8,500-9,999 SparkPoints 8,771


Got on the scale.
Tuesday, June 06, 2017      5 comments

It's been about six months since I began eating myself to death again from stress.i haven't weighed really in all that time. The scale was about as bad as I expected. But I feel courageous for even getting on the scale. At least I know the dam... Read more
Talking myself up to make a good choice.
Friday, May 26, 2017      3 comments

So, it's afternoon. I had greek yogurt and protein shake this morning. It's time for lunch. I'm hungry and anxious. I have so many big project things I should do (mostly academic writing). I want to eat that stress away. It's really importan... Read more
Seeing my food counselor tomorrow
Tuesday, May 23, 2017      7 comments

It seems there is good news to report over the last few weeks. I am slowly getting control again. No weight loss yet, but no gain either. There was/is just so many little layers to get through, choices to tweak, and things to know. I am not at m... Read more
Avoided a huge emotional carb binge
Monday, May 22, 2017      5 comments

I went to a mammogram today and had to explain to a nurse why a plastic surgeon mutilated me. I wanted to eat a stick of sugar cane raw. Went for baked chicken instead. Still probably too big a portion, but in truth a lot less damage than I cou... Read more
Work out headspace
Saturday, May 20, 2017      2 comments

So, at my previous gym there was this trainer that I adore. I'll call her Omega. Omega's workouts are the hardest at the gym. But it was always positive and capacity building and varied. She's amazing. And she brought me to that perfect exercise... Read more
Monday, May 08, 2017      1 comments

I tracked my food honestly today. I got a half hour of core work in at the gym. I've eaten "not entirely crazily" but it's night time and all I want to do is nosh.... Read more
Saturday, May 06, 2017      3 comments

Yesterday's food was less bad...until the fast food binge literally in the middle of the night. Why am I punishing myself?... Read more
The truth of my own eating habits
Thursday, May 04, 2017      9 comments

Being this real in my food log is excruciating.... Read more
Gonna try tracking honestly today
Tuesday, May 02, 2017      6 comments

It's gonna be bad. Can I preemptively forgive myself on the name of a fresh start, a new time to try again?... Read more
Scared by the tracker
Sunday, April 30, 2017      3 comments

The food tracker popped up this morning. I realized I had made plans to eat badly later at a buffet brunch and so had let myself eat bad carbs for breakfast. I wasn't ready to tell my tracker the truth. I felt affronted by its implicit request, ... Read more
Feeling open.
Saturday, April 29, 2017      2 comments

It's been a good afternoon for dealing with my own feelings. I managed an afternoon with most people outta my head.that was spa like. An old villian attacked this morning. But my embodiment is now on a different tact than when this old villian ... Read more
So, it been a while
Saturday, April 29, 2017      3 comments

you wouldn't believe the stuff I had to do to get out from everyone else's good intentions. I put a shield up that is longer than the great wall of china and higher than that Marriott hotel in Dubai. ... Read more
Back again
Monday, August 05, 2013      1 comments

I just spent about four days eating my way through an emotional crisis. I really need to develop better skills.... Read more
After Surgery
Thursday, February 07, 2013      1 comments

I am allowed to workout again. It's limited, twice a week, with just walking for cardio, but its something and I find it's enough to make it feel like food tracking is worth it again.... Read more
Thanksgiving BlowOut
Monday, November 26, 2012      3 comments

I gained six pounds in 36 hours of eating. And normally, I know how to deal with a binge. I just get back on track the next food decision. But I have a surgery coming up, I need to be fortifying my body, not dieting, so now I feel I have to l... Read more

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