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MARYJOANNA
200,000-249,999 SparkPoints 205,579
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MARYJOANNA's Blogs

WILL ROGERS QUOTE
Sunday, May 20, 2012      2 comments

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. Food for thought?... Read more
IRISH LEFTOVERS
Saturday, May 19, 2012      2 comments

Gallagher opened the morning newspapers and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney. "Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher? "They sat U dued!!" "Yes, I saw it!" ... Read more
CHILDREN'S LOGIC
Thursday, May 17, 2012      2 comments

Teacher: Give me a sentence about a public servant. A small boy wrote: The fireman came down the ladder pregnant. Teacher took him aside to correct him. Don't you know what pregnant means? Sure, said the young boy confidently. ... Read more
REDNECK JOKES
Wednesday, May 16, 2012      2 comments

You might be a redneck if... You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog. You might be a redneck if... Jack Daniels make your list of "Most Admired People"... Read more
CUTE PUNS
Monday, May 14, 2012      3 comments

She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion. A small boy swallowed some coins ... Read more
DON'T YA LOVE IT!
Saturday, May 12, 2012      1 comments

Did you hear about the 83 year old woman who talked herself out of a speeding ticket by telling the young officer that she had to get to there before she forgot where she was going? Makes perfectly good sense to me . . . .... Read more
GRANDCHILDREN
Thursday, May 10, 2012      3 comments

A second grader came home from school and said to her grandma, " Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother , more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said. "How to... Read more
WHAT IS A REDNECK?
Tuesday, May 08, 2012      2 comments

You might be a Redneck if... You think the French Riviera is a foreign car.... Read more
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Sunday, May 06, 2012      2 comments

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.... Read more
YOU'D THINK TEACHERS WOULD LEARN
Thursday, April 26, 2012      1 comments

The teacher decided to have a pop test on spelling. She asked little Johnny to come to the board and spell 'straight'. He did without error and turned to the teacher with his usual 'ha ha; smirk. "That's correct, Johnny, not what is the de... Read more
GRANDCHILDREN
Tuesday, April 24, 2012      2 comments

I was in the bathroom, putting on my makeup, under the watchful eyes of my young granddaughter, as she'd done many times before. After I applied my lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Grandma, you forgot to kiss the toilet ... Read more
COOL STUD!
Friday, April 20, 2012      1 comments

Two men died and went to Heaven. St. Peter greeted them, and said "I'm sorry, gentlemen, but your mansions are not ready yet. Until they are, I can send you back to Earth as whatever you want to be." "Great!" said the first guy, "I want to be... Read more
SAY WHAT?
Thursday, April 05, 2012      3 comments

Bob: I weighed myself on one of those scales that also tells you about yourself. I'll have you know that it said that "I was very intelligent, handsome and liked by everyone I meet." Stephanie: Did it get your weight even close?... Read more
PAYBACKS. . .
Tuesday, April 03, 2012      3 comments

A man mentioned to his landlord about the tenants in the apartment over his. "Many a night they stamp on the floor and shout till midnight." When the landlord asked if it bothered him, he replied, "Not really, for I usually stay up and practic... Read more
There's Just No Talking to Some People
Saturday, March 31, 2012      1 comments

This is the story of the poor blonde flying in a two-seater aiirplane with just the pilot. He has a heart attack and dies. She frantically calls a May Day; May Day! May Day! Help me! Help me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead. An... Read more

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