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    SUNSHINE65   67,652
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Dave Barry's colonoscopy journal

Sunday, April 10, 2011      4 comments

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point... Read more

IMPORTANT MESSAGE TO WOMEN EVERYWHERE

Saturday, April 02, 2011      10 comments

You've no doubt heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves. My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. ... Read more

So Far So Good

Saturday, April 02, 2011      3 comments

www.maniacworld.com/stay
-calm-dad.html ... Read more

How to Mess Up a Job Interview

Wednesday, March 30, 2011      3 comments

We've all been interviewed for jobs. And, we've all spent most of those interviews thinking about what not to do. Don't bite your nails. Don't fidget. Don't interrupt. Don't belch. If we did any of the don'ts, we knew we'd disqualify ourselves i... Read more

The Bible According to Kids

Monday, March 28, 2011      10 comments

The following statements about the Bible were written by children and have not been retouched or corrected (i.e., bad spelling has been left in.) - In the first book of the Bible, Guinesses, God got tired of creating the world, so he took ... Read more

Ponderings for Idle Moments

Sunday, March 27, 2011      2 comments

- Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it? - Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak? - How come abbreviated is such a long word? - If i... Read more

MONEY

Saturday, March 26, 2011      3 comments

It can buy you a House, But not a Home. It can buy you a Bed, But not Sleep. It can buy you a Clock, But not Time. It can buy you a Book, But not Knowledge. It can buy you a Position, But not Respect. It ... Read more

The Yellow Light

Thursday, March 17, 2011      6 comments

The light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman was furious and honked her ho... Read more

Getting Old

Sunday, March 13, 2011      7 comments

- Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it. - The older we get, th... Read more

Prayer for Japan

Saturday, March 12, 2011      4 comments

Great Father God, I ask for prayers for the healing of the people of northern Japan in this time of great distress. I ask for ease and sweetness to enfold the spirits of so many newly dead, who died in fear and confusion. I as... Read more

More Bumper Stickers

Monday, March 07, 2011      3 comments

- We're staying together for the sake of the cats. - Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition. - This is not an abandoned vehicle. - I don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily. - It's as bad as you think and they ar... Read more

Bumper Stickers

Friday, March 04, 2011      3 comments

WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship. 

BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore. 

So you're a feminist...Isn't that cute. 

 Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. 

 ... Read more

2010 Stella Awards

Wednesday, March 02, 2011      3 comments

It's time again for the annual 'Stella Awards'! For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico , where she purchased co... Read more

The Five Toughest Questions for Men

Saturday, February 26, 2011      3 comments

The 5 toughest questions for men are: 1. What are you thinking about? 2. Do you love me? 3. Do I look fat? 4. Do you think she is prettier than me? 5. What would you do if I died? What makes these questions so difficult i... Read more

Sleeping Problems

Thursday, February 24, 2011      0 comments

Each year, the average person swallows 46,000 spiders in his or her sleep, meaning that, statistically speaking, you currently have 12 spiders in your mouth. But unintended nocturnal arachnid consumption isn't the only nuisance you might encount... Read more


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