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    MILLISMA   220,965
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Things My Mother Taught Me!!!!!

Tuesday, July 05, 2011      23 comments

~ AUTHOR UNKNOWN ~ 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. “If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out ... Read more

3 Norwegians

Monday, July 04, 2011      22 comments

Three Norwegians go down to Mexico to celebrate college graduation. They get drunk, and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what ... Read more

Dinner!!!!

Sunday, July 03, 2011      21 comments

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass ey... Read more

Lunch with the girls through the ages!!!!

Saturday, July 02, 2011      19 comments

A group of 15-year-old girlfriends discussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet at the Dairy Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant because they had only $6.00 among them and Jimmy Johnson, the cute boy ... Read more

Witticisms of Ignorance!!!!

Friday, July 01, 2011      21 comments

-It 's not whether you win or lose, but how you place the blame. -You are not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. -We have enough youth.. How about a fountain of "smart"? -The original... Read more

Reincarnation

Thursday, June 30, 2011      19 comments

A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all. After a long life together, the husband was the first ... Read more

They "Still" Walk Amoung Us!!!!

Wednesday, June 29, 2011      27 comments

NEW YORK - resident Kathy Evans brought humiliation to her friends and family when she set a new standard for stupidity with her appearance on the popular TV show, 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.' Evans, a 32-year-old wif... Read more

Black and White TV!

Tuesday, June 28, 2011      23 comments

After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said ... "Fifty" years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every ni... Read more

Notes to God from the Dog

Monday, June 27, 2011      24 comments

Dear God: Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed ? Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another ? Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it... Read more

Oldie but Goodie!

Sunday, June 26, 2011      19 comments

A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns Inside, he finds a couple in bed. He orders the guy out of the bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed the convict ge... Read more

Another "Why Teachers Drink"!!!!

Saturday, June 25, 2011      18 comments

The following questions were set in last year's GED examination These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)............and they WILL breed and vote Q. Name the four seasons A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar Q. Explai... Read more

HELL explained.....you're gonna love it!!!!

Friday, June 24, 2011      28 comments

HELL EXPLAINED BY A CHEMISTRY STUDENT The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. --------- The answer by one... Read more

For the Continually Curious!!!

Thursday, June 23, 2011      20 comments

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THE MIRACLE OF TOILET PAPER

Wednesday, June 22, 2011      30 comments

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. ... Read more

Ten thoughts to ponder:

Tuesday, June 21, 2011      22 comments

Number 10: Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwic... Read more


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