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Tact or Blunt: Which works best for you? |
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ANARIE
is the moderator for this forum.
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tack
Jenae
| current weight: 148.8 |
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I feel I can be truthful and straight forward and still say it in a way that doesnt make me look like a big jerk. I prefer honesty in people but there is a way and tone you use that effects how your words or message coms off to others.
Edited by: AMB3RKENJI at: 2/2/2013 (21:19)
White Tiger Biggest Loser Challenge 2013 spring melt off SW:224 CW: 198.0 LGW: 130-140
| current weight: 198.6 |
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tact
Blessings, BevBear LIVING A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE FOR A LIFETIME! 2013 Spring Into Summer 5% Challenge Goooooooooo TeddyBearTeam!!! California - PST
| current weight: 204.0 |
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Tact is truly what works best for me when I'm dealing with others. With that said, Blunt is what I go with if I'm in real danger or safety is about to be compromised for the other person, myself, or both of us. Also, if the other person is not keen on a tactful, polite approach over a duration of time. Just being honest.
| Total SparkPoints: 23,359 |
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a bit of both, I am trying to be more tactful, I have been very blunt in the past.
Tammy I live in Idaho, and I am ready for change.
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I BIT OF BOTH.
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I'm incredibly blunt, and it get's me in trouble sometimes. I wish I had more tact.
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit. - Aristotle
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both
Made it, this time to my goal of 72K but reset it 70k to let me go up or down. I will be very happy to stay between the two. See http://trevcannon.blogspot.co.uk/
| current weight: 1.0 over |
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I'm usually more blunt than tactful
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tact
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tact works best for me
------- Carolyn ------- ----- Ontario Canada ----
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My preference is tact. Depending on the situation though, I may get tactfully blunt. I try to not let a situation or person stop me from being the person that I would like to be
Kristin Goal Weight 5/31/13:165 actual: 6/30/13: 160 actual: "I am learning every day to allow the space between where I am and where I want to be to inspire me and not terrify me." - Tracee Ellis Ross
| current weight: 167.4 |
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Depends on person and situation
Earn your body
| 148 Days since: unhealthy eating and being a sluggard |
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tact
SPARKERS ROCK!!!!
| current weight: 151.6 |
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Push for tact, but sometimes it may come off as blunt
Shelley
| Pounds lost: 7.2 |
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People who read my message board posts probably think I am blunt
My first goal is to get back to 135lbs (just 6.8 lbs to go)
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Tact, but don't tell me anything I already know, and I won't tell you anything you already know.
Rosy
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I guess I would have to say neither. I have come to something ( like weight loss ) on my own. Blunt just bruises my feelings really hard and shuts me down. Tact either doesn't register or it effects me like a veiled insult, even if I know it is not. Fat people know they are fat, they don't need to be told that.
| current weight: 189.5 |
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I try to be tactful, but clear. There's usually a way to say something, even a direct criticism, without being hurtful. I resort to bluntness if the tactful delivery of the message is not getting my point across AND it's essential that the point get across. In my work I often have to have "difficult conversations" with people. Things go MUCH better when those messages are delivered tactfully rather than bluntly. As for that phrase "no offense", just like "I hate to tell you this, but" it means that the person is about to say something deliberately hurtful, and they're trying to mask it by claiming that they're just "being honest". You can be honest without flaying someone, and you can use the truth as a weapon.
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TACT! It's always better to be polite & think of other's than to be rude & blunt.
It Is What It Is.... :)
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Tact with the honesty of bluntness, not the connotations ;)
I am too positive to be doubtful, too optimistic to be fearful, and too determined to be defeated. No negative thoughts allowed :)
| 134 Days since: french fries |
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My vote is for tactfully blunt...or is that an oxy moron?
You NEVER regret a workout! Love Sojo
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tact
Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity" -Paulo Coelho Alchemist
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I try to be tactful, but of course everyone who hears what I say sees it as being blunt. Sometimes, I come off as not being Spark friendly.
Weight is the result of what you have been doing for the past week.
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LOL@ "No offense", hahahahaha.... When thats said to me I usually jam in there, "Too late..."
Edited by: KJFITNESSDUDE at: 1/7/2013 (14:56)
It is not okay for an alcoholic to get drunk once in a while. So do not tell a food addict it is okay to eat like sh*t once in a while
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It varies person to person, sometimes dependent on how I'm feeling at the time. I'm pretty good at gauging who can take what. In the end, I do prefer straight-forward honesty to tip-toeing around the matter.
Ridicule is nothing to be scared of.
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My daughter is like that, she's thought for years now that as long as she starts with 'no offense, but' it's drives me batty especially since she can not take any criticism back. She's married and on her own now, the sooner she learns the sooner she'll be able to be happy.
I may not be there yet but I'm closer than I was yesterday. I got tired of starting over and working back to where I was, so I have stopped giving up! Ann
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I find it fascinating that people sometimes equate tact with being fake or telling lies. I knew someone like this and if you used the same blunt honesty with her. That she found so necessary to use on everyone else. You hurt her feelings. She could dish it out but she couldn't take it.
My first goal is to get back to 135lbs (just 6.8 lbs to go)
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That's true but her cousin is just plain rude so in my opinion there's a difference of brutal honesty and rudeness (honestly being objective and rudeness being subjective). I totally get the "filter" part, after a few drinks I get amorous and flirty......filter? WHAT filter?
It is not okay for an alcoholic to get drunk once in a while. So do not tell a food addict it is okay to eat like sh*t once in a while
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BTW - some people just don't get it when you decline tactfully. Sometimes you HAVE to be brutally honest!
The most handicapped person in the world is a negative thinker; a person who has the skills, abilities, talents and tools, yet chooses not to use them. ~Heather Whitestone Forget your perfect offering There is a crack in everything That's how the light gets in. ~Leonard Cohen
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a personality test I took many years ago for a job pretty much pegged me - bashful & almost brutally honest. anybody who knows me well knows not to ask for my opinion if they don't want the truth. I really try to be tactful, but if I've had a beer, I'm tired, or just not feeling great...well that filter doesn't work as well. I did learn to ask "do you really want to know?" before answering those "what do you think" questions
The most handicapped person in the world is a negative thinker; a person who has the skills, abilities, talents and tools, yet chooses not to use them. ~Heather Whitestone Forget your perfect offering There is a crack in everything That's how the light gets in. ~Leonard Cohen
| Pounds lost: 18.0 |
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Tact.
SPARKERS ROCK!!!!
| current weight: 151.6 |
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Humor! Gets them everytime.
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Oh, the holidays is such a great opportunity to observe family members whom you may not otherwise stay in contact with during the non-holiday season, lol. And so is the case with my gf's cousin who pretty much said that people should be okay with her 'frankness' because she tells the truth. My opinion, she has no tact. To her being tactful is lying.
It is not okay for an alcoholic to get drunk once in a while. So do not tell a food addict it is okay to eat like sh*t once in a while
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I prefer when people are tactful towards me!
GOALS: 24 Sep: 142 - Achieved 28 Sep 28 Oct: 136 - Achieved 14 Oct 9 Dec: 130 - Achieved 4 Dec 30 Dec: 126 - Achieved 16 Dec 30 Jun: 120 -
| current weight: 135.8 |
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learning to be more blunt, when needed, so I don't feel frustrated for not making a clear point to those that disregard the tact....but mostly tact.
one day at a time...
| Pounds lost: 4.0 |
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tact
SPARKERS ROCK!!!!
| current weight: 151.6 |
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tact
Made it, this time to my goal of 72K but reset it 70k to let me go up or down. I will be very happy to stay between the two. See http://trevcannon.blogspot.co.uk/
| current weight: 1.0 over |
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tact
Seek peace and pursue it!
| Total SparkPoints: 43,762 |
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| SparkPoints Level 16 |
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Tact!
Ane Marie Hamilton On.Canada Est Walking takes longer than any other known form of locomotion except crawling. Thus it stretches time and prolongs life. Edward Abbey
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