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    GERIKRAGH   211,785
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It's Hell to be Old

Wednesday, August 22, 2012      23 comments

It's Hell to be Old OLD people have problems that you haven't Even considered yet! An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical Exam. The doctor gave the man a jar... Read more

Classes for Men

Tuesday, August 21, 2012      16 comments

WICOE (Women In Charge Of Everything) Is proud to announce the opening of its EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN! OPEN TO MEN ONLY ALL ARE WELCOME Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maxim... Read more

The Toilet Seat

Monday, August 20, 2012      15 comments

My wife, Julie, had been after me for several weeks to paint the seat on our toilet. Finally, I got around to doing it while Julie was out. After finishing, I left to take care of another matter before she returned. She came in and ... Read more

The Importance of Walking

Sunday, August 19, 2012      17 comments

The Importance of walking Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $4,000 per month. My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he ... Read more

Men Should Think Before Speaking!

Saturday, August 18, 2012      19 comments

Thanks again to margemf for the joke: Morty was in his usual place in the morning sitting at the table, reading the paper after breakfast. He came across an article about a beautiful actress that was about to marry a football player who was... Read more

Virus

Friday, August 17, 2012      19 comments

A VIRUS is going round called Housework. If you feel the need to start housework - Stop Immediately!! This virus affects your sleep and wipes out your social life. It causes you to be late for luncheons with friends and disrup... Read more

Oops From the Olympics

Thursday, August 16, 2012      24 comments

Thank you margemf: Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentators during the Summer Olympics that they would like to take back: 1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch thi... Read more

Cup Holder

Wednesday, August 15, 2012      20 comments

Thank to margemf: True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp: Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?" Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?" Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. H... Read more

Paraprosdokians

Tuesday, August 14, 2012      19 comments

PARAPROSDOKIANS (say that fast three times)... (Winston Churchill loved them.) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous. 1. Where there's a will, I want to... Read more

Car Keys

Monday, August 13, 2012      21 comments

Several days ago as I left a meeting at a hotel; I desperately gave myself a personal pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing. Suddenly I realized I must... Read more

Black Bras

Friday, August 10, 2012      15 comments

A Chinese guy goes to a Jewish guy to buy black bras, Size 38. The Jewish guy, known for his skills as a businessman, says that black bras are rare and that he is finding it very difficult to buy them from his suppliers. Ther... Read more

Never Squat With Your Spurs On

Thursday, August 09, 2012      24 comments

Will Rogers , who died in a 1935 plane crash, was one of the greatest political sages this country has ever known. Some of his sayings: 1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco. 2. Never kick ... Read more

Man Problems

Wednesday, August 08, 2012      19 comments

Woman has Man in it; Mrs. has Mr. in it; Female has Male in it; She has He in it; Madam has Adam in it; Okay, Okay, it all makes sense now... I never looked at it this way before: Ever notice how all of ... Read more

Get Out!

Tuesday, August 07, 2012      22 comments

My wife was screaming at me: "Leave!! Get out of this house!" she ordered. As I was walking out the door she yelled, "I hope you die a slow and painful death!" So I turned around and replied "So now you want me to stay?" ... Read more

I Fish!

Monday, August 06, 2012      25 comments

After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came in for counseling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. On and on and on: neglect, l... Read more


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