First of all, welcome back to SparkPeople
It took a lot of courage to come back and I'm so proud of you! You really had to swallow your pride to do it and it took even more courage to admit it on the message boards! Good for you, Hon!
Oh Sweetie, I do understand, really I do! Try not to be so down on yourself! It really does you no good at all! The past is in the past where you should leave it! Move forward from here!
I, too, lost a lot of weight on Spark, 56 lbs from 2012-2013. I hit my goal weight @Nov 20013, and then I disappeared. I left Spark and commensed to gain back 21 lbs in 10 months. Yes, I agree, it's so easy to gain! .I "woke up" last month, and came back Jun 25, 2014, just 3 weeks ago! I've been working really hard since then, walking a bit and trying to keep calories to @1200 a day, except for maybe 3 days of messing up and going way above my max calorie range. I've only lost 1 lb and was really discouraged.a few days ago.I almost quit. But I didn't! Yay me!
Anyway, unlike you, I've actually been very happy for coming back and my self-esteem is soaring! I'm so proud of myself! I'm so sorry you're feeling bad about it! I guess it's just a matter of perspective. Be kind to yourself and accept you're not perfect. We all make mistakes! Forgive yourself and be happy you have made it back! Recognize, and congratulate yourself that you didn't gain it all back before you "woke up"! Yay for you!
Celebrate, Hon, and be happy and move forward from this day forward, doing your best. That's all that really counts!
Edited by: WAY2GOCAT at: 7/13/2014 (08:05)
"Stand still and consider the wondrous works of GOD." Job 37:14
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