I am going to disagree with the posters. If the person were actually taking steps to change, then I'd say keep at it. As it stands, it sounds like you are making all the effort for them without them doing much of anything. If it is impacting your relationship, if you start to feel bad or guilty because of the lack of success and their lack of effort, it is time to let it go.
The biggest thing is, people have to WANT to change. Until they are willing to put forth some effort, until they are willing to try, even if it is just a little bit, they will never change.
In my counselling office, we talk about 'emotional vampires'. Those are people who beg for help, ask for help, praise your assistance.... But do absolutely NOTHING to help themselves. They are the people who expect something to make them change, but are not willing to make the change happen for themselves. This is draining on the person who wants to assist, and can sometimes cause the helper to feel depressed or anxious. It has destroyed many relationships.
So, think about it. You can keep trying- There is nothing wrong with that. But if they aren't changing... It isn't you. It's them. You can't force them to change unless they are willing to do it for themselves.
Best of luck.
There are no elevators in the house of success.
H. H. Vreeland
You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it- Margaret Thatcher
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