Jill, you sound just like me (except a year ago, I was getting ready for my daughter's wedding and my 25th anniversary!). Since I started trying to lose weight 44 months ago, there are only FIVE months where I have lost more than 3 pounds. Generally it's a whopping 1 pound. I've increased my exercise and kept my calories in the appropriate ranges, and still, nothing. I started at 184 and it's taken me 44 months to lose 35 pounds -- and still have 15+ to go.
In addition to needing HRT for surgical menopause (a complication you don't have, though BC can cause similar issues), I have hypothyroidism. I had to fuss and fuss to get them to treat me. The accepted range for normal TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) was .5-5 until 2003, when it was changed to .3-3. Note that the low number means hyperthyroid and the high number means hypothyroid. I was falling at 4.8 -- right in that zone between the old and new ranges. Once I got one to start treating me (I had a team of 6 doctors), the weight loss went from a weight gain (despite cutting calories and starting an exercise program) to a nominal weight loss. Each of those 5 months that I've lost more than 3 pounds corresponds with an increased dosage because my thyroid numbers were out of whack.
Doctors are all different. Some doctors (doesn't matter if they are primary care or endocrinologists) will treat on symptoms of low thyroid and a borderline lab test, others won't treat until it exceeds the limit, still others won't treat until it gets to 10. You'll need to work with your doctor(s) on that, but it's worth knowing that the definition changed a decade ago and many doctors and labs are still using the pre-2003 definition. It's a long-shot, but something to check on, since you said you have an enlarged thyroid.
I also did the 600 calorie, medically supervised diet. After just about guaranteeing that I would lose 10 pounds in a month, I lost 3 pounds in 6 weeks. The doctors were shocked. I don't recommend that diet ever, but especially not if you are planning a wedding! It was AWFUL to do because you can't eat very much at all, but it helped make my case that perhaps my diet isn't the problem. They then tested my RMR and found that I only need 1010 calories per day -- the same as the average 127 year old who weighs 10 pounds less than I do (the calculator won't go over 127 years!).
And as far trying on dresses...don't worry if you're a few sizes different than the sample sizes. When I went with my daughter, there were lots of sizes, and if it didn't fit, they have ways of fastening it with clips and cords to hold it up to see what it looks like. And if you lose the weight between now and the wedding, the seamstresses can take it in. You're clearly not the largest bride they've seen, nor will you be the first to change weight dramatically between ordering the dress and being fitted should you be able to shake this plateau.
As far as being angry about not making progress: I'm right there with you. For me, first it was to lose weight for my daughter's college graduation, then her wedding/my 25th anniversary/my 50th birthday, then my son's college graduation. I've whiffed on them ALL. And while I didn't look like I wanted to, everything still worked out just fine.
In the last year, I've lost 7 pounds despite learning to swim, buying a bike, and competing in a triathlon (my second will be in 6 weeks). With 3 hours of strength and core training a week, 2-3 hours of swimming (4000-6000 yards), 1-2 hours of running, and 5 hours of cycling (50+ miles) PER WEEK, one would think I would lose slightly more than 7 pounds in a YEAR, and more than 2 in the last 6 months. My BMI puts me at the line between healthy and overweight, but my body fat keeps me squarely in "overfat." My diet? RMR + 90% of calories exercised (using HRMs and swim watches to accurately track) to create a deficit. 1400 calories per day and expending 400 calories per day JUST TO MAINTAIN? Yeah..."angry" is one way to describe it!
It is SO frustrating when you're doing everything right but not seeing results -- not weight, not inches, not body fat, or not even the way clothes fit. Particularly when you read on message boards when people have lost 10 pounds a month for the last 6 months and now are losing "only" a pound a week. I'd be THRILLED to lose a pound a week!
The good news is that you will find a gorgeous dress that flatters your figure. There's a dress for you, I promise. I found a gorgeous MOB dress that disguised my belly and upper arms. I looked so good, even both of my brothers gasped and told me I was gorgeous! (That NEVER happens!)
Looking back after 25 years, these are things I wish I'd have known:
- While I thought I was fat then, I really was slim and beautiful. I see this now in hindsight; I wish I would have listened to and believed my guests when they told me that.
- What was fashionable then is NOT now. My daughter actually laughed at my dress!
- The pictures I cherish most are of the people who are no longer with us. We didn't take enough of them. There were plenty of me and my husband, and we're wearing the same dated fashions in every last one of them with the same deliriously happy smile in all of them.
- The day went by SO FAST. It didn't matter what I -- or anyone else -- wore. None of the details of the cake, flowers, decor, favors, etc., matter much. Some people didn't even notice them! What matters is that you are starting your life with your husband and merging two families.
I hope this helps. Yes, you have a right to be angry that you're working so hard for seemingly no gain. But don't lose sight of the prize (your fiance and your health, not the dress!). There might still be some medical things to try to lose weight a little more quickly. And you'll find a GORGEOUS dress. :)
| Pounds lost: 32.0