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Should I settle?



 
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TRYINGTOLOSE64
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8/19/13 6:56 A

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Definitely seek help from a counselor!! Your body image issues need much more help then your body.. Afterall even the flattest belly will bulge up some when the person is sitting, there is no way to avoid that unless you get beyond sickening thin and at that point you are a unhealthy thin.



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LADYCJM
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8/18/13 4:41 P

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I've read several of your posts where you talk about your mom calling you fat and questioning your food choices.

It might help to have some counseling on how to deal with your mom. It sounds like your mom has a lot of issues with weight and body image and she is pushing those issues onto you.

Recognizing and learning how to deal with those issues can help you determine if you are really where you want to be.

I love family... emoticon



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AZULVIOLETA6
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8/18/13 4:29 P

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I think that it could be helpful for you to speak with a counselor or therapist about your body image issues. It is not settling to accept your body as it is...you are already tiny and not at all overweight.

I agree that you need to work on your self esteem and perhaps find more interesting things to devote your energy to in your life.

Dances: salsa (standard/LA), casino, rueda de casino, cumbia Colombiana, bachata, mambo, cha-cha-chá, merengue, reggaetón.

Currently learning: Mexican cumbia, danzón, Cuban rumba

Dances to Learn in the future: flamenco, tango Argentino, samba, belly dancing, bhangra, ballroom rumba


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SONICB
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8/18/13 8:50 A

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I agree with previous posters that you should work on your self-esteem rather than focusing on your weight.



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ATHENA1966
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8/18/13 8:38 A

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I think you would be well served to focus on accepting yourself, whether you are 122, 130, or 110 pounds. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. You have to accept you. As I have told you before, you are a beautiful girl.

Edited by: ATHENA1966 at: 8/18/2013 (10:48)
“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.
Live the life you have imagined.”
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EOWYN2424
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8/18/13 7:16 A

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I'm 4 feet 11, and I think I'm not there yet bcoz of that huge belly when I sit!



 
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DRTOVAH
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8/17/13 9:22 P

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Would love to be at your size. I have always had a belly issue even when thin, so I understand the frustration. Perhaps working strength and posture would tone and reduce protuding?



KDRICH24
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8/17/13 8:20 P

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Do what makes you happy.

Running4me


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BRUYERE62
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8/17/13 8:18 P

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Maybe it isn't a matter of weightloss anymore. You have good measurements and a good weight. Maybe it's more focussing on fitness and building muscles now. Build your confidence along with your strength.

You are beautiful.



BIISHO
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8/17/13 7:44 P

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I think you're the only one who can know :S
I mean... you're at a healthy weight, and if you lost a few more pounds you'd still be at a healthy weight so I guess it's more about what you really want...

- Danny :)
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FENWAYGIRL18
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8/17/13 7:16 P

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We would all love something to be smaller on us, you have to love yourself... I love my curves I'd never want to be a stick, be happy that you have maintained this body weight for 3 yrs . This is probably the ideal body weight for you and you don't want to get to skinny because you have some health issues and I think it's best when someone does that they have a little bit to play with on their frame.
I know plenty that would kill to be at that weight and have those curves, right now I'm one of them. I don't think those measurements are settling....

Starting to like the new me!
Waiting for my garden to come to life!


 
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ARCHIMEDESII
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8/17/13 4:48 P



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Eowyn, I've found that people who aren't happy with their body's now, won't be happy with them later even if they lost weight.

We are our own worst critics. Flaws we see in ourselves, no one else sees. We are hyper critical of ourselves because we mistakenly assume that if we looked a certain way, we'd be happy. Well, that's the problem. All the late night infomercials and diets all say the same thing. They say if we lose the weight, we'll be happy. but that's not true. How many of us lost the weight only to become MORE critical of our bodies ?

We have to learn to love ourselves "as is". Sure, it's okay to improve ourselves, but those improvements should be realistic as well as sensible. Look at how many beautiful women keep having plastic surgery to fix what's wrong with their bodies. Nothing is wrong with their bodies.

The diet industry, the cosmetic industry, the fashion industry, perfume industry, the fitness industry and even the dentists !! All thrive because of a women's insecurity with their looks. The fact is, if women respected and loved their bodies, those industries wouldn't exist. As long as women are told their looks aren't good enough, they'll turn to those outlets for help.

We assume that if we looked like a supermodel, we'd be happy. But look at the problems Christie Brinkley has had. Good looking people have just as many issues as us regular folk. The grass is always greener on the other guy's lawn.

No one is perfect. Perfection is an illusion.





LOSE4LIFE47
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8/17/13 3:00 P

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See what your dr. says if you are unsure.

Peggy (Colorado)

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FIRYMIST35
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8/17/13 2:14 P

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I'd second the height question. Also do you have a small bone structure? These are important questions, which should modify any of our answers. If you are shorter with a small bone structure then you may be able to safely lose more weight and be healthy. I would check with my doctor if unsure.



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CAMEOSUN
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8/17/13 1:51 P

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What was your height?


~ Do what good you can, and go in peace ~



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EMPRESSAMQ
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8/17/13 10:06 A

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Honestly, I think you are the only one who can answer your question, with a little help from your doctor, of course, who can advise what is a healthy weight for you.

Beyond that, no one can know what weight is best for you except you.

It is a very personal and individual thing how we feel about our bodies and what is comfortable for us in terms of weight.



Moving in new directions.


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MLAN613
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8/17/13 9:20 A

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If memory serves, you have been this weight for awhile. And I think you body is telling you that this is it. Sound like you may need to change you're thinking. And no, it's not a matter of settling; it's a matter of accepting.





MONIEE2
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8/17/13 9:14 A

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For me, my body wouldn't know how to act on a small frame. However, please don't sell yourself short, by any means!! You must first be comfortable in your skin & then to accept that even though we all have flaws, there are too many women who would die for a figure such as yours. Don't be too hard on yourself & Thank God!!



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HSHEAJ5
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8/17/13 9:10 A

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I think you are probably a victim of mainstream media these days giving you unrealistic expectations of what your body should look like. I see that all the pictures you have uploaded have been photoshopped. Well, guess what? So have the ones you see in magazines. No one's body is perfect.

While I am not sure how tall you are, we are close to the same weight. It's a healthy weight, and one that should allow you to feel good about yourself. There are always things that you can nitpick about your body. I carry my weight in my lower half, and my thighs are bigger than I'd like. My belly is not perfectly flat and sometimes I get love handles in my jeans. You know who else probably notices this? No one.

My next goal is to up my strength training to look more toned. This might be a good, healthy way for you to work on improving your body, rather than trying to get to an unrealistic number on the scale. I bet if you do make it to that 110 pounds, you'd still be able to find something you didn't like about your body. We're hyper critical of ourselves, and it's not healthy.



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KKKAREN
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8/17/13 8:57 A

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You seem over opsed with your body based on other posts and this one. These measurements seem great to me. I don't think you should work on your body but on your self esteem!

Karen


 
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TRYINGHARD54
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8/17/13 7:53 A

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you look great.. Be happy.. :-)

I CAN DO THIS


TRYINGTOLOSE64
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8/17/13 7:34 A

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I'd love to have your measurements and be down to your weight!! I'd definitely maintain at that. everyone looks like they have a poofy stomach when they sit down.

Quit comparing yourself to others. You are NOT them, you are YOU!! If you can't accept yourself then you can't accept anyone else either.

Edited by: TRYINGTOLOSE64 at: 8/17/2013 (07:37)

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LKS2GAB2
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8/17/13 7:25 A

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No matter how thin, how curvy, how pretty, how long or short our hair is their is always going to be someone that we think looks better and that we wish we looked like. You are going to have to happy and comfortable with yourself. I would guess with those measurements, (unless you are 3.5 ft tall) you look fabulous. Embrace it and enjoy it. emoticon


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STEELER71
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8/17/13 7:10 A

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What are you thinking? Or not. I'm at goal weight and I would kill for those measurements.
Be happy with your body and get on with your life.



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SLIMMERKIWI
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8/17/13 6:56 A



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I actually wonder if part of the problem with your mindset (as you have shown in many previous posts) is that you are very curvy, but most people I know of your ethnicity are generally very slim-hipped and don't have much shape. I also wonder if when you have mentioned in the past, others saying your are fat or need to slim down, is because THEY don't recognize that your shape is perfectly normal.

Below are a couple links I would like you to look at:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_body_shape#Fe
male_shapes


www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-488236/
Trinny-Susannah-reveal-12-womens-body-
types--you.html


Kris

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GOALWTIN7
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8/17/13 6:34 A

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I have a read a few posts from you about how you are not comfortable with your body and want to be smaller. No one can convince you to be comfortable with where you are at. If being smaller is important to you and you can do it in a healthy way then I would say try to get smaller. We all have to be comfortable in our own skins.



JENJEN1004
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8/17/13 5:58 A

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My personal opinion is that women look beautiful and sexy with a little bit of belly. A flat stomach doesn't appeal to me. Aside from my personal opinion about looks, I think that you should listen to your body and if it is wanting to stay at your current weight, as long as you are healthy, I say bloom where you are planted.

emoticon

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
Albert Einstein

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Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
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you'll end up someplace else.
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JENNILACEY
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8/17/13 5:51 A

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I'd kill for those curves!

It's so easy to be hyper critical of ourselves. I think those measurements sound fab.


Take your focus off the Marshmallow.

www.leangains.com/2010/01/marshmallo
w-test.html


"Toning" is marketing muscles to women who are afraid if they pick up a barbell, they'll leave the gym looking like She-Hulk. It doesn't happen, what does happen is you get results. Lifting Barbie weights does nothing but waste time.


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DEANNA0725
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8/17/13 5:21 A

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I know a lot of people that would love that figure too! If you are comfortable and happy then I say just maintain. It is going to take much more work to keep going down in weight because you might be just where your body wants it to be. Good luck!



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SLIMMERKIWI
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8/17/13 4:50 A



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GIRL ..... I know MANY who would just about KILL for that figure!

I would be MORE than happy with it - I would be downright PROUD AS PUNCH :-)

Kris

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I am not a Dr - please check with your qualified Health Professional for a diagnosis and treatment plan


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EOWYN2424
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8/17/13 1:14 A

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I'm about 123lbs and I have measurements of 36-28-38. I still have a bit of a belly but when I stand up, I look ok, I think.

My question is : Should I be happy to maintain where I'm at. Is this the best I can do to maintain? I would love smaller hips and waist but maybe this is just my body type. Maybe my body is happy to be where I'm at? I've been maintaining this weight and measurements for more than 3 years.

So, is this a happy medium for me? I keep looking at smaller women and I really want to be smaller, but maybe this is what's maintainable & healthy for me?

What do you think?



 
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