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Does guilt serve you?



 
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BLUEBIRDSFLY
BLUEBIRDSFLY's Photo Posts: 3,627
8/17/13 10:23 A

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Guilt is something that I believe has no place in anyone's lives. And no, guilt does not motivate me in the least

Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity"
-Paulo Coelho
Alchemist







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EMPRESSAMQ
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8/17/13 10:10 A

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I think guilt is a negative inappropriate emotion to apply to matter of weight and to most of the minor things humans tend to feel guilty about.

Guilt was never even a factor in my major weight loss and now maintenance. There are more useful concepts that fuel my journey.





Moving in new directions.


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BLUENOSE63
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8/17/13 8:14 A

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Once I figured out where the guilt was coming from, I left it in the rearview mirror and never looked back.



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EOWYN2424
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8/17/13 12:44 A

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I almost never binge but I do feel some guilt when I don't exercise, but some days you just don't feel like it! Sometimes I force myself to exercise and I always feel better after I do! So, when I really don't feel like exercising, sometimes I just make myself do it, reminding myself of how good I would feel afterwards!

But sometimes, I just don't exercise! Then I start feeling guilty!



 
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MANDIETERRIER1
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8/16/13 11:05 P

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Guilt has never done me any good, as a previous poster said I go into a tail spun and lies motivation

Made it to my maintenance weight of 125 pounds.

Even though I have reached goal. I still don't know everything about weight loss.

Please read my blog

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.com/2014
/07/in-home-stretch.html


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GRAPHICS2
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8/16/13 9:24 P

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No, I go into a tailspin and lose motivation.



SHERYLDS
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8/16/13 5:48 P

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for me there are good and bad foods
I call them healthy choices versus trigger foods...
and there are the in betweens that don't affect me as drastically.

When I indulge in trigger foods, I feel I've sabotaged myself...and I find in hard to stop.
That's where the guilt helps me....
I know I willingly pushed myself off the track and only I can correct myself.
As an adult...no one can stop me from self destructing ..but myself.
I pay for my guilt by going extra healthy getting back on track.

USA EST


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AZULVIOLETA6
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8/16/13 2:45 P

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This is an interesting question.

I think that a small amount of guilt is motivating for me, personally. It's not so much about beating myself up as holding myself accountable and doing what I need to do to properly take care of myself. In my case, it has very little to do with larger social accountability--it is an intrinsic motivation.

For me, control is a more helpful concept. I gained weight in the first place because of severe health problems beyond my control. I have a lot of challenges in my life that are out of my control. But what I eat and how much I exercise--those are absolutely things that I can and should control.

Dances: salsa (standard/LA), casino, rueda de casino, cumbia Colombiana, bachata, mambo, cha-cha-chá, merengue, reggaetón.

Currently learning: Mexican cumbia, danzón, Cuban rumba

Dances to Learn in the future: flamenco, tango Argentino, samba, belly dancing, bhangra, ballroom rumba


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ICEDEMETER
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8/16/13 1:48 P

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Personally, I don't "do" guilt, and I haven't noticed that I'm on a "wagon" of any kind.

I am living my life. My life involves making choices, and this journey, for me, involves making changes in which choices I go with. Now, I more often go with choices that add to my nutrition and my overall health. Sometimes I make choices that aren't so physically healthy, but make me emotionally happier at the time. I don't consider this "blowing it" - it's just what choice I made at the time. So long as I'm making more healthier choices than not, then I figure I'm heading in the direction that I want to go.

It may work for others, but I can't see any purpose to over-analyzing any one (or even a few) decisions and feeling guilty about it.

Start weight: 240 lbs
Goal weight: 155 lbs (reached March 7, 2014)

Afraid of a colonoscopy? Believe me - they are much less frightening than surgery and chemotherapy.

Colonoscopies allow polyps to be removed before they can become cancer, or let cancers be found before they are too widespread. If you are 50 or older, or have any symptoms, please don't let fear stop you from covering your butt.

Get checked!


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BUNNYKICKS
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8/16/13 1:46 P

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Guilt is HORRIBLE. It has never done one thing to motivate me to make a positive change. In fact, the opposite, it's made me feel like "I don't even DESERVE anything better" and this kind of thinking leads straight down some very self-destructive pathways. I have quite literally punished myself with food, punishing my body with unhealthy food in unhealthy portions. More guilt. Then more loathing. Then more punishment.

Sometime in 2012, I woke up. I don't know what happened inside my head, exactly, but something shifted, and I decided I would simply have to make do with being the best "me" that I could be. Decided that if it really were my destiny to be a big woman, I would make the best of it. Instead of wearing ugly frumpy dowdy clothing (which I suppose was supposed to "motivate" me to lose weight so i could wear more stylish clothing? yeahhhh that... doesn't work), I decided to invest in some nice stylish pieces in my size at the time (22w). I ditched my glasses (frames 10 years out of style) and started wearing contacts. I got my hair done. I bothered with makeup. I decided to try to think of myself as Queen Latifah or Melissa McCarthy.. big women that exude confidence and LOOK DAMN GOOD.

I kind of figured I'd remain a big woman. A *Guilt Free* big woman.

And after about a year of really working on changing my thought process from guilt, loathing and punishment to something a bit more resembling pride and self-appreciation.... *click* "hey, I could... probably drop a few pounds, how hard would it really be? and maybe my damn knees wouldn't hurt so much and maybe i'd be able to do some of the things that my weight has really started to restrict me from doing, that i'd actually like to do again...."

Yeah. I would not be here with a 50+ pound weight loss result if i were still operating on Guilt.



Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)


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TRUEPEACENIK
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8/16/13 1:28 P

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Does guilt serve you in any way?
I read so much about people and their guilt about food, not exercising, making bad choices, whatever.
They are beating themselves up, or simply acting a social script.

I'm not seeing it change behavior or outcomes.
And I'm Jewish, so I know from guilt.

Does guilt help or hinder YOU?

Conversely, I read, "oh enjoy it and get back on the wagon tomorrow."

Does that concept help or hinder? Does it give hope of a better decision next time, or an excuse to blow it and start over?

Wake up every day knowing you make the decision to begin your journey anew.

This choice in this moment defines now.

What is your now?


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