Addiction, Acceptance, Abstinence
I'm not very good at this lately.
In spite of not one but TWO therapists, all of the reading, all of the information, all of the knowledge I possess about nutrition, exercise, metabolism, weight loss, yadda yadda yadda, I cannot seem to g... Read more
Another binge and shame and tears
This is so hard.
I'm disgusted, frustrated, ashamed, angry.
I don't even know what to say anymore that I haven't said a million times already.
I would give anything to get rid of this. Every minute I'm awake is about this a... Read more
It's me again.
First of all, I want to say thank you to everyone for the condolences for the loss of my friend. October was a hard month. Personally, I'm glad it's behind me.
So here I am today. One pound away from my highest-ever-weight.
I ha... Read more
I'm not sure if I wrote about this before, but an old friend lost her battle with stomach cancer and was in hospice care at her mom's house since Sept 23.
She passed away on Oct 8th.
I have been struggling since I realized that the... Read more
I don't understand why I'm not losing weight. I'm really frustrated, so if you don't want to read a rant, you might want to leave now. :)
I know my body isn't a robot that will do X if I do Y. BUT, with all the nutrition and health info ... Read more
Crawling still counts as moving forward
It's so hard to keep going sometimes when I don't see progress. I'm trying to stay in the moment. I'm making healthy choices, getting some movement, ... Read more
I've been sick for a week and I'm slowly getting better.
Today I'm trying to focus on the present and not look at the scale or the exercise I ha... Read more
Don't weigh yourself when you're sick and other lessons learned the hard way.
Somehow I've gained 7 pounds since I came down with the flu.
I "know" it's probably fluid retention...my body is busy fighting off germs.
Regardless, it's hard to not be upset. I can throw a ton of logic at it, but inside me I want... Read more
The plague and other stuff
Well, well, well.
My husband got sick on Monday. I blame the people he works with that have kids. With kids back in school now, they're spreading their nasty little kid germs hither and yon. Thanks a ton!
OK, so I'm Sparking like all-get-out...
...but how do I find time for the rest of my real life??
This pic cracks me up:
But for realz, yo, how do we Spark without spending all day ... Read more
I've been crazy-busy the past few days. It's really a full-time job keeping up with what's going on here, plus tracking food, exercising, cooking, meal-planning, grocery-listing, etc. etc. etc.
I'm desperately trying to recruit ... Read more
Now I've done it!
I'm now one of the leaders of a team here, the "400 (more or less)" Team.
It needs active members!! While you might not be 400 or more, you most certainly are "less", and everyone is welcome.
At this size, I know people face many ch... Read more
From Zero to Hero
The ONE thing that I've not been doing is exercise. It's the hardest thing for me for several reasons:
1. My size. At over 400 lbs, physical activity is challenging and can actually be dangerous if I'm not smart about it.
2. I hate it.... Read more
There's something to be said for that. Pretty sure the depression meds I've been taking forever aren't working anymore.
Hard to be positive when you don't FEEL positive. I'm grateful to have my life, yet seem to be unable to do what I n... Read more
Checking in again -
The intestinal plague is starting to go away. I still can't predict what's going to happen after I eat, but at least not EVERY meal results in a mad dash to the "powder room".
Because the plague wasn't bad enough, I'm also dealing with so... Read more
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