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    PATRICIAANN46   332,529
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The Christmas Pageant

Saturday, December 15, 2012      16 comments

My husband and I had been happily married (most of the time) for five years but hadn't been blessed with a baby. I decided to do some serious praying and promised God that if he would give us a child, I would be a perfect mother, love it wi... Read more


Friday, December 14, 2012      12 comments

Let me start by saying that I am a retired teacher. In all of my college classes and during my Practice Teaching experience, I do NOT remember any of my professors informing me that I would not only be teaching my subject matter to my students,... Read more

The Perfect Husband

Thursday, December 13, 2012      17 comments

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. MAN: "Hello." WOMAN: "Hi Honey, it's ... Read more

Holy E-Mail

Wednesday, December 12, 2012      13 comments

One day God was looking down at earth and saw all of the rascally behavior that was going on. So He called His angels and sent one to earth for a time. When the angel returned, he told God, "Yes, it is bad on earth; 95% are misbehaving... Read more

The Holidays

Tuesday, December 11, 2012      9 comments

The Holidays according to Maxine: "The Holidays always make me want to deck something.........but it ain't the halls!" "If I wanted a fat, bald guy to show up at my house with gifts, I'd do online dating!" "I don't know when or ho... Read more

Gingerbread Men

Monday, December 10, 2012      10 comments

Following are two quotes from Maxine re: Gingerbread Men. "Notice how the recipe for gingerbread men doesn't call for manners or brains?" "The great thing about gingerbread men is that each one is a new chance to bite somebody's head o... Read more

Maxine On Christmas

Sunday, December 09, 2012      9 comments

This one is SOOOOO me!!!!! I've decided to bake this Christmas. So don't tell me miracles don't happen!!! emoticonRead more

The Banana Test

Saturday, December 08, 2012      12 comments

There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are four animals. A Lion A Chimp A Giraffe And a Squirrel They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree. Who do you guess will win? ... Read more

My Three Favorites

Friday, December 07, 2012      13 comments

My three favorite "Old Is When" statements are: "Old Is When"............. Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot!!! "Old Is When".............. A sexy babe or hunk catches your fancy....... And... Read more


Thursday, December 06, 2012      11 comments

Our 14-year-old dog Abbey died last month. The day after she passed away my 4-year-old daughter Meredith was crying and talking about how much she missed Abbey. She asked if we could write a letter to God so that when Abbey got to heaven, God ... Read more

Denver Airport...United Airlines Agent At Gate 14

Wednesday, December 05, 2012      14 comments

It happened at the Denver Airport. This is hilarious. I wish I had the guts of this girl. An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being smart and funny, while making her point, when confronted with a passenger who p... Read more

The Brick

Tuesday, December 04, 2012      15 comments

A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car p... Read more

Sliding Down The Banister Of Life Towards 2013

Monday, December 03, 2012      9 comments

Some Maxines' to lighten your day........ My mind works like lightning, one brilliant Flash and it is gone. (No kidding!!!) The only time the world beats a path to Your door is if you're in the bathroom. (How true!) I hate sex i... Read more

Live Your Life To The Fullest

Sunday, December 02, 2012      11 comments

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when y... Read more

Some Timeless Relationship Advice

Saturday, December 01, 2012      13 comments

It's true that we don't know what we've got until it's gone, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives....... Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they'll love you back!!! Don't e... Read more

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