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    TAISIAKAT   14,517
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TAISIAKAT's Blog Entry Summary View



Every day I remind myself it is a new day

Monday, November 17, 2014      2 comments

And I work very hard to keep myself from sinking into the molasses dragging feeling called despair and hopelessness. I remind myself - knowing what I know, seeing what I have been through - THIS WILL PASS. There will be a job for me...it w... Read more

I'm not dealing well anymore

Tuesday, November 11, 2014      5 comments

I have bad nightmares at night, and they wake me up. I am living on pins and needles watching everything we built up - disappear I feel the walls closing in around us and there is no end in sight ALL I WANT IS A DECENT PAYING JOB!!!! ... Read more

Fall - eh

Wednesday, October 29, 2014      1 comments

I had a real hard night, worked myself up into such a tizzy about these upcoming faires I am selling at. Then had nightmares about previous companies I have worked for, all turning into one jumbled mess of shame, sadness, feeling betrayed, feeli... Read more

Momentary lapse of sanity and lack of positiveness and not keeping it bottled up

Saturday, September 20, 2014      4 comments

I posted this on my facebook but I wanted to also post here. ----Move on ---- if you're not interested in venting {first} and re-thinking {breaking apart the issue}. I am not looking for cute antidotes, 'you're strong you can do it' respons... Read more

Continuing the previous post - Anxiety and self esteem

Tuesday, August 26, 2014      1 comments

Between the depression (and my PTSD), I have the more than occasional anxiety attacks. I used to be on meds for it, but they made me feel like cotton and swimming in jello. Not a very good feeling. I have a strange balance with my anxiety... Read more

Depression - living with it

Tuesday, August 12, 2014      5 comments

First, I am so sad to see such a fine, wonderful human being who lost his battle to Depression. Robin Williams will be missed. I know his movies, his comedy, his personal touch touch hundreds of thousands of individuals like myself. His most ... Read more

This week has been...interesting.

Friday, August 01, 2014      6 comments

Beginning of the week I was prepping for my colonoscopy that happened on Wednesday. This meant clear liquid diet for two days before, and soft foods for two days before that. I had to stop taking my RA meds because they are a heavy duty Ibupro... Read more

Hot, tired, pained, frustrated

Monday, July 28, 2014      2 comments

I had to stop taking my RA meds and Ibuprofen three days ago because I am going in for a Colonoscopy and can't take those until after the procedure on Wednesday. It makes walking a real PIA (literally and figuratively) I've gotten so tired of ... Read more

I cut out the wrong time sink...

Tuesday, July 15, 2014      9 comments

I cut out Sparks people because I spent more than an hour on here updating, doing points etc, but funny thing was, I was loosing weight. Cut the sparks updates out and tracking and poof, weight comes back. So back to tracking. I really wa... Read more

Quick stop

Wednesday, November 13, 2013      2 comments

Back from Colorado and the wedding. Lots of things happened, hit 290 :) Ya! Though now get back into a serious push on getting 2lbs a week so I can get to 260 by Januaryish. Lots of reasons to push harder on this. Lots of things to write up... Read more

Authentic - and whats appropriate

Wednesday, October 30, 2013      4 comments

Recently I posted on my Facebook a very deep post - a gratitude post about not taking anything or anyone for granted because you never know when something may happen. I'm working on my authentic self, and working on stopping my judging of o... Read more

For Day Ending 10/25 (Friday) - Sleep Diary

Saturday, October 26, 2013      1 comments

What time did you wake up today? 10:30 am What time are you lying down to go to sleep? 12:45 am What, if any, was your bedtime routine? - Pills, moisturize, read What were the last food(s) you consumed tonight? Dinner - chicken wi... Read more

For Day Ending 10/24 (Thur) - Sleep Diary

Friday, October 25, 2013      2 comments

What time did you wake up today? 10:00 am What time are you lying down to go to sleep? 2 am What, if any, was your bedtime routine? - Pills, moisturize, read What were the last food(s) you consumed tonight? Dinner - Leftovers but... Read more

Only 31 calories over yesterday.

Thursday, October 24, 2013      2 comments

I gave myself permission to splurge on my birthday. I wanted fresh crab newburg. YUMMY... But I was really good. 31 calories over - ate lots of cauliflower. Today, I am having my birthday desert since I went over yesterday, I saved the... Read more

For Day Ending 10/23 (Wed) - Sleep Diary

Thursday, October 24, 2013      1 comments

What time did you wake up today? 11:45 am - Slept in and boy was that nice What time are you lying down to go to sleep? 1:45 am What, if any, was your bedtime routine? - Pills, moisturize, read What were the last food(s) you cons... Read more


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