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Invited to dinner = no say on the menu - now what?



 
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BANKER-CHUCK
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6/15/14 9:45 P

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emoticon KKKAREN and JIACOLO for the defense on older post. Some of the newer post are not old just another person asking the same question.

Chuck

1/1/10 Start Wht 279 lbs
12/1/114 Goal 190

**Maintain** "OR" set new Goal! 170's maybe??


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TENNISJIM
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6/14/14 8:00 A

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eat what you can and eat a portion controlled meal



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TLEA53
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6/14/14 7:45 A

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Make sure you are not hungry before you go and just eat a small portion to be polite.

You didn't gain it in a day, you won't lose it in a day.


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JIACOLO
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6/14/14 7:42 A

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I agree that it doesn't matter when a question was posted. It is a good question to consider.

For me, I will eat whatever is offered, but in moderation. My family loves to go out for Chinese food. I don't. Don't get me wrong, I love it. It, however, does not love me. So I make sure to get veggies and fill my plate with them. The rest I eat a small amount.

If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results.

- It's Janine!


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BIBLIOTEKARZ
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6/14/14 6:21 A

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This is probably a bigger issue for me than it would be for others-my family is essentially vegan (we're whole foods, plant based but that terminology confuses people) and we also try to avoid oil in our food as well. So we're a big ball of fun at parties, lol.
When I'm invited to a party or dinner most of my friends ask about dietary restrictions (I know I always do) especially b/c so many people have allergies these days. If your host didn't, call them up and just ask if there is anything you can bring. Also, it's not probably OK by Emily Post, but you can always explain concerns to the host if you have a special diet (and that's where offering to bring food come in.) Most people want you there more than they care about the food and will be fine. Those who get upset, well, I think they need to lighten up. If they care more about their menu than the conversation, it's their problem, not yours.



KKKAREN
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6/14/14 6:15 A

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I don't mind at all when an old post gets brought back up. Especially when the new ones we have are all so dull. In answer to the question, go out enjoy the company and their food, eat in moderation.

Karen


 
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BANKER-CHUCK
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6/13/14 7:02 P

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EELPIE started it. emoticon emoticon

Chuck

1/1/10 Start Wht 279 lbs
12/1/114 Goal 190

**Maintain** "OR" set new Goal! 170's maybe??


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RENATA144
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6/13/14 5:43 P

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Enjoy. Life is too short to streets out.

I Love to collect SPARKPOINTS !!!


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ETHELMERZ
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6/13/14 3:42 P

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I still agree with what I said last year, "eat the vegetable, and the meat, if it's a casserole, eat only one cup full, drink black coffee or plain club soda with a lemon slice. Or you can bring some cauliflower and mushrooms in a bag in your purse, if the dinner is soon, you can bring some tuna with you. Eat at home before you go, and just sit and "pick" at stuff.

Plan for tomorrow, but enjoy the heck out of today.


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EELPIE
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6/13/14 3:34 P

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I was just curious how long it took is all - and like I said, I'd planned on responding, then realized the Op was long gone, therefore would be a waste of *my* time.

You are not fat. You have fat.
You also have fingernails. You are not fingernails.


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BANKER-CHUCK
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6/13/14 3:12 P

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EELPIE, It only took me 10 seconds. As for resurrecting old subjects...what is wrong in that? It is a good subject that bears repeating. If you don't like the fact that I pull old postings then don't put down the people who think it is currently still relevant.

Chuck

1/1/10 Start Wht 279 lbs
12/1/114 Goal 190

**Maintain** "OR" set new Goal! 170's maybe??


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KRAFTYKRAFT
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6/13/14 2:18 P

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I am a vegetarian so I am quite used to arriving at a dinner or meal and finding nothing on the menu that appeals to me. I always throw some almonds, a granola bar and a box of raisins in my purse so that I won't starve. Then I try to make do with what is served - for example I eat a lot of salad or try to make something out of any veggie appetizers that are served. If someone calls me out - I simply say that I am a vegetarian and leave it at that.



ALICIA214
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6/13/14 2:14 P

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Portion control is a good rule of thumb...

emoticon



KINISUE
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6/13/14 2:03 P

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I must say that I didn't even notice the date on the first post until eelpie posted. For me I am very thankful that this was posted. I got quite a few good pointers from it even though they were old. So maybe it is a good thing that people check out questions and post to them. The advice is still good. I didn't know that you could search for a topic so that was one of the best piece of information that I learned. Love SparkPeople Cafe!!!

To keep spiritually fit, consult the Great Physician.


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EELPIE
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6/13/14 1:54 P

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emoticon

You are not fat. You have fat.
You also have fingernails. You are not fingernails.


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LIFENPROGRESS
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6/13/14 1:47 P

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When Pizza is on the menu -- I have learned a neat trick:

When you receive your slice (or two), cut the piece(s) in half longways (giving you two equal, smaller slices). Then eat it with a knife and fork. Put the fork down between EVERY bite.

You will fill up quickly.

Best of luck!

Never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be! bodynprogress.blogspot.com


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EELPIE
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6/13/14 1:34 P

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I guess...it utterly blows my mind, as it happens quite a bit, with such random topics.... emoticon

Edited by: EELPIE at: 6/13/2014 (13:35)
You are not fat. You have fat.
You also have fingernails. You are not fingernails.


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TRIPLEMWF
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6/13/14 1:30 P

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I'm going to go ahead and give Chuck the benefit of the doubt and he probably utilized the search feature looking for topics that he was interested in emoticon

You'll never regret the workout you do, only the one you don't.


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EELPIE
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6/13/14 1:09 P

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Wow - I was actually gonna respond to this - but I realized that it most likely resurrected from the dead - and the original poster no longer here....sure enough. emoticon

I couldn't imagine the time it would take to scroll through a years worth of posting here on the cafe.....

How many pages do you scroll through to find these 1 year and 2 year old postings? 100 or so? 200? 300? 400? 500?

How long does it take to do it repeatedly? An hour or so? 2 hours? 3 hours? 4 hours? Whew. emoticon

I couldn't imagine that much time on my hands. Heck, I don't like exercising much, but if I had so much free time on my hands, I'd hit the gym - at the very least. Maybe find a book I always wanted to read.... emoticon

Edited by: EELPIE at: 6/13/2014 (13:13)
You are not fat. You have fat.
You also have fingernails. You are not fingernails.


 current weight: 111.5 
 
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BANKER-CHUCK
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6/13/14 12:53 P

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I always eat my nutritional foods about 1 to 2 hours before I go out....anywhere. By doing this I will not have to eat lite during the day and can enjoy the foods when I go out. When I get to the destination I treat the foods not on my list as a snack and eat lite. Generally the main course is not the only thing being offered..

Chuck

1/1/10 Start Wht 279 lbs
12/1/114 Goal 190

**Maintain** "OR" set new Goal! 170's maybe??


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BLUENOSE63
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6/15/13 8:44 P

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NIRERIN has hit the nail on the head! The way to live life I feel it to eat in moderation while putting things into perspective.

If I want pizza, I eat it! I just don't eat more than 2 medium pizza. I am satisfied but have not gone overboard.



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AMYTHBE
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6/15/13 1:54 P

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That's a good way to think about it. Long term vs. short term. Thanks for the advice :D



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NIRERIN
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6/15/13 10:07 A

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i think it's also time to put things into perspective. if you eat 1500 cals a day that adds up to 547,500 cals a year. even a 4000 cal outback dinner starts to pale in comparison to that. but the point of looking at everything for the year is that if that outback trip is your one situation like this for the year, then you only need to save 11 cals a day to balance that out. in other words, if your ranges were 1200-1550, you'd need to eat in the range of 1200-1539 to be able to accommodate that 4000 cal meal and not gain weight.
now if you wanted to make that dinner a monthly thing rather than a yearly thing, well, there's about 30.41 days in a month. at 1500 cals a day, that means you're looking at 45,625 cals a month. to balance out a 4000 cal meal on a monthly basis, you're looking at needing to reserve 132 cals a day.
so the more often you hit these situations, the more you do need to pay attention to them. but on a one by one basis, they're not crippling to your efforts. if you encounter them frequently enough, they may slow you a little. but one meal isn't going to dictate how you do for the rest of the year and the rest of your meals.
because remember, that's the math for a 4000 cal meal. your friend is likely going to be able to provide a meal that comes in at least a little under that.
so try and stick to portion sizes when you are out. a piece or two of pizza is fine, but try and limit it to that. figure pizza tends to be in the 300 cals a slice range, and i would guess bbq chicken would add at least another 100 cals. so two pieces is 800 cals. not the lightest dinner ever made, but also not going to ruin the calorie bank for the week. figure if you're going heavier on the meal, go lighter on the drinks and again, have one or two, spacing them out with water. a heavier meal is not one that you want to have 2 600 cal daquiris with or two bottles of wine.
and if you know you're having dinner with the pizza friend, eat a little lighter that day. focus a little more on getting your fruits and vegetables in earlier [but do make sure you still get some protein and fat in as well so that you aren't priming yourself to overeat pizza by eating too little during the day] and if you do go heavy, eat a little lower in your ranges the next few days to balance it out.
and if you do want to get yourself a little more leeway, bump up your exercise a bit. don't try and link it [i'm going to dinner with pizza friend on friday so i am going to burn the 400 cals for an extra slice on the elliptical on thursday] exactly, but figure if you walk a mile twice a week that would give you an extra 200 cals to play with a week.

Edited by: NIRERIN at: 6/15/2013 (10:13)
-google first. ask questions later.



ETHELMERZ
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6/14/13 11:40 P

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Simple, eat the boring vegetables, meat, or if it's a casserole, take a cup full plus the vegetables, drink black coffee or soda water. It's not really that hard to do, the trouble is, we really want to eat the stuff that tastes so good!

Plan for tomorrow, but enjoy the heck out of today.


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JIACOLO
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6/14/13 11:29 P

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I ask ahead of time what will be served and then plan accordingly. If I had to, I will eat a little before I go, then try a little of what is offered, but don't over do it.

If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results.

- It's Janine!


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JANIEWWJD
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6/14/13 11:07 P

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When that happens, I just eat a little bit of the main dish and a lot of vegetables.

Janie Garcia Moreno

"WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE"

"PRAYER CHANGES THINGS"

"NEVER PUT A QUESTION MARK WHERE GOD HAS PUT A PERIOD!"

"WHAT THE MIND CAN CONCEIVE AND BELIEVE, IT CAN ACHIEVE!"


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SLIMTHICK2
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6/14/13 8:43 P

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I have also been invited to attend one tomorrow. I promise to have light meals during the day and stick to small portions at dinner time.



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LOUNMOUN
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6/14/13 7:28 P

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You can go and just eat sensible portions of whatever you are served.
You can eat lighter breakfast & lunch that day or the day after.
You can offer to bring something that fits your diet.
You can turn down the invitation to dinner and suggest getting together some other way with no food involved.

I would just go and eat what is served without stressing about it.



DRAGONCHILDE
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6/14/13 7:26 P



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I don't avoid certain kinds of foods, so I don't have this problem. One meal won't cause all of your hard work to be undone! Just stick to reasonable portions, and enjoy yourself!

Heather
Writer, mother, wife, and breadwinner. I love to run, but running doesn't love me, so I'm switching to my low-impact bike.

I'm not pregnant, just fat: My blog.

fatnotpregnant.blogspot.com/


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ANARIE
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6/14/13 12:34 P



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And except for the most formal of occasions, it's *never* bad manners to offer to bring something. When you get the invitation, you can always say, "Oh, great! Would you like me to bring a salad?" Either the host will say, "Yes, thanks!" and you can be assured of having something healthy, or they'll say, "No, I've got it," and realize that they should make a salad if they weren't already planning on it. A slice or two of pizza and a plateful of salad would pretty much keep you on track for the day.



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BUNNYKICKS
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6/14/13 12:24 P

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You don't always have to eat "diet" food.... when you don't, that's where Portion Control kicks in!

I totally agree with what others have suggested... go on the light side at breakfast/lunch, go on the light side the next day. And for dinner, enjoy your pizza... but don't try to match him slice for slice! Have a couple slices, make it last by nibbling and enjoying it over conversation and laughter, and then declare yourself stuffed. If you "go over" your range for the one day? It is not THAT big a deal. It's what we do MOST of the time that matters.

Someone else suggested looking at your calorie range as a "3 day average" - that's a really good idea. I often look at my nutrition tracker down at the bottom where it shows my last 7 days, and average them out. As long as the "average" number is around the middle of my calorie range, I consider the week a raving success. I'll note that even during Easter (when i had a 3000 calorie day), my "7 day average" was still under 1550....



Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)


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MATTHEW0498
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6/14/13 11:43 A

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I typically try to go with smaller portion sizes if it's something that is a little iffy.



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LADYSTARWIND
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6/14/13 11:42 A

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If you know ahead of time, consider your calories as a three day average.... The day before, the day of, and the day after.

Eat on the lower end of the calorie range those days---focusing on the foods you're not likely to get. Plan to eat a healthy snack before you go. And then --go---Enjoy !!----(and just try to keep portions somewhat in control)! emoticon

In my view, there are no foods off limit---I am trying for a balanced lifestyle over time.
patti

Edited by: LADYSTARWIND at: 6/14/2013 (11:43)
"Its not the Mountain ahead that wears you out, but the grain of sand in your shoe..."


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VCOOTS61
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6/14/13 11:38 A

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Eat lighter for lunch today and save those calories for dinner and try to get in a walk or exercise in today. Or just go light on your potion sizes for any high calorie or high fat foods. With family they know I will skip certain food items and won't be offended so you might be able to get away with that too.
Worst case, tomorrow is a new day and you can exercise and workout and hopefully balance out any extra calories you might have tonight. Enjoy your time with your friends!

Time to take care of ME!


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PEIXOTOSTUFF
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6/14/13 11:29 A

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I went out last night to a friend's house. We had a delicious barbecue chicken pizza. I knew before going that dinner would not be with my new diet foods (he is not the type that would offer quinoa or a salad). What do you do when you are invited over for dinner? Just forget about all the hard work to stay off that type of food?

"Do. Or do not. There is no try."



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