P

I have to say that loosing weight is the hardest thing that I have ever done in my life. Even raising my daughter was easier than this. I dont weigh myself but once a week and that is on Friday night, I use to fear the scale, but now I say to myself that I am going to loose at least one pound this week, that way if I loose more I am very happy. Plus if I dont loose anything I am not disappointed. Just try and stay positive and it will happen. Also as it has been said before you have to LOVE YOURSELF. That was something that was really hard for me to do, but I have learned to do it and now it is all about me. Good luck with your journey and if you ever need to vent I am here to listen.

WE WILL ALL MAKE OUR GOALS.

current weight: 250.0

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Posts: 17
11/23/09 8:34 P

I totally hear you girl... Here's my two cents...
1. Don't let fear control you. If you let fear into your life it will over take everything, not worth it. Don't even let your mind go there.
2. Everyone fluctuates. I know they say not to weigh yourself everyday, but you know...i do, I don't pay attention to when i "gain" 7 lb's in one day (not possible, just fluctuation) but only count the lowest number i ever see and i track that. I would go nuts if i went all week without weighing myself and then at the end of the week the weigh scale showed i stayed the same or worse gained weight... after all that hard work.
3. How much are you eating and how much are you working out. What i recently found out is you have to eat to loose weight. Sometimes we want something so bad we cut too many calories and work out a lot to get results and all it does is slow down our metabolism, put our body into starvation mode and STOP the weight loss.
4. Weight loss takes TIME!!!! It takes people years to loose weight and a lifetime to keep it off. But it's so worth it and your never missing out, on the contrary you gain so much.
5. As far as your fiancé... He does love you for you, but YOU ALSO HAVE TO LOVE YOU!!! Your gonna get there, it's about thinking positive and continuing to do what's right. Don't get frustrated research and try new things. What's the worst that can happen, you stay the same? (you won't gain weigh by working out and eating healthy)

I'm not sure if i wrote that for you or for myself. :) Good Luck!

current weight: 142.0

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Posts: 43
11/21/09 6:47 P

I think the B12 deficiency is what's holding you back. From what I know, B12 is supposed to aid in maintaining a healthy weight.

I take a B100 complex daily and I'd like to think that it's starting to help me out now.

current weight: 385.0

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Posts: 21
11/20/09 12:56 A

I'm coming off of med/steroid myself and as the same question. First I drop five then pick them right back up as if it never happend.

But I say that to say hang in there your body is surely to catch up with your mind soon.

current weight: 161.0

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Posts: 153
11/20/09 12:41 A

Here it is, another day of fear ahead of me. What exactly do I fear? I fear not being able to lose weight. I fear my fiance leaving me for someone thinner, even though he says that he loves me the way I currently am (minus the hellish mood swings). I fear not doing well in school. I went from never having anything but A's and B's, to barely being able to get C's this term. I fear failing...failing everything I set out to do.

I work out everyday, plus usually try to walk at least an hour every day. My weight and measurements continue to go up and down. I don't know what I am doing wrong. I track my calories...usually I am under though. I track my fitness. I drink my water. I try to stay positive, but it is so hard when I continue to see everything still fluctuating. Today is my weigh in day and I am not looking forward to it at all. I am so scared what those scales are going to tell me.

So why can't I lose weight? I just had a physical. Other than a B12 deficiency, I am in good health. My thyroid is still holding steady to where I don't need to start back on my medicine. I thought maybe this was the problem, but it's not. My numbers are still looking good. I lost 5 pounds last week. I'll be lucky to get on those scales later and to not have gained it all back. And I don't know why.

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