Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation.
"How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.
"I froze to death," says the second.
"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"
... Read more
Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream 'racism' these days:
A customer asked, "In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?"
The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?"
The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I ... Read more
"The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or dog?"
"Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."
"Life's tough, it's tougher if you're stupid." ... Read more
Q 1. In which battle did Napoleon die?*
his last battle
Q 2. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?*
at the bottom of the page
Q 3. River Ravi flows in which state?*
Q 4.... Read more
One day a group of scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him.
The scientist walked up to God and said, "God, we'v... Read more
- A medical student was working in the toxicology department at the poison control center. A woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. The medical student quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful a... Read more
My friend sat down with a new client at her gym to review her application. For the question "To what do you attribute your fitness issues?" the woman wrote, "Horrendous eating habits."
"What makes you answer that?" my friend asked.
The... Read more
I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone. I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.
I have, however, been in Sane. The... Read more
The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that; “When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, best strategy is to dismount ".
However, in government, more advanced strategies are often employ... Read more
"A new study says that women who drink moderate amounts of alcohol every day lose more weight than women that don't drink at all. At least, that's what your wife will slur to you after she forgets to pick up the kids from soccer practice." -Jimm... Read more
A marvelous article by Michael Roizen, M.D. and Mehmet Oz, M.D.
Topping off the growing stack of great stuff that vitamin D-3 does for you is this good news: Keeping your levels up dramatically lowers your risk for PDQ (Pee Doesn't Quit). ... Read more