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To all my Southern friends, I do really love you!!!
A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out
of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph,
enjoying the w... Read more
It's late fall and the Indians on a remote reservation in Oklahoma asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild.
Since he was a chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secret... Read more
THE YEAR'S BEST COMEBACK RESPONSES!!!!
If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman.
He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer's credib... Read more
Adam was hanging around the Garden of Eden!!!!!!
Adam was hanging around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely.
So, God asked him, 'What's wrong with you?'
Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to.
God said that He was going to make Adam a companion
And tha... Read more
The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a saloon and sat down to drink a Beer.
After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said "Who Owns the big white horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, ... Read more
I woke up,
I lifted my arms,
I moved my knees,
I turned my neck...Everything made the same noise:
Two Little Boys!!!
Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, are excessively
mischievous. They are always getting into trouble and their parents know if any mischief occurs in their town, the two boys are probably involved.
The boys' mother heard that a ... Read more
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs.
Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Nova Scotia back... Read more
UGLY STORY OF THE LITTLE DUCKS!!!!!!
Three women die together in an accident
and go to heaven.
When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: don't step on the ducks!"
So they enter heaven, and sure en... Read more
SENIOR MEDICINE CABINET!!!!!
It has taken me many months of my retirement time, but I
have just finished building my new Medicine Cabinet.
It's Hell to get Old!!!
Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly.
One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndr... Read more
Being deported.....to where?????
Send this to your kids or relatives also so they know what happened to you.
To help save the economy, the Government will an... Read more
MICHELIN MAN DENIES PATERNITY SUIT....CLAIMS CHILD IS NOT HIS!!!!
What do you think?!?!?!?!
The Seven Dwarfs of Menopause
he Seven Dwarfs of Menopause arrived at my door without warning: Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful and All-Dried-Up.
One by one they crept into my own private cottage in the woods and started to take over my life. ... Read more
Why we love Children!!!
1. A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was
dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil.
"Because I pi$$ed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child
innocently. You d... Read more
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