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RUBENSMUSE81's Blog Entry Summary View

After the Storm

Saturday, June 04, 2011      2 comments

Well, today is a new day. I'm feeling much more serene today then the state I was in when I wrote last nights blog. Things just build and build and you either need to explode or implode. The tornado has passed though and now its just ti... Read more

The "F" word

Saturday, June 04, 2011      4 comments

I'm angry. I'm so angry! Not because of any particular situation that set me off but I'm angry at the whole of it. I'm fed up at being looked at as less of a person because I'm more of a person. Overweight people are treated like lepers i... Read more

Sleep per chance to dream...

Monday, May 23, 2011      5 comments

Since becoming unemployed two months ago (or was it three months ago), I have gradually begun to lose interest in doing anything. I apply for jobs, just to not get any response. I go to career counselling for additional help. I'm looking i... Read more

Fear of losing weight?

Monday, May 16, 2011      8 comments

Well, I lost 2lbs. Pure luck this time though, since I never actually did anything this week. I've actually been considering lately that maybe I have a fear about losing the weight and maybe I self sabatoge because of this. I wonder ... Read more

The Day Before

Sunday, May 08, 2011      2 comments

Well... I'm about to start my first Spark's challenge. I have a few feelings that I'm fighting back. Fear. Despair. Anxiety. I feel anxious about the challenge, fear that I'll fail by not even trying, and despair for failing before ... Read more

This Feels Like A Blah Day!

Wednesday, May 04, 2011      4 comments

I felt like doing nothing today. I certainly didn't want to eat or move. I took a three hour nap, had a hot water bottle on my back, ate a bowl full of nachos with a chocolate bar, and cried while watching Toy Story 3. Yes, that's righ... Read more

Thank you for the welcome!

Monday, May 02, 2011      2 comments

I want to thank all of you for welcoming me to your community. I was hoping to thank each one of you but unfortunately, until I get my points up, I'm not able to do so. I just want everyone to know that it means a lot to me that there are ... Read more

Introducing Me

Monday, May 02, 2011      10 comments

I am 315lbs and have no dillusions about the fact that I need to lose weight. When I look in the mirror, I don't see a sloven, obese pig. I see thick, blonde hair, large breasts, my father's pale blue eyes and dimples, and my mother's high... Read more