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    NIKKICOLE83   19,543
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Why Healthy is Better than Skinny

Wednesday, November 10, 2010      7 comments

All my life I have wanted to be thin. Up until a couple of months ago I assumed all my problems would whip away in the wind if I could just lose weight. But last night I started thinking, "Being skinny isn't always THAT great." Now that isn't... Read more

Are You Surviving?

Tuesday, November 09, 2010      3 comments

I watched my daughter die. I held her hand and told her that I would be okay and that I was proud of her and I watched the life leave her body. I told her i would be okay because I didn't want her to worry. I didn't want her to fight anymore.... Read more

I Need Rehab!

Monday, November 08, 2010      4 comments

I'm tweaking out. At night I am on edge waiting for my next hit. I'm constantly chasing a high. I relapsed this weekend. After being clean for 67 days, I caved. I crumbled. i LET THE DRUG WIN. I am a food addict. I have been one my e... Read more

Self Sabotage Instructions

Sunday, November 07, 2010      5 comments

Have you ever wondered to yourself, "Self, how can I sabotage my goals today? " Don't know how to do it? Well let me instruct you how: 1. Go out for all-you-can-eat shrimp. Take your thinnest friend with the best metabolism and convince you... Read more

I've Got a Date: Part Deux

Saturday, November 06, 2010      3 comments

I am in love. Not in love with my date (though he would be easy to fall for) but in love with chivalry. My date treated me like such a lady. Rather than honk the horn when he arrived at my apartment, he walked up three flights of stairs and g... Read more

I've got a date!

Friday, November 05, 2010      4 comments

I am so excited. And anxious. And worrisome. I am going out with the most elligible bachelor in my circle and though I know I am a good catch, I can't help but think he will notice my every flaw tonight. Will I talk too much, or laugh too loud?... Read more

Pencil Skirt

Thursday, November 04, 2010      7 comments

Yesterday I tried on a pencil skirt. The archnemesis of every fat girl nation wide. I had gone into Torrid to find a cute outfit for my date tomorrow (that's right). Instinctively I grabbed some jeans and loose tops. On my way into the dress... Read more

I can make you thin!

Wednesday, November 03, 2010      2 comments

Those are the words I came across while shopping for books online. Plastered on a glossy white hardback, "I can make you thin!" Standing there an average size balding guy in a business suit. Really? You're the guy that's gonna get me skinny?... Read more

The Naked Me

Tuesday, November 02, 2010      4 comments

I've been walking around my apartment naked. All the time. For no apparent reason. Washing the dishes in the buff doesn't get the plates any cleaner. Sometimes I forget to close the curtains as I saunter around au natural. Do I have the hott... Read more

Weight Loss: the trickiest math equation

Thursday, October 28, 2010      2 comments

So supposedly losing weight comes down to one basic equation: calories in vs. calories out. Well I beg to differ. Acutally, I bet the growing bunion on my right foot that it is much more difficult than that. Perhaps that would explain why fo... Read more

Perservering thru my loss

Tuesday, October 26, 2010      4 comments

Five months ago I lost my beautiful baby girl Alicia. She was more than the joy of my life; she was the blood flowing thru my veins. Born 3 months premature and at a tiny 2 lbs 8 ounces, she was a miracle at birth. She underwent 11 and a half... Read more

Muscle Fatigue and Why I Love it

Tuesday, October 19, 2010      1 comments

So today my back hurts. My legs are sore and my arms are caving in on themselves. I would cry but I am afraid that any extra energy exerted will cause a muscle spasm. The funny thing is all this pain feels sooo good. Not in a sadomasochist k... Read more


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