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    SUNSHINE65   65,111
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Health Club

Sunday, July 01, 2012      8 comments

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Church Bulletin Bloopers

Sunday, July 01, 2012      12 comments

"When parking on the north side of the church, please remember to park on an angel." "The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment, and gracious hostility." " For those who have children and don't know it, there... Read more

Rules for When You Find Yourself in a Horror Movie

Sunday, July 01, 2012      3 comments

- Don't assume the telephone calls are coming from another house. - When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it's really dead. - Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke. - Don't... Read more

TELL ME THIS WON'T HAPPEN TO US !!!!

Saturday, June 30, 2012      10 comments

An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: 'They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accele... Read more

I Want to Buy That

Saturday, June 30, 2012      4 comments

A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and... Read more

Form Feed

Saturday, June 30, 2012      2 comments

Insurance form question and answer about a recent accident: Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident? A: I could have traveled by bus. A man collided with a cow and completed the requested form as follows: ... Read more

St. Peter's Book

Saturday, June 30, 2012      5 comments

A man arrives at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted. St. Peter is reading through the Big Book to see if the guy's name is written in it. After several minutes, St. Peter closes the book, furrows his brow, and says, "I'm sorry, I don't see... Read more

Leave your shoes at the door

Wednesday, June 27, 2012      8 comments

While carpenters were working outside the old house I had just bought, I busied myself with indoor cleaning. I had just finished washing the floor when one of the workmen asked to use the bathroom. With dismay I looked from his muddy boots... Read more

DMV hi lites

Wednesday, June 27, 2012      6 comments

It was just another day at the DMV. I had taken a woman out on her driving test when a police cruiser came up behind us--sirens wailing, lights flashing. "Was I speeding?" she asked the officer, after both cars pulled over. "No," sai... Read more

Jets Fan

Wednesday, June 27, 2012      2 comments

A guy walks into a bar with a dachshund under his arm. The dog is wearing a Jets jersey helmet and is holding Jets pom poms. The bartender says,"Hey! No pets allowed in here! You'll have to leave!" The man begs, "Look I'm desperate. ... Read more

Success

Wednesday, June 27, 2012      3 comments

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the... Read more

Modern Technology

Tuesday, June 26, 2012      4 comments

I saw a lady at work today putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. I inquired as to what she was doing and she said she was shopping on the internet, and they asked for a credit card number, so she was using ... Read more

If Only You Had Looked

Tuesday, June 26, 2012      5 comments

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second. "I froze to death," says the second. "That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?" ... Read more

Grandpa, What's it like to be old?

Monday, June 25, 2012      6 comments

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Political Quotes

Sunday, June 24, 2012      4 comments

"I resent your insinuendoes." "If we don't make some changes, the status quo will remain the same." "We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world." "I support efforts to limit the terms of members of Congr... Read more


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