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    PT.JEFFGIRL   142,953
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The Svot

Saturday, May 02, 2015      1 comments

A Scot returned home to Glasgow after a trip down south to London. He complained to his friend the Londoners were so rude. "They kept banging on the door, knocking on the ceiling, hammering on the floor, at three o'clock in the morning." "... Read more

Devil Shopping

Wednesday, April 29, 2015      6 comments

The poor country pastor was livid when he confronted his wife with the receipt for a $250 dress she had bought. "How could you do this!" he exclaimed. "I don't know," she wailed, "I was standing in the store looking at the dress. Then I fo... Read more

Doctor Visit

Tuesday, April 28, 2015      6 comments

After a discussion with a patient, the doctor ended the talk with "I Love You". Following an awkward pause, he said, "I'm sorry. You were telling me what to do so it made me think I was speaking with my wife". From Reader's Digest... Read more

The Captain's Secret

Monday, April 27, 2015      5 comments

Once upon a time there was a famous sea captain. This captain was very successful at what he did; for years he guided merchant ships all over the world. Never did stormy seas or pirates get the best of him. He was admired by his crew and fellow ... Read more

Bidding

Sunday, April 26, 2015      6 comments

One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher. Finally, after he bid w... Read more

Medical Problem

Sunday, March 15, 2015      6 comments

A man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn't been feeling well. The doctor examines him, leaves the room and comes back with three different bottles of pills. The doctor says, "Take the green pill with a big glass of water when yo... Read more

Epidural

Saturday, March 14, 2015      6 comments

My niece, pregnant with her second child, was certain she wanted an epidural for pain management during childbirth. Her doctor asked her at which stage of labor she wanted the epidural administered. Her response: "Just meet me in the parki... Read more

Actual Accident Reports

Tuesday, March 10, 2015      5 comments

Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have. The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I ... Read more

Leaning Slightly (A Little Corny)

Wednesday, March 04, 2015      5 comments

I have this friend who always seemed to lean slightly to the left all the time. It used to bother me, so I suggested he see a doctor, and have his legs checked out. For years, he refused... told me I was crazy. But last week, he fina... Read more

AAADD-(Long, But Worth The Read, I Think)

Monday, March 02, 2015      6 comments

Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide my car needs was... Read more

Scary Sunday

Saturday, February 21, 2015      5 comments

One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in tiny Smithville wakes up early and goes to their local church. Before the service starts, the townspeople sit in their pews and talk about their lives, their families, etc. Suddenly, at the... Read more

The New Baby

Tuesday, January 20, 2015      5 comments

With all the new fertility technology , a 66 year old woman was recently able to give birth to a baby. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, her relatives came to visit. "May we see the new baby?" one asked. "Not y... Read more

Excited Father

Tuesday, December 30, 2014      5 comments

The new father ran out of the delivery room and announced to the rest of his family who were waiting for the news: "We had twins!" The family was so excited they immediately asked, "Who do they look like?" The father paused, smiled, ... Read more

Letter From School

Monday, November 10, 2014      3 comments

Dear Dad, $chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply can't think of anything I need, $o if you like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love,Your $on... Read more

The Lord

Saturday, November 01, 2014      4 comments

A very religious man lived right next door to an atheist. While the religious one prayed day in, day out, and was constantly on his knees in communion with his Lord, the atheist never even looked twice at a church. However, the atheist's l... Read more


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