New ways of STEALING!
ESPECIALLY LOOK AT SCENE THREE.
This is a new one. People sure stay busy trying to cheat us, don't they?
A friend went to the local gym and placed his belongings in the locker. After the workout and a shower... Read more
A bit of Aussie humour!
Thought you may enjoy a chuckle at some Aussie humour.
A bit of Aussie culcha
LOG ON: Adding wood to make the Barbie/bbq hotter.
LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the Barbie.
MONI... Read more
Actual Worlwide Signs.
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.
A laundry in Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
WOU... Read more
The following were results for an Ozwords Competition
where entrants were asked to take an Australian word, alter it by only one
letter, and supply a new and witty definition.
You clearly need to be an Aussie to und... Read more
True stories from Doctors...
A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear.
Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs, and I ... Read more
POOF and the light goes off!
An 86-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his test results come back normal.
The doctor says, " Gary everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?"
Gary replies, "God and I ar... Read more
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded t... Read more
"Something About Wives"
My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
-----------------... Read more
7 Reasons Not To Mess With Children.
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl state... Read more
First time sex.
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night to meet and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time.
... Read more
INTERESTING FACTS BUT AMAZINGLY TRUE!
1. The sentence " The Quick Brown Fox Jumps Over The Lazy Dog" uses every letter in the English language.
2. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
3. The shortest war in history was b... Read more
HOW TO STAY YOUNG!
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height.
Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.
2. Keep only cheerful friends.
The grouches pull you down. (keep this in mind if you ar... Read more
People on a rope!
Don't think I need to comment on the story below!
Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter--ten men and one
woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided
that one had to leave, because oth... Read more
TOMMY COOPER - COMIC GENIUS
1. Two blondes walk into a building..........
you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.
2. Phone answering machine message -
...If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key...
3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wea... Read more
KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ!
Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better, even though I have it!!
Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is h... Read more