HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD.
George Phillips, an elderly man, from Meridian, Mississippi, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the ... Read more
Proud American - Return On Investment!
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you would have $49.00 today!
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you would have $33.00 today.
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman ... Read more
Power of a Woman!!!
One night President Obama and his wife Michelle decided to do something out of routine and go for a casual dinner at a restaurant that wasn't too luxurious.
When they were seated, the owner of the restaurant asked the president's secret s... Read more
The Greek Priest is Leaving.
At the regular Sunday morning service, father George announced that he was
planning to leave for a larger church that would pay him more.
There is a hush within the congregation. No one wants him to leave, because he is so popular.
... Read more
A Bus, A Texan and A Zipper!
As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus.
Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reac... Read more
Microsoft Technical Support.
Mujibar was trying to get a job in India .
The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar,
You have passed all the tests, except one.
Unless you pass it , you cannot qualify for this job.'
Mujibar said, 'I am ready.'
The manager sa... Read more
"We didn't have the green thing back in my day."
Something to brag about if you're older.
In the line at the store, the cashier told the older woman that she should
bring her own grocery bag because plastic bags weren't good for the
The woman apologized to him and ... Read more
Guys, very depressing news.
The Recession has hit everybody.....
I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.
CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Co... Read more
New ways of STEALING!
ESPECIALLY LOOK AT SCENE THREE.
This is a new one. People sure stay busy trying to cheat us, don't they?
A friend went to the local gym and placed his belongings in the locker. After the workout and a shower... Read more
A bit of Aussie humour!
Thought you may enjoy a chuckle at some Aussie humour.
A bit of Aussie culcha
LOG ON: Adding wood to make the Barbie/bbq hotter.
LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the Barbie.
MONI... Read more
Actual Worlwide Signs.
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.
A laundry in Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
WOU... Read more
The following were results for an Ozwords Competition
where entrants were asked to take an Australian word, alter it by only one
letter, and supply a new and witty definition.
You clearly need to be an Aussie to und... Read more
True stories from Doctors...
A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear.
Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs, and I ... Read more
POOF and the light goes off!
An 86-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his test results come back normal.
The doctor says, " Gary everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?"
Gary replies, "God and I ar... Read more
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded t... Read more
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