An Alabama preacher said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumour that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. It is a horrible lie and one that a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to ... Read more
Pretty sure these are all true. Would I lie??????
1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
3.... Read more
What is Old?
"OLD" IS WHEN..... Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Choose one, I can't do both!"
"OLD" IS WHEN…. Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
"OLD" IS WHEN... Read more
Our next trip - Wonders of the American West!
Well, our first trip is just over and what a trip! We've had so much fun, great company with 38 other people, good Tour Director and Coach Driver and such beautiful places we visited! WOW! I will post photos, plenty taken but having problems ... Read more
Our first tour - American Parks Trail!
On Friday 16th September we begin the first of our 2 coach tours of National Parks.
This was the reason for our 7 week holidaying around the USA. Once we got those tours organized, everything else fell into place, including meeting so many of... Read more
After being married for thirty years....a wife asked her husband to describe her.
He looked at her slowly...then said, "You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."
She asked, "What does that mean?"
He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute... Read more
From the American Association Of Retired People
Q: Where can men over the age of 60 find younger women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore under fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finis... Read more
Just one more sleep!
In about 12 hours we leave home on our way to the airport to fly to Scotland with an overnight stopover in Bangkok.
I've had a very busy day today. Went for my walk this morning with SIL even though it was raining. When we started our wal... Read more
6 degrees of blonde.
Please note, I am blonde, lol.
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.
The wife (undoubtedly blonde),... Read more
Did you hear about the guy who was in a bar about as drunk as it's possible
to get? Legless!
A group of guys notice his condition and decide to be good Samaritans and
take him home.
First, they stand him up to get to his wallet so t... Read more
BLESSED ARE THE CRACKED, FOR THEY LET IN THE LIGHT!
1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences.
He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4.... Read more
A man had 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl. As he sits down, a man comes down and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him.
"No," he says, "The seat is empty."
"This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right m... Read more
One more week till our big adventure, meeting my Spark Friends around the world!
I am starting to get excited! One more week and we're on our way!
We fly out on Monday afternoon to Bangkok and spend the night there. Then board Lufthansa flight to Frankfurt and after a 6 hour wait we fly to Edinburgh. I've booked a car a... Read more
Qantas Airlines Mechanics' Wicked Sense Of Humour
The following e-mail whizzed around the web recently...
After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a "gripe sheet", which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correctio... Read more
Never Lie to a Woman!!!
A man called home to his wife and said, " Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his friends .
We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting, so co... Read more
Get An Email Alert Each Time ILOVEROSES Posts