Thank you again margemf!
A little boy blows up a balloon and starts flicking it all around the house with his finger.
His mother tells him to stop it as he's liable to break something, but the boy continues.
"Johnny!" Mom screams. "Kn... Read more
changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
How does Moses make his... Read more
A cow, an ant and an old fart are debating on who is the greatest of the three of them.
The cow said, "I give 20 quarts of milk every day and that's why I am the greatest!"
The ant said, "I work day and night, summer and winter, I can c... Read more
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball
headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at
his groin, f... Read more
Interesting bit of history trivia
ON JULY 20, 1969, AS COMMANDER OF THE APOLLO 11 LUNAR MODULE,
NEIL ARMSTRONG WAS THE FIRST PERSON TO SET FOOT ON THE MOON.
HIS FIRST WORDS AFTER STEPPING ON THE MOON:
"THAT'S ONE SMALL ST... Read more
A Priest was about to finish his tour of duty, and was leaving his Mission in the jungle where he has spent years teaching the natives when he realizes that the one thing he never taught them was how to speak English.
So he takes the ch... Read more
The 1st Affair
A married man was having an affair
With his secretary..
One day they went to her place
And made love all afternoon.
Exhausted, they fell asleep
And woke up at 8 PM.
The man hurriedly dressed
And tol... Read more
A middle-aged woman
seemed sheepish as she
visited her gynecologist.
'Come now,' coaxed the doctor,
'you've been seeing me for years.
There's nothing you can't tell me.'
'This one's kind of strange...'
'Let me ... Read more
While hiking down along the border this morning,
I saw a Muslim extremist fall into the Rio Grande River.
He was struggling to stay afloat because of all the guns and
bombs he was carrying.
Along with him was a Mexican who was a... Read more
A 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were ac... Read more
Thanks to margemf.
> > A mother and father take their 6 year old son to a nude beach.
> > As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have
> > boobs bigger
> > than his mother's, so he goes bac... Read more
Irish mother superior
In a convent in Ireland, the 98-year-old Mother Superior lay dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. They tried giving her warm milk to drink but she refused it.One of t... Read more
An 82-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his
tests come back normal so the doctor says, "Harry, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally
and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?"
Harry replies, "God and I are ... Read more
A direct quote from Larry the Cable Guy...
"Even after the Super Bowl victory by the New Orleans Saints, I have noticed a large number of people implying with bad jokes that Cajuns simply aren't smart people. I would like to stat... Read more