FRUIT CAKE RECIPE - Guaranteed to put you in the holiday spirit.
You'll need the following: four large eggs, two cups of dried fruit, a teaspoon of baking soda, a teaspoon of salt, a cup of brown sugar, lemon juice, nuts, and a bottle or t... Read more
An older couple were lying in bed one night. The husband was falling asleep but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk.
She said, "You use to hold my hand when we were courting."
Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a sec... Read more
Blonde and the Cell Phone Gift
Bill bought his beautiful blonde wife, Sherry, a cell phone for their first wedding anniversary.
Sherry loved the gift, and watched intently as Bill explained all the features on the phone.
The next day, as Sherry is having ... Read more
A pastor concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons ... Read more
A mother took her little boy to church.
While in church the little boy said, “Mommy, I have to pee.”
The mother said to the little boy, “It’s not appropriate to say the word ‘pee’ in church. So, from now on whenever you have to ‘pee’ ju... Read more
Thank you to margemf.
A husband was having great difficulty getting along with his wife – nothing but arguing and friction – so he decided to consult a marriage counselor. After they had talked for a while, the counselor said, “I suggest... Read more
Seventh Degree of Blonde
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the
sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror
and says, 'Hmm, this person looks familiar.'
The second blonde sa... Read more
Another Blonde Joke
Home > Funny Stuff > Blonde Jokes > Blonde Looses Keys
Two blondes were going to the mall. When they got out of the car, they started tossing the car keys back and forth. One of the ... Read more
A young boy after hearing the story of Thanksgiving and how the Indians and the Pilgrims sat down together,climbed up into his father's lap and said, "Daddy, did you know that if we were Indians, you would be a brave and Mom would be a squawk?" ... Read more
When I was a young turkey, new to the coop...
My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop...
Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow...
And he told me there was something I had to know...
His look and his tone I will... Read more
Thank you margemf!
A man was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit. The driver, bein... Read more
Why, Why, Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the
batteries are getting weak?
Why do banks charge a fee due to insufficient funds when they already know
Why is it that when someone tells you tha... Read more
Thank you to margemf for this joke.
A scratch golfer hits his ball three hundred yards straight down the fairway, and it hits a sprinkler and careens off into the woods. He finds the ball, but trees surround it. He s pissed, says what the h... Read more
I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me bec... Read more
One older woman to another:
I changed the password on my computer to "incorrect." That way, when I forget my password, the computer will tell me, "Your password is incorrect!"... Read more