Thanks for the warm welcome. I have already read a bunch of articles here about emotional eating, binge eating, and eating for reasons other than hunger. Let's me know that i am not alone in my unhealthy relationship with food. The articles have also given me some good ideas on how to handle certain situations when they arise in a more healthy manner.
current weight: 203.2
Fitness Minutes: (8,304)
8/12/14 12:36 P
I grew up in a healthy household. I just like eating. I actually FEARED losing that when I started this journey. I was the guy who amazed friends and family by my eating prowess. I was the guy who won the pancake eating contest at the Cub Scout pancake dinner. It was almost a part of my identity. A bag of chips was a light snack.
I'm guessing you've already found some of this to be true for you too. My food 'experience' is now better, more tasty, and more satisfying than ever before.
I find I add more flavors to meals. Peppers, onions, spices, vegetables. I change preparations. Grill things like vegetables to make them more interesting. I spend a little more time thinking about my brown bag lunch. Instead of 2 plain ham sandwiches with American cheese, it's one sandwich that's loaded with peppers, spinach, onions, etc. It's about 5" tall, instead of two measly little scrawny things. And has about a million more flavors.
Tastier. More satisfying. I didn't have to give up my foodiness. In fact, I find that I can actually eat MORE total volume of food.....as long as it's the right food.
current weight: 187.2
Fitness Minutes: (5)
8/12/14 10:46 A
Hello to all and like you a good addict and hating every moment of it.....the more I stress about not wanting to eat, the more I eat.....to the point I will not look at myself without disgust any longer.
Thank you for all,
Nothing beats a failure but a try and then who is to say you failed at least you tried.
You've come to a place where you can find great support for food addiction and emotional eating. There are several good groups (I belong to lots of them and lead one). You're not alone and you've taken a powerful first step. You deserve all of the positive changes you're choosing to make in your life and I wish you well! If you need any encouragement feel free to reach out!
I grew up in a household with two obese parents. Needless to say I wasn't raised in an environment that stressed healthy eating and exercise. Food was always a significant part of my life. Luckily in my youth I was hyperactive and very into cycling, swimming, hiking, snowboarding, mountain biking, and rock climbing. I had terrible eating habits but an active lifestyle and a youthful metabolism kept me thin-too thin in fact. In high school I had some people tell me that I needed to put on some weight. Boy did I take that to heart, and then some. After college I settled into a desk job and a sedentary lifestyle. The pounds started to add up. I remember having to take a physical for a job back when I was 26. I weighed 180 back then and the doctor told me that I might want to consider losing 10 or 15 pounds. Oh boy, if only I had just listened back then. By 2005 at the age of 34 I was nearly 230 pounds. I had never put any effort into losing weight. I was kind of in denial. I decided to do Slim Fast and start walking at least a mile a day. I managed to do this for several months and get back down to close to 200lbs before falling on the wagon and putting all the weight back on and then some. By 2011 I was back to 226 lbs and 40 years of age. I started a deep descent into a dark depression and self loathing. I was really starting to feel the effects of being a fat slob for years. I was so pathetic and out of shape that I got winded tying my shoes! I snored, tossed and turned, and gasped for air so badly at night that my wife kicked me out of bed because I stubbornly refused to see a doctor about my sleep problems. I had a physical examination and I was told that I am pre-diabetic, pre-hypertension, my good cholesterol is low and my bad cholesterol is high. He told me that he wasn't going to put me on medication right away. He wanted me to lose weight and exercise and come back in six months. Instead I gained another 25 pounds and didn't go back to the doctor.
Late last year I hit rock bottom when I could no longer ignore my weight related health issues. As a result of being obese my self esteem was non-existant. My clothes were an embarrasment-ripped, stained, frayed, ill-fitting. I spent no money on clothes because I saw myself as a fat ugly slob who did not deserve nice clothes. I was so fat and ugly that no new clothes would change that. I also really let my personal hygeine take a dive. I showered only a couple times a week and grew very long hair and a long beard-neither of which were well groomed. Finally last fall I convinced myself to spend $500 on clothes. I finally hit bottom late last year when the $500 worth of clothes I bought (size 38 waist, XL shirts) were starting to get tight only a couple of months after I bought them. My health problems also made my lifestyle even more sedentary. I was too tired and too winded to do any real activity. I had hit rock bottom and I decided I needed to change. I had tried dieting before. I watched my mother struggle unsuccessfully with her weight for her entire life. I knew that if I were to succeed I needed to do it differently this time. I started to think about the parallels between addiction and my relationship with food. A normal person can have a glass or two of wine and stop without getting drunk. A normal person can buy a bag of cookies and eat one or two and put the rest away. I will sit there and eat the whole bag! Why? Because I am a food addict. Once I recognized that fact, much like an alcoholic is never cured-they are a recovering alcoholic for the rest of their lives, I was a food addict, and for the rest of my life I would need to be on a diet! That realization hit me hard. But then I accepted the fact that I was born fat. I am not a thin person inside a fat persons body (like i thought for years). I am a fat person. I have no choice but to deal with it. So, I can watch my calories for the rest of my life, or I can spend the rest of my life dealing with the health problems and depresson.
In January 2014 I decided to try again. This time would be different because I decided to make smaller goals and focus on them. My plan was to lose 10% of my current weight and then try and maintain for a few months, then try and lose another 10%. I also gradually decreased my daily calorie intake. I started out at 2500 calories a day and I am not down to 1800.
To date I have lost 41 pound but I am only about halfway there. It is amazing how just a little weight loss can impact your health. After dropping 20 pounds my diabetes symptoms have all but disappeared. I can sleep through the night without getting up to go to the bathroom a bunch of times. My sleep is also my restful and my wife says I barely snore any more. I got a pitbull puppy and he's been my inspiration to exercise. We currently run 2 miles three times a week, and walk at least a mile on the other days and on weekends we hike. He loves it and he's my motivation. He's a dog of routine and he will complain if we don't get out and exercise. I am also planning to start lifting weights soon too.
I joined this communtiy because I want a support network to help get me the rest of the way. The first half was easy-I dropped 12 pound in the first two weeks of dieting (eating 2500 calories a week by the way). Now I have to work harder and harder and I just don't see the pounds coming off as fast. I also want to make sure I not only get to where I want, but I stay there. I am trying to change my lifestyle to a healthy, active lifestyle. I am generally feeling happier, but I still have those days where I get discouraged, and while I am 40 pounds thinner, I am still obese, and some days that really still bothers me. I feel better and my clothes are looser, but when I look in the mirror I still see a big fat guy, and that makes me impatient.
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