Believe it or not, this gives you one of the best explanations of our current unemployment.
COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America .
ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It's 7.8%.
COSTELLO:... Read more
An old Jewish guy goes to his doctor for his physical and gets sent to the Urologist as a precaution.
When he gets there, he discovers the Urologist is a very pretty female doctor.
The female doctor says,"I'm going to check your... Read more
During a lady's medical examination, the British doctor says, "Your heart, lungs, pulse and blood pressure are all fine. Now let me see the part that gets you ladies into all kinds of trouble."
The lady starts taking off her undie... Read more
A foursome is waiting at the men's tee while another foursome of women is hitting from the ladies' tee.
The ladies are taking their time. When the final lady is ready to hit her ball, she hacks it ten feet.
She goes over and whi... Read more
A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day.
Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, 'Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?'
Grandma ... Read more
SIMPLE TRUTH #1
Lovers help each other undress before sex.
However after sex, they always dress on their own.
Moral of the story: In life, no one helps you once you're screwed.
SIMPLE TRUTH #2
When a lady is pregnant,... Read more
Life is like a roll of toilet paper, it goes really fast at the end.
I don't trip over things, I do random gravity checks!
I don't need anger management. I need people to stop making me mad!
Old age is c... Read more
A Shaggy Dog Story.
As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his
mouth, reading: "10 lamb chops, please."
Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth, and
quick... Read more
The Pastor's Ass
The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again and it won again.
The local paper read:
PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT
... Read more
A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital where he had worked for most of his life.
A huge heart, covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the ho... Read more
As Good of an Explanation as I've Heard!
I feel better after reading this . . .
Brains of older people are slow because they know so much . People do not decline mentally with age, it just takes them longer to recall facts because they have more information in their brains, ... Read more
A.A.A.D.D.- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS!
Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car and... Read more
A week of Chuckles.
The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex.
Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact the family's status, she consulted the family doctor.
The doctor told her that... Read more
Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. He'd never been to church in his life.
After Mass, the priest caught up with him & said, "Murphy, I am so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?... Read more
Retiree Mental Fitness Evaluation
This test is to ascertain your mental state now. If you get one right you are doing ok, if you get none right you better go for counselling.
(I'll meet you there.)
There are 4 test questions. Don't miss one.
Giraffe Tes... Read more
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